Would going on a vacation with an 8 month old REALLY be vacation

[TraciG]

I don't think so ! I think it would be MORE stressful, am I the only one to think this ? My SIL want's to go on a family vacation for 4 day's to South Beach Fla. next month, she found a good deal. I also have an almost 5 year old . I have NO DESIRE to go but she's pushing it. She say's her mother & sister will go & can help. How do you have a vacation when you have a baby that is on a schedule, home for his 3 nap's ! Ok on weekend's he's out usually for the second nap but in the car at least sleeping !!

I didn't even take my DD on vaction until she was about 2 1/2 or 3 I forget .

I HATE feeling pressured, maybe this should be in bitching !

[Radosti]

We took DS to Cancun when he was 9mo. He did great! We brought his Peg Perego P3 stroller and would lay it flat and he'd nap in it while we were out.

[cmo]

With kids under 5, it's not a vacation, it's a TRIP! :-)

[bubbaray]

I think any "vacation" with under-schoolage children is NOT a vacation, but the usual childcare work in a sunny locale. It only should be classified as a vacation if you have a nanny/sitter/willing family member along to look after the children while you go out and relax (day or night or both).

JMHO.

[Melaine]

With kids under 5, it's not a vacation, it's a TRIP! :-)

Exactly. I think for me, I've had to re-write my definitions of lots of terms including: date, exercise, shower, late-night, meal....lol....
Trips can be fun, but they aren't the same as vacation. I might still consider going if I were you, but realizing that it won't be relaxing. Who knows maybe they might really help out enough for you to get a short break though

[KrisM]

I think it really depends on the kid. We're taking a 3 day vacation next month and the kids will be 4.5, 2.5, and 4 months. Just DH and I for adults and I'm really looking forward to it.

DS2's first vacation was at 5 weeks and we spent a week up north at my parent's cottage (not with my parents). It was a lot of fun.

I think it might be harder with other people there, as you'd be "expected" to do things with them. With just the family, you can more easily schedule around naps, etc.

When DD was 5 months, we drove 15 hours to visit family. We are NOT doing that this year! Way too long in a car with 2 kids and 1 that young.

So, it really depends. But, if you don't want to go and don't think you would enjoy it, stay home.

[wellyes]

If she, her sister and her mother have been helpful in the past, I'd go! Take advantage of any help they offer. And, if you're at a resort, maybe they'll have onsite childcare?

If not, then politely decline and wish them all a good trip.

[C99]

I think any vacation w/ kids w/o another (non spouse) caregiver to go along for the ride is not a vacation. It's just more work for mom in a foreign location.

[Asianmommy]

Travelling with little ones can be exciting & lots of fun, but it's also a ton of work and pretty exhausting. We went on lots of trips with the kids from age 4 months and up because we had to--for weddings, christenings, and other special events, and for just plain visiting our close relatives. Yes, it was fun. & yes, it was stressful. But we wanted to go and we found it was worth doing.

[MommyAllison]

We went on vacation with DD at 8 months, and just took one with both the kids when DS was 4.5 months. Both were wonderful and I'm very glad we went - but neither of my kids were on strict schedules. If you don't want to go, I wouldn't go.

[new_mommy25]

I would go in a heartbeat but my family loves to travel. Good luck with your decision.

[egoldber]

I would also go, but we also love to travel. Traveling with Amy is a lot more stressful than it was with Sarah, but I'm just not willing to not go anywhere for years. But this is coming from someone who is leaving next week for an extended family trip to WDW that includes 5 children, 4 of which are 2 and under. :)

Your perspective may different of course and that is your right. I wouldn't let someone pressure you into doing somethign you don't want to do.

[maestramommy]

Like Katie says, depends on the kid. Depends on how well they sleep outside of home, how well they roll with things. In your case, if you're dreading it, I wouldn't go. Of course, you'll want to factor in how dependable your ILs will be at helping you out. If it's "helping" or HELPING. :wink2:

[o_mom]

I found that adjusting my expectations made it a good time, if not a "vacation". One non-negotiable for us at that age was a 2 BR suite. I did not want to go to bed at 7:30pm when the kids did. For me, I brought a stack of books and knitting projects for nap and bed times. DH took the older ones during nap time and I would read/rest/knit in the room. At bed time DH would help get them down and then he went out with his family most nights, but I insisted that I get a night out myself. It was actually quite nice to be able to sit and read guilt-free. No dishes in the sink, no bathrooms that needed cleaned. No meals to prepare.

If you think they can understand that you won't be able to go out and party and that meals need to be at kid-friendly places and at kid-friendly times, then it might work. If they are just going to give you grief for not taking the kids out clubbing, then stay home. :)

[TraciG]

Thanks. we'll see what happen's tomorrow night at my MIL's house. My SIL say's we'll talk about it there, she said she isn't taking no for an answer. She has a baby too he's 5 1/2 month's old BUT much more easy going then my 8 month old & he's not on a schedule .

I would MUCH rather go with ONLY my family, NOT extended BUT not at this age, for me it would just be way to stressful ! It is VERY annoying to be pushed, CAN'T STAND it !

[ErinMC]

I found that adjusting my expectations made it a good time, if not a "vacation". One non-negotiable for us at that age was a 2 BR suite. I did not want to go to bed at 7:30pm when the kids did. For me, I brought a stack of books and knitting projects for nap and bed times.

I totally agree - it can be a lot of fun but you need to adjust your expectations. For me, with a husband who works 70-80 hours a week, I look at a vacation as time to see HIM, while we're with the kids. And yes, a sunny location helps. :-)

We took DS1 on a cruise at 6 months, and went to Hilton Head when DS1 was 2 and DS2 3 months. Yes, it's a lot of work but can still be fun. And I second the suggestion to get a suite, if possible, or at least adjoining rooms with your SIL. That way the kids can go to sleep in one room at 7:30, while ou watch tv, read, just chat in the other room until you go to sleep.

Good luck with your decision!

[boolady]

My SIL say's we'll talk about it there, she said she isn't taking no for an answer. She has a baby too he's 5 1/2 month's old BUT much more easy going then my 8 month old & he's not on a schedule .

I would MUCH rather go with ONLY my family, NOT extended BUT not at this age, for me it would just be way to stressful ! It is VERY annoying to be pushed, CAN'T STAND it !

We took DD on a 4-day trip when she was about 7 months old, and had a good time; but, it sounds to me like the real issue is that you don't want to go with your SIL. If that's the case, then don't go, because if you don't want to be with the other people on the trip, it doesn't sound like too much fun.

[DietCokeLover]

We took DD on our vacation when she was 8 mos and we had a wonderful time. (I was even 6 mos pregnant at the time). We had to think through some of the things while we did on vacation - making sure that it was a stroller friendly activity or place, but we enjoyed the time thoroughly. DD slept really well in the car as we traveled (2 day trip to get where we were going). So glad we did it.

[TraciG]

yep part of the issue is that I DON'T want to go with my in-law's, they will ALWAY'S ask now that we have kid's the same age , aren't I lucky ! Not thrilled with my BIL & DH isn't either, meanwhile they're partner's !!!

[stefani]

It seems to me that you are not keen on going, therefore if I were you, I would stand my ground and not go.

I didn't t travel with DS until he was 7 months old and it was with DH and my in-laws. I traveled almost yearly now with him to Asia, alone (no other adults traveling with us), and while I have a good time, I also yearn for traveling alone, without DS. He is an excellent traveler, and of course older, but still...

So, your children won't miss much if they don't go on this vacation, and it is not your idea of a vacation, therefore just say No ;) .

Good luck!

[jk3]

I think that's a great age to travel with a baby. Prior to a year, it seemed easy but both of my kids were/are not on rigid schedules and will nap on the go. It obviously depends on your child's personality. I would go though!

[lmintzer]

I wouldn't find it a vacation with a baby. Like your son, my kiddos both very much needed to be in their cribs to nap. Nappingo on the go just didn't work. I found that people who had more flexible kids just didn't get it. Definitely stand your ground and don't go. It doesn't sound like it would be much fun.

(From the mom of a preschooler and a 2nd grader who still thinks twice about certain types of vacations.)

[TraciG]

YEP people with easy going baby's or napper's on the go DO NOT get it, my SIL's baby is easy, will sit alone in his car seat / snap & go & not complain, then there's my DS who I hold almost the whole time we're at the park unless he goes in the baby swing for a couple of minute's !

She tell's me to raise him tough ,he's a boy, not sure if she was kidding or not ( I hope kidding ) if he's not used to these thing's by now I don't think he ever will !

[mom2one]

I think my mom said it best once about traveling with kids, at least from a Mom's perspective. "A vacation is not a vacation, it is a change of scenery."

I love to travel, my kid does pretty great with travel, but it is a lot of work for the me (the Mom).

I would stay home, hire a sitter, and go out for a nice long dinner with your DH instead.

[spanannie]

We will be taking our 8 mo old, 4 and 6 year olds to Colorado for skiing in March. All of my kids have travelled young. It's not necessarily easy, but it's just how things are with kids. If you have no desire to go, though, I don't think you should.

FWIW, I'm trying to have my 3rd child go-along with whatever we're doing. I tried to schedule life around my 2nd DC's schedule, and she's still, at 4, extremely high maintanence. Our newest addition is just having to go with the flow, and I think she's super-easy because of it.

[TraciG]

Maybe I did make a mistake AGAIN, I do live my life around DS schedule, just like I did with my DD

[spanannie]

Maybe I did make a mistake AGAIN, I do live my life around DS schedule, just like I did with my DD

I didn't mean it that way. You are doing the best you can.

My 4 year old is impossible, so I know where you are coming from. She is a high maintenance baby and a high maintenance child. I just know that with her, I decided to hire a babysitter, so she could stay home and nap and I wouldn't disturb her. With DD2, I just wake her up to leave, or she doesn't get a nap period. I toyed with getting someone to be here with her in the afternoons, so she could sleep, but decided I wanted to keep her going with the flow. It's hard though. Kids do a lot better with a nap, but when there are 3 of them, they have to make compromises. Having DD2 has helped my DD1 somewhat, too. She's learning that she has to bend more, too, so that things can go well with everyone. Hang in there!

[JBaxter]

almost sounds like this may be another bitching post-- post.

Ive had 4 boys and we have always gone on vacations with them they all have oct or nov bdays and so that would make them 7-9months several times we drove from MD to FL.

Sounds like they want you to go if your little guy needs his nap then take him to nap.

If you dont want to go they tell them you dont think you can handle it and drop it.

I have never not gone on any trip because it might interfear with a nap schedule i just went back to the room and napped them.

[gatorsmom]

I think it depends on the child, where you are going, and what kind of help you will have/need. There are resorts where you can put your child in a camp or daycare that provides them with many fun activities and opportunities while the parents do their own thing. This allows you to get some free time to relax. And I would definitely consider that a worthwhile vacation. Or, if it's a vacation to a sightseeing-type place where the child could ride and nap in a stroller while you tour, then yeah, I think it could work.

I've taken our 3 and 1year old boys to Las Vegas by myself (DH was working long hours at a convention there so he only came back to the hotel late at night). We saw many animal exhibits, and lots of free shows and features. We all loved it. (and I didn't do any gambling or see any shows) I think it would be easier to travel with a smaller baby- one who naps longer.

I haven't read the other posts although I see there are a lot of them. I hope you got the answer you were looking for.

[kijip]

I think it is a FAMILY vacation. Which is a touch different than a vacation, but IMO still very much worthwhile and enjoyable. ;)

[niccig]

We've done a lot of traveling with DS. For me, it's not a vacation. We do go, but I'm strict about a couple of things - DS naps. He has to nap, and I would lie down with him to get to sleep, and I would sleep too. I would feed him before going to a restaurant. 2 bedrooms as DS wouldn't sleep with us in the room. Fridge for milk and snack.

Yes it caused some issues with IL's at a family wedding as we didn't share rooms as they wanted, but DH told them it was the only way for DS to sleep, and for me to sleep and that's what was needed. I also stayed back at nap time, so people could still do what they wanted. It did get in the way sometimes when SIL wanted to book something for everyone at 1pm, I would say I'm not going, but MIL insisted on changing the time to include everyone. I didn't ask for the change, I was willing to miss out.

DS is nearly 4 and now we don't need to be so strict. He can sleep in the same room (but having an extra room is so nice), he's better at restaurants and can skip or push a nap. So I can lighten up and vacations are more fun.

[TraciG]

this whole thing is causing tension with DH & I ! I WISH I could be easy going & be excited to go somewhere but instead I WORRY WORRY WORRY I think that now is REALLY the time for me to go have a check up & find out about med's , I need to calm down & relax. Guess I went off topic but this plus other thing's are starting to convince me !