Didn't think this happened anymore...

[Wife_and_mommy]

I work in our church nursery occasionally when they need extra hands. This family brought their 4-6 month old in with two bottles. No problem, right?

When someone went to feed baby the bottle the contents didn't look like formula nor BM(which I know this family doesn't use). I was sniffing the contents trying to figure out what it was. One of the bottles was making me gag because it was sour. They're feeding this baby 2% cow's milk!! The dad was called to make sure the bottle was for baby. "Oh, yeah. She'll drink the whole thing."

So this baby was given a bottle of sour cow's milk for a meal. :32:I had to leave the room. No wonder it was taking her forever to drink it.:( She's a chunky baby so they probably think she's thriving.

I did throw out the extra bottle and told the supervisor about it. I don't know what the situation is. I know they have a 2 or so y.o. I just can't fathom that a parent would think it's okay to feed their baby sour milk. :(

[egoldber]

Was the father told that the bottle was sour? I would have refused to feed the baby a sour bottle. I can't believe the church would do that.

[gatorsmom]

I work in our church nursery occasionally when they need extra hands. This family brought their 4-6 month old in with two bottles. No problem, right?

When someone went to feed baby the bottle the contents didn't look like formula nor BM(which I know this family doesn't use). I was sniffing the contents trying to figure out what it was. One of the bottles was making me gag because it was sour. They're feeding this baby 2% cow's milk!! The dad was called to make sure the bottle was for baby. "Oh, yeah. She'll drink the whole thing."

So this baby was given a bottle of sour cow's milk for a meal. :32:I had to leave the room. No wonder it was taking her forever to drink it.:( She's a chunky baby so they probably think she's thriving.

I did throw out the extra bottle and told the supervisor about it. I don't know what the situation is. I know they have a 2 or so y.o. I just can't fathom that a parent would think it's okay to feed their baby sour milk. :(

I can't believe that anyone would sit down and feed a baby a bottle of sour milk whether the parent said to or not. I doubt the father knew the milk was sour. Whether he knew or not, I would have said to him, "this milk is sour. I can't feed this to your baby, it will make her sick. Did your pediatrician recommend cow's milk because I've heard that that is a big no-no for babies. Formula only until they are 12 months old."

Before I had the twins i worked in our church nursery. I would have had no problem talking this way to the parents if that ever happened at our church.

[kijip]

I agree with Lisa, they should have been told it was sour and that it is not an appropriate formula substitute for a 6 month old.

Maybe they do it due to $$ and someone could point them in the direction of WIC or the church's food pantry?

Being a chunky baby does not always equal healthy- she is missing many critical vitamins and nutrients on plain milk.

[ThreeofUs]

Wowww.... I didn't think feeding kids sour milk was *ever* thought to be a good idea, but this family sure sounds like it needs some education on feeding their babies. Could the church supervisor talk to the family about it, do you think?

[SnuggleBuggles]

:( Poor little baby.

Beth

[mommy111]

I'm inclined to think the fatehr didn't understand the milk was sour. Who would feed sour milk to their baby?

[Wife_and_mommy]

I appreciate your responses.

I had tremendous self-control this a.m. just throwing out the one bottle(I got this face from the others for it: :eek: )and not talking with them myself.

I'm hopeful that it will be addressed but will email the supervisor to confirm something will happen. I'll buy some formula this week to take to church in case they bring cow milk again. Honestly, this a.m. I thought if I threw both out she'd have nothing to eat but I shouild have borrowed some from another bag or something. I regret that now. :(

ETA: I was also wondering how a family of several people can have milk long enough to go sour? We can't keep ours stocked!

ETA?: Any formula would be an improvement right? I might go check Wags for the clearance low iron stuff. I never bought formula for my kids but know there's a huge variety.

[egoldber]

I guess I am having trouble wrapping my head around this. The father KNEW the milk was sour and still said to go ahead and feed it to the baby????

I would not feed their baby formula that they did not provide. A sudden change in diet, even if its nutritionally superior, could cause fairly severe gastrointestinal distress.

I know a lot of people who have switched their babies to cow's milk long before one year due to the expense. I think its a lot more common than many may realize.

[bubbaray]

OK, flame away, but if I knew for sure that a parent fed their child sour milk, I'd call Child Services. I have a problem with them feeding her cows milk at that age too, but not sure if I'd call Child Services for that alone. But, yeah, for the sour milk that they knowingly fed, I'd make that call. Without hesitation.

THat's nice of you to take formula for them for next week, but is that really a long term solution?

[srhs]

I don't think our nursery director would have any problem explaining to such parents that our volunteers could not be expected to feed a baby milk when it's not healthy, even though it's what they are requesting/providing themselves.

It is possible, though unlikely, that they don't *know* any better??? Maybe they were given bad advice??? It doesn't sound like Dad was embarrassed or even offered an explanation. Of course, they'd have to be talked to in a gentle way or else they'll just never come back to church but will continue to feed the baby milk at home. The goal is to make them understand about the milk and get the baby its nutrition!

And, yes, the church could certainly offer to provide formula supplies for the family if it's a financial hardship. I'm with the PP about not just giving the baby formula while in the nursery, though. You can't do that without their permission. What if baby reacted? And the milk habit needs to be nixed full time. Oh man, I hope this baby hasn't been on the milk this whole time?

[Wife_and_mommy]

I guess I am having trouble wrapping my head around this. The father KNEW the milk was sour and still said to go ahead and feed it to the baby????

I would not feed their baby formula that they did not provide. A sudden change in diet, even if its nutritionally superior, could cause fairly severe gastrointestinal distress.

I know a lot of people who have switched their babies to cow's milk long before one year due to the expense. I think its a lot more common than many may realize.

I can't say that I *know* because I didn't talk to him.

After the baby started the feeding, the feeder was questioning the contents. The other workers thought at first that the bottles were the 2yo's so called dad to ask. While they were talking to dad (when he said, yes, it's baby's), I made it clear the one bottle was sour and tossed it. They proceeded to feed the other bottle to baby and I had to leave.

I'm pretty sure it wasn't addressed when baby was picked up. I told the supervisor who said she'd discuss with the director.

I'm feeling really bad right now. It seems as it stands that baby will be drinking cow milk(sour or not) for the next week until the director says something, when/if she does.

I should have said something. :( I'm emailing the supervisor right now.

[Wife_and_mommy]

Flippin' UGH. So dad said it was formula, not milk. And even if it was, policy is it's their choice what they feed their child. She did say we can make sure not to give soured milk(Shall I add a duh?).

She went on to plug small groups and prayer.

I'm feeling powerless. If they show up next week with cow's milk, I'm supposed to sit idly by while someone knowingly feeds it to an infant? :32: This is where I feel my hands are tied if I start a ruckus. I've had situations before where my lack of restraint has caused bad feelings, etc. It's why I was so proud of myself for "only" throwing out the other bottle this a.m.

Katie, I'll wait until next week(when I sniff/taste again) to suggest WIC or similar. Our church gives out grocery gift cards instead of having a pantry. Thing is, I don't know how long that will help for or if they'd even use it for formula, yk?

Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.

I am going to pray that if it is cow milk, that they'll be open to me "mentioning" that it's not appropriate for infants. I can feign innocence on him being questioned today. Please pray for this baby's sake!

[gatorsmom]

OK, flame away, but if I knew for sure that a parent fed their child sour milk, I'd call Child Services. I have a problem with them feeding her cows milk at that age too, but not sure if I'd call Child Services for that alone. But, yeah, for the sour milk that they knowingly fed, I'd make that call. Without hesitation.

THat's nice of you to take formula for them for next week, but is that really a long term solution?

I have thought about this several times today and just assume the parent did not know the milk was sour. There has been plenty of times i couldnt' smell sour milk and drank it before smelling it. heck, one time DH gave Gator a bottle of sour breast milk. I had been meaning to throw it out but he used it before I did. He had no idea. Of course, that doesn't excuse the fact that cow's milk is not appropriate for a baby.

I'm not intending to flame you, bubbaray, but I'd say that if the baby looked otherwise healthy and wellcared for, I would NOT call already-overworked Child services. Maybe these people were just stupid and need some help. (oh, just reread your post). Yeah, if they KNEW the milk was sour and couldn't be reasoned with, or brought the baby to the nursery again with sour milk, hmm I might have to agree with you. Call Child services.

[WatchingThemGrow]

So, is there a chance that they put a bottle in for the day and didn't see to remove an expired one from the bag, like from last Sunday? I've done that before and DH could've just been unknowingly - from a distance - just going "yeah, feed that one."

Maybe a different formula? They're all a little different, right?

[Wife_and_mommy]

So, is there a chance that they put a bottle in for the day and didn't see to remove an expired one from the bag, like from last Sunday? I've done that before and DH could've just been unknowingly - from a distance - just going "yeah, feed that one."

Maybe a different formula? They're all a little different, right?

So let's hope I was hopelessly mistaken and it was formula....

[AngelaS]

If it was sour, throw it out. Assume the best and assume that they didn't know it was sour. Oops. We all make mistakes.

As far as if they're feeding the baby cow's milk vs. formula--isn't that their choice? Sure, we know it's not the best thing but for whatever reason this is what they're feeding their baby. Baby's not sick, doesn't have chronic diarrhea? Sounds like she's doing fine. For all you know, it's goat's milk because perhaps their baby's allergic to formula.

It's nothing I would make a huge deal over and risk alienating them or driving them away.

Frankly, I'd let it go and assume it's goat's milk and that this happy healthy thriving baby is going to be just fine. So someone accidently put sour milk in today's bottle--oops, they were rushing to church and grabbed an old jug. It happens to us all, if only we'd admit it.

[jal]

My first comment would be how do we know for sure this was sour cow's milk? I've smelled and even tasted some of the formula we feed our sons (on of the Enfimil powdered formula) and I remember that stuff being pretty naucious to my senses (and I'm talking freashly made formula). Is it possible they are using formula but that for what ever reason it too has a terrible odor, worst than "name-brand" formulas? Otherwise, I would have to admit that I don't know what trutly sour milk smells or tastes like. In our house, it gets thrown out well before then.


...I'll buy some formula this week to take to church in case they bring cow milk again...

That sounds like a H U G E mistake. As worded and in contexts of what's going on, it sounds like your plan is that if the parent brings in sour milk next week, you are going to throw out the milk and replace it with formula... that you picked out... not knowing this babies medical history or allergy reactions... behind the parents back???

Now if your plan is to have formula on hand that you can offer, that's fine. But to feed a baby something without the parents permission sounds like the stage for trouble.

[janeybwild]

I'm feeling powerless. If they show up next week with cow's milk, I'm supposed to sit idly by while someone knowingly feeds it to an infant? :32: T
I really really hope that this is just a case of misunderstanding between you all. Perhaps the DH initially said yes it was cow’s milk because in his head it is cow based formula, and he spoke without thinking. I have several friends who refer to formula as milk. I know that some formulas smell nasty, so perhaps it wasn’t actually sour. The fact that the baby looked like she was thriving is good right? I can see why you are concerned, and understand it. But, can you honestly say that you know what the formula they are using smells like? Is it possible to take this down a notch and try to do some gentle probing before throwing out the bottle if it smells bad next week? A while back, someone here suggested posting the anti-bitch in situations like this where you feel your blood boiling, as a way to calm the situation down and see the other side of it. In that spirit, here is the anti-bitch:

“I cannot friggin believe it. I just had a mommy drive by, at my church no less! A worker in the nursery took it upon herself to throw out my baby’s bottle of milk. I had a spare but that’s not the point. She assumed (incorrectly of course) that it was cow’s milk, because she said it smelt bad, like spoilt milk. Who feeds a 2 month old baby cow’s milk? Ugh, I cannot believe that someone would do this without at least trying to talk to me first. I’m so upset I’m going to e-mail the nursery director right now.”

[Wife_and_mommy]

If it was sour, throw it out. Assume the best and assume that they didn't know it was sour. Oops. We all make mistakes.

As far as if they're feeding the baby cow's milk vs. formula--isn't that their choice? Sure, we know it's not the best thing but for whatever reason this is what they're feeding their baby. Baby's not sick, doesn't have chronic diarrhea? Sounds like she's doing fine. For all you know, it's goat's milk because perhaps their baby's allergic to formula.

It's nothing I would make a huge deal over and risk alienating them or driving them away.

Frankly, I'd let it go and assume it's goat's milk and that this happy healthy thriving baby is going to be just fine. So someone accidently put sour milk in today's bottle--oops, they were rushing to church and grabbed an old jug. It happens to us all, if only we'd admit it.

Thanks for this level-headed post! After taking a step back, this is pretty much all there is to do.

[Wife_and_mommy]

I just planned on having it to offer. Wasn't going to feed it unbeknownst to the parents.

It doesn't matter at this point since I know the dad said it's formula but I knew it was soured by the strong urge to vomit I and a couple others had. Formula isn't pleasant smelling but this wasn't just stinky. It was *foul*. Someone actually tasted a drop on her wrist and said it was cow mik.

I hadn't considered that it might be goat milk as a PP mentioned. Is there such a thing as goat-based formula?The baby does look healthy so I will use my self control. At this point, all I/others can do is call the parents if the bottle smells foul again.

Thanks for all your responses. It helped me to process without getting myself into trouble.:)