Birthday Party Gripe

[MamaMolly]

This is my own doing. I'm b!tching because I know I have no one to blame but myself, and I have to figure out what I'm going to and no one IRL (read that as DH) wants to hear me process.

So feel free to click the back button! ;)

DDs second birthday is next month. DH's parents want to come for it, fine. So we planned the party on a Saturday they can make it. Only thing is that I was planning on having a playdate/party at a local park with our house as back up in case of rain. Stupid me waited until now to try and book the park, which is naturally full. :banghead: Again, no one to blame but myself! DH of course wants to be there and is willing to take a day off work but I hate to have him do that. (We are starting fertility treatments and he'll be taking a lot of days here and there in the coming months plus he has a new supervisor...)

Add to that DDs playgroup is mostly boys and there are 10 of them. Please don't flame me! I know I'm generalizing! But it has been *my experience* for the last 2 years that the boys are more physical in their play than the girls. Again, an observational experience, not to be construed as a criticism at all. We have a tiny house, so plus the extra siblings we'd have 14 kids(!!!!) PLUS parents if everyone comes. That is crazy considering how small our house is! Plus the ILs and my Aunt and Uncle who would likely come...I was hoping that in case of rain and we had to move the party to the house then some folks would send regrets. ;)

And the last straw was this morning when I got an Evite for my neighbor's kid's party. Ugh. We just don't socialize much with the family. To be honest it wasn't even on my radar screen to invite him to DDs birthday. The ugly mean person in me (that came here to b!tch in the first place) feels like I'd *have* to invite him instead of *wanting* to. . They live 4 doors down (condo) so its not like I can have a party here and NOT invite him... So plus his little sister that makes 12 kids!

I've been hitting the back to school and end of season sales for DDs goody bags, and I don't think I'm going to have enough stuff... Oh good greif! This is getting out of hand.

But the good news is that during the time I've been typing this I've pretty much decided to do a Friday at the Park party if I can reserve the picnic area. DH can take a day, and I'll get over it. It is the course of least resistance. Ugh.

Thanks if you made it through this, and feel free to offer any advice or BTDT.

[LarsMal]

After trying to plan around everyone else's schedules, I finally had to just suck it up and pick a day. Unfortunately for DS (but yay for me!) only half the kids can come.

Does you DH have to take the whole day off?

I also have some neighbors I feel obligated to invite, but instead of sending an invitation, I just told her in passing (that's the b*tch in me!!!). We'll see if they show up!

As far as goody bags go, as long as you have a bucket for everyone, and you give them out as they are leaving, they won't know if they all have the same stuff inside. Just divide up what you have as best you can, and if one seems really low on the goodies, then pick up some stickers or something little from the dollar store, and don't worry about it! I hate the whole goody bag thing!

Good luck! I'm sure it will all work out just fine!

[bethie_73]

DH took the morning for DS's second B-day. We took 2 cars and he went on to work and we went home.

[MamaMolly]

Does you DH have to take the whole day off?

Not at all but that doesn't mean he wont! :) He'd take the day just to stay home and hang out. He has a ton of time on the books, so much that last year we lost a little of the use-it-or-loose-it time. I just feel guilty for some reason, even though it is his choice and he's happy to do it.

I think I'm getting myself all worked up about this even though it really won't be THAT big a deal after all. Reading your replies has helped to bring me back to reality. This is only going to be as stressful as I let it get, right?

And the nasty, evil mean b!tch in me is thinking that if it is on a Friday the the neighbor kiddo won't be able to come anyway because he'll be in daycare. Isn't that Grinchy and small hearted? But I can live with being Grinchy and small hearted.

[maestramommy]

If I were you I'd give helium balloons as favors. 2 yos love balloons. Any of the friends allergic to latex? If not, tie a balloon to each bag, and keep the goodie count low. I doubt they'd know the difference.

[LBW]

Can you downsize the party? Honestly, at 2, they don't care about the size of the party at all. Just invite your relatives and one or two close friends and their kids. We just attended a party like that and it was great. I think the kids had much more fun than they do at some of the huge parties we've attended. Plus, it was much less stressful for the parents!

[tylersmama]

If I were you I'd give helium balloons as favors. 2 yos love balloons. Any of the friends allergic to latex? If not, tie a balloon to each bag, and keep the goodie count low. I doubt they'd know the difference.
:yeahthat:

That's exactly what I did this year. Admittedly, I only had 5 kids total including DS, but after doing the whole shebang last year with goody bags and the whole nine yards, everybody was totally happy with cake and ice cream and balloons!

[MamaMolly]

:yeahthat:

That's exactly what I did this year. Admittedly, I only had 5 kids total including DS, but after doing the whole shebang last year with goody bags and the whole nine yards, everybody was totally happy with cake and ice cream and balloons!

I would normally do that. Last year I just gave homemade peek-a-boo bags for the kids but this year I found such great deals on pretty decent stuff that I decided to go for the buckets. I think I might just do a wrapped box of organic teething biscuts for the little ones.

I am NOT a big fan of huge parties, in fact I'm pretty opposed to it. This one just kind of got away from me. We have one group of 6 kids that are from her same age baby group and then I have 2 other friends with slightly older boys. It really is the fact that this year the kids are all more mobile plus the 5 younger siblings that will compound the chaos in our tiny home. I'm going to keep it simple with a playdate at the park and not do planned activities like pass the parcel or pin the tail on anything.

The thing is I've got to keep my head straight and *NOT* make this about trying to impress people or to prove myself or anything. As long as DD has a fun day then I'll be happy.

I appreciate everybody being kind and not taking me to task for being stupid or selfish, just offering sound advice and keeping me sane. Thanks!

[randomkid]

Have it on Friday - it's likely that they won't all be able to make it :)

[SnuggleBuggles]

I wish you lots of luck and may I suggest in the future going for the X number invited kids= X age (3 friends for when dc turns 3)? It has been wonderful! Big enough that it felt like a party (especially with the whole cake, decorations...) but was easy and mellow. My friends always walk away from ds1's parties saying they had a nice time because they could actually chat and enjoy. Small is good, in my book. :) For his 6th b-day I loosened up and let him invite a gazillion kids and for the 1st time I didn't do it at home.

It'll work out. Set an end time 1.5 hours after the start (family can stay longer). You can survive a busy party for that long. :)

Beth

[kransden]

I agree with other people. A balloon and/or a small goody bag as they leave is all you need! Have it on Fri. Have another family party for the ILs on Sat. They'll probably be happier with just dd to deal with.

[maestramommy]

I would normally do that. Last year I just gave homemade peek-a-boo bags for the kids but this year I found such great deals on pretty decent stuff that I decided to go for the buckets. I think I might just do a wrapped box of organic teething biscuts for the little ones.
Hey, that's a good idea! I wouldn't have thought of that, but I'm going to file it away for future reference lol!




The thing is I've got to keep my head straight and *NOT* make this about trying to impress people or to prove myself or anything. As long as DD has a fun day then I'll be happy.

That's a good attitude. I know you are hosting and that is always stressful, but if you remember these kids are only 2, try to have fun yourself being with the parents.