Interesting article...ADHD and our boys education

[daisy1234]

http://www.newsweek.com/id/157898

This is interesting. I am one of those parents worried about behavior at times. Especially this week studying his first grade spelling words...it has been like pulling teeth. I sometimes wonder if pushing our kids is having a negative effect. Any thoughts?

[brittone2]

I think there are many contributing factors to ADHD, etc. in our society, and I think we really only understand a small portion of them.

My DS is a pretty calm 4.5 year old (as 4.5 year old boys go). However, we plan to homeschool. I personally just don't believe that sitting at a desk and having the demands of academics pushed on young children is healthy, whether it contributes to ADHD diagnoses or not. My own reading and research leads me to believe that there are actually advantages to delaying formal academics. There are so many ways to learn that don't require formal academic instruction. I'm also not convinced that starting "early" with young children is all that advantageous.

If I wrote what I really thought, we'd be here all night. This is a topic that interests me deeply. Thanks for sharing the article.

[lizajane]

my child has a mental heath problem that may or may not be the cause of some of his ADHD like behavior. we are working on controlling his anxiety from the first issue before we diagnose the secondary problem- ADHD behavior. so... i hear ya.

the first thing i did as a parent was make sure his elementary was THE BEST place HE could be. my own child, not just any child. my base school is a great place. but did not appear to be great for MY kid. so i applied to the magnet program and got into a school that focuses on arts and sciences, his favorite things. at this school, as opposed to the other, he will have more active classes (dance, drama, etc), more time out of his homeroom classroom (movement from one class to the next, change of scenery, different teachers) and the opportunity to do more "intensive" study in his two favorite subjects- art and science. also, they teach subject matter with the electives, not just in language arts class or math class. this past week, they used art to learn about patterns, which they also learned in their homeroom class. so "math" was spread out among more than one class and was disguised as art. ;) i think our obligations as parents of particularly active kids, not just boys, include finding the most appropriate setting for learning. for brittone, that is home. for me, that was a "Creative" minded school. for another, it might be montessori or private school where there are smaller groups.

so far, schuyler has been very tired at school. he complains about being too tired to go in the morning and school being too tiring. however, he is very physically active when he gets home from school. so while his mind is tired, his body just can't stop. i have to work to get him to rest and relax so that we can have an appropriate bedtime and not any adrenaline-inducing play before bed.

and, so far, he has had a happy face on his behavior report every day. his teacher was informed by his therapist of his issue. so she is prepared to work with him at his level, not just of any 5 year old boy. and i am sure that helps. (i got a great feeling about her, too.) so again, we searched for the best teacher by informing the school of what to expect so that they could consider which class might be best suited for him. we didn't have to "go into all that" with the school as i felt the teacher assigned was a good fit, whether or not they did it "on purpose."

so there is my experience with the matter. we will just have to see what happens as he gets farther into the year and into his elementary years. but so far, i feel really good about these intentional choices we have made for our potentially ADHD kid. and what it comes down to is that if i MUST homeschool him for his own sake, i will. i am just selfish and i don't want to unless it is truly what he needs.

[jessejo28]

Hi all, I find this topic very important and think it is not being looked at enough. It may have a lot to do with crime rates, marriage longevity or a whole slew of other issues we have today. As a speech therapist, I see boys medicated often for what I feel are normal male behaviors. Boys are boys and 50 years ago that was respected. Think about Christmas Story movie. Boys could like to shoot things, get dirty playin in the mud, and just generally run off their boundless energy. Now many educators and parents call that ADHD. I absolutely believe that ADHA is a valid diagnosis, but it may be overapplied by people who don;t have the time or desire to interact with boys the way they need. Schools are cutting back on recess, parents are reasonably scared to let them play outside, etc. Plus we are so harried now, gotta go, gotta be busy. It goes to a more macro change in society, men cannot be men either. They must be sensative and emotional and aren;t supposed to hunt, fish, and work on the cars. I work with babies up to adults and I have observed many an infant boy laugh at his own burps while less girls find that funny. It just seems that some things are boy things and some are girl things and girl things may be more likely to help one get by in school. Again I definiety think ADHD is a true diagnosis and can be helped by interventions. Sorry if I sound preachy, I have felt strongly about this for some time, but now I have a newborn son and it means so much more now. I hope my sons knows it is ok to cry and share but if he wants to run off some energy then go! Let's make mud baths together! J

[jessejo28]

so there is my experience with the matter. we will just have to see what happens as he gets farther into the year and into his elementary years. but so far, i feel really good about these intentional choices we have made for our potentially ADHD kid. and what it comes down to is that if i MUST homeschool him for his own sake, i will. i am just selfish and i don't want to unless it is truly what he needs.

Lizajane, I don;t think it is selfish to not homeschool unless it is necessary. It sounds like you are looking at everything you can to help your son do his best and if all parents gave it that much thought and attention, our educational system would be better and so would our kids. Good for you!! Remember the squeaky wheel gets the grease! :applause:

[brittone2]

Lizajane, I don;t think it is selfish to not homeschool unless it is necessary. It sounds like you are looking at everything you can to help your son do his best and if all parents gave it that much thought and attention, our educational system would be better and so would our kids. Good for you!! Remember the squeaky wheel gets the grease! :applause:

Can I give a :yeahthat:

I didn't mean to imply homeschooling is the right fit for every child/family. This topic is one reason among many reasons why I'm interested in HSing. I certainly think there are some creative alternatives available to many families that aren't interested in HSing.

You've done so much to smooth the way for your DS, LIza :)

[daisy1234]

Great input ladies. I really sometimes feel that I don't have a lot of choices with my son's education. I would love a more creatives school and we just don't have one close by...yours in NC sounds really great! Private school is out because it is too expensive. HS...I have to say I am not sure I could handle that unless absolutely necessary. We have been having some issues for awhile...so far in school he is doing fine...first grade seems very academic here in Pa. I am going to give this year a try as my son did well in K. We are trying to limit other activities because it is too much. We sighed up for soccer this year and we switched to big boy soccer...2 nights a week. He says he loves it but he really has a hard time paying attention to the coach and keeping his hands off the other kids. He is so good at school all day and I think he is done by 4 pm! Soccer is 6-7:30. We are going to try another week or so. I just wish I would have signed him up for another season of 4-6 year soccer...it was 1 time/week for 1 hour and no behavior issues or high blood pressure on me and dh! Aggghhh....Parenting is definately my toughest job when things aren't going smooth but thank goodness we have those great times with our little ones to make it a bit easier some days! :)

[lizajane]

Can I give a :yeahthat:

I didn't mean to imply homeschooling is the right fit for every child/family. This topic is one reason among many reasons why I'm interested in HSing. I certainly think there are some creative alternatives available to many families that aren't interested in HSing.

You've done so much to smooth the way for your DS, LIza :)

i definitely didn't think you meant to say homeschooling was "better!" just wanted to be sure you know that i think you are making a great choice and i am making a great choice and yay everyone. :)