How much do you spend on nieces/nephews for gifts?

[MamaKath]

I mean specifically holiday (Christmas, chanakah, etc)?

We don't see many of the nieces and nephews most of the year. At Christmas we see them and bring gifts. For dh's side of the family, we haven't seen them at birthdays (nor do we call or send cards) so *they* expect the gifts to be for both. I am lucky if I can swing close to what they seem to expect, the older ones never like what we get them anyway. :shrug: I gave a heads up through my mil that things are tight, we don't expect a lot. My sister's kids I see more often, so they will just get a Christmas gift, however they are also closer to my kids and apreciative of the gifts given.

I was wondering how others here are handling it this year. :)
TIA~

[bigsis]

For DH's nieces and nephews, we used to spend $20-25 per gift. But just like you, I feel like the older ones are so unappreciative. I asked my DH if it was ok for me to just give them $10 cash each this year. He said ok. So I'm going to go for that. I figured cash, even at $10, is going to be more likely to be used than anything--including gift cards.

[shawnandangel]

I spend about $20 on my nieces at Christmas. I would spend more, but my brother has four beautiful girls and it gets expensive quickly. They are ages
2mo, 2yr, 7yr, 8yrs. For the older girls I just ask my brother what they have been asking for that is around $20 and he tells me. This way it is a meaningful gift.

2mo - outfit from carters
2yr - fisherprice toy that makes noise
7yr - tinkerbell movie
8yr- kung fu panda movie

[almostamom]

I have 2 nephews on my side. We generally spend about $50-75 on each of them (double that when I was working). We see them every week and they are very much a part of our daily lives.

DH's nieces and nephews all live out of state. We're lucky if we see them once a year and it's always us going to see them. We send them each $25 for their birthdays. I still do this even though none of his sisters with children has ever remembered DS' birthday. We stopped sending Christmas gifts a few years ago. Gift giving caused a lot of arguments between DH and myself, so we finally agreed that he would decide what to do for his side of the family and I would decide for my side.

[Rainbows&Roses]

We only buy for the 2 young ones (6 and 2) on my side of the family and spend about $50 each.

[kijip]

I have spent as little as $10 and as much as $200. This year I did a big gift for my niece's b-day so I am doing a smaller gift for Christmas, thinking of spending no more than $40-50, which is about 1/2 of what I have spent on my own son.

At this point, I don't see my other three nieces and nephews (because I have a restraining order to protect my family from my brother and SIL which I still actually need apparently, ugh). Because of that, my husband and I just set a small sum aside for the kids every b-day/xmas/random months when we feel like it in accounts that are in our name. So if we ever reconnect with them, perhaps we can help them with their educations or traveling to visit us or something. If we don't reconnect with them, the money remains ours. When we were buying gifts for all 4 of our nieces and nephews, we spent about $20-50 each on toys, with $50 or so more each for clothes and books for the three kids whose parents we are estranged from now (since they really needed both and their parents never bought them anything halfway decent). We obviously never needed to do that for my niece from my younger brother, who is perhaps the most well clothed and well read tot ever born. It hurts that we had to cut the kids out of our day to day lives on account of their parents but opening ourselves up to identity theft and plenty of threats and erratic behavior from the parents was not feasible just to have a relationship with their kids. It's sad that all of our kids lose out on the family relationship because of the behavior of two adults.

Because that puts me down to just gifts for 1 niece and my brother just for 1 nephew (T), we tend to overdo it a bit for each other and we are each trying to reduce that a bit this year, mostly because we each recognize that they don't need all that much. I don't figure we will ever have more than 2 to buy for from my younger brother (new baby due in February) and I don't really plan on ever seeing my other 3 until they are young adults due to the risk posed to us by my older brother. I doubt my BIL will ever have children.

One idea when on a budget for nieces and nephews is to give them a family gift like food or a game or a family movie night. Another is to suggest a joint family activity in lieu of a present.

[momtoonegirl]

We usually spend $20-30 per child for Christmas gifts and the same for birthday gifts.

DH has 2 nephews (17 yrs old, 4 yrs old), and 2 nieces (8 yr old, 6 yr old), and I have 2 nieces (13 yrs old, 10 yrs old).

[CBB]

I only have 1 niece. We don't see her very often, at the most once a year. I usually mail order gifts $80 -100. This year she will be spending xmas with us. I'm spending $100 ($50 itune GC plus $50 cash) for my niece and $50 for my sister.

[KpbS]

I have started buying ornaments for DH's DNs. They older they get the harder it is to buy for them. Plus I never received any thankyous--notes or otherwise--or any mentioning of a gift received. I still buy for the little ones and spend anywhere from $5-$20 per gift.

[ellies mom]

I have two nephews (13, 14) and one niece (8). Normally, I spend $20-30 for Christmas gifts and an additional $10-20 for birthday gifts if I was too lazy to get their gifts out on time. They are all pretty easy to shop for but now that my nephews are hitting their teens, I'll probably start giving them gift cards or cash unless I find something extra super perfect.

[MontrealMum]

For my side (2 kids), it can vary, it really depends on if I see something that I think is great. Usually that's between $30-$50 per kid.

I will apologize in advance, I still have a lot of resentment about this...

On DH's side we have one nephew, now 14 years old. I used to spend alot of time (and probably money as well, but this isn't about that) to find really fun, cool, unique gifts. I asked a friend with a boy the same age, did research, went to lots of stores. And I have to admit I got the kid some really nice things. Did we ever get a thank-you? No. I don't mean written, and in the mail. I mean face-to-face, I am handing you a gift kid, you can look me in the eye when you snatch it from my hands. Oh, and you might try addressing me as "Aunt" once in a while too.

I continued to ignore this (in public - not when alone with DH!) for the sake of the family, and because he was a "child". But 1) DH has had a huge blow-up with SIL and 2) he's in highschool now.

So, last year and this year he got/will get a $25 gift card to a chain bookstore up here. He likes to read. He gets $20 to the same place for his birthday. Judging from the answers here, that amount is more than acceptable - but there's no way I'm wasting anymore time to be treated like that. Also, his parents have yet to give something that is either new, or useful, to DS. All we get are extremely well-used clothes that always arrive via the ILs well after they might have actually fit DS...or any other child based on the age on the tags.

I would say, set a limit that you can live with budgetwise, and get a g/c for a place you know they'd like to shop. That way, you haven't slighted them, but you don't have a lot emotionally invested in it either if they don't get excited or seem happy about what they've received.

[elephantmeg]

I have one nephew and we spend 20-40 for each b-day and x-mas. We are close, live close to each other and see each other a ton. I spent $35 I think on his first b-day present in Oct and am planning on about $30 for x-mas. DH has a cousin with kids and we spend closer to $15 for each of her 3 kids and give presents at b-days and xmas.

[s7714]

About $50-100 currently, but I only have one niece and one nephew, with another nephew due to arrive in December. If we had a large number of nieces and nephews I wouldn't spend that much, probably more along the lines of $20.

[elaineandmichaelsmommy]

I feel like such a cheapskate reading everyones replies. We have 1 nephew on dh's side. He's a sweet little boy and loves dd and ds like crazy. I have no problem spending upwards of $20 on him.

HOWEVER-on my side after this christmas we will have 10 nieces and nephews to buy for. We have a blended family on my side so my brother has 2 girls. My sister has a son. My other sis is expecting a boy in early jan. My stepbrother has 2 boys and a 16 year old dd who his wife had in her 1st marriage and sbro has legally adopted. My stepsis has a son and her live-in sometimes engaged to bf has a dd and ds from a previous marriage.

So I've taken full advantage of the board game sales this year. I got a lot of rainchecks at target for the $4 toddler games and will be looking for other great deals throughout the season. Last year I got all the kids really great gifts and then there was a bunch of personal fallout a couple of months downs the road.

Something I have to keep reminding myself about these children. They have so many people that they see during the holidays. And most of them feel obligated to give them a gift of somekind there is a high likelyhood that by the time i see them they're not going to remember what we got them becuase everything will be one big blur. They've all got way too much stuff to begin with so really- is a board game or a new box of crayons and coloring books really a bad thing. They're happy to have recieved something and it hasn't broken my wallet. I also take into consideration how close we are. Some of the children I'm expected to buy for I see 1-2 times a year and we aren't close. I don't see any reason to break the bank in that situation especially when they already have close friends and relatives buying for them and I'm pretty much aunt who? OOHhhh her.

I mean in the end I'm buying for 9 children all under the age of 8. They're happy to have just recieved a gift to open. And in return I don't expect the world for my kids. Just a gesture. Heck they'd be happy with their own $1 bill to spend at the dollar store. Dh's aunt sent each of the kids a dollar for their birthdays and dd was in orbit over getting her very own money!!!

I just have to remember this when I'm shopping.

[AngelaS]

$15 to $20.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I only have 2 so I spend $40/ each.

Beth

[Corie]

I have 4 nephews.

I spend $25 each for the birthday gifts and $25 each for
their Christmas gifts.

[WatchingThemGrow]

I'm getting the award for being the biggest cheapskate here this year. Money is tight. One tween niece kindly sent out her Christmas list via email in mid November - with links. I was so thankful I could actually get something for her she wanted and not just a GC to Limited Too sent to her house like last year. That just didn't feel right.

One of her wishes was at the BF sale at Target for $15, so I spent that on her (used to be $25 each year) and got something comparable for another niece. Her brother couldn't name anything, so I got him a $13 hat, a $9 hat for another nephew. And, since the other SIL openly admitted she doesn't look at the lists anyone else sends, I just picked up a PlayDoh kit for $6 on BF sale for one of her DC who gets a Word Whammer for her b'day a week before Christmas. So...$6 (with bd gift also) -$15 would be my answer this year.

It was funny, though, b/c the SIL I was shopping with got another niece from her side a Tag reader for $50, but was fine picking up the $6 doctor kit for my DD and $25 in Duplo boards for DS. I was totally fine with it b/c we don't need too many more toys ever, but it just shows that in every family (on every side) there are different standards of giving.

[specialp]

I think it depends on how many you have as well. We have 4 nieces and nephews.

$20 on Christmas gifts
$40 on Birthday gifts

[BeachBum]

I usually try to get something that is a $30 value--if I get a deal ---great! I have 4 to buy for, and we don't even see them 1x per year. They are all under 12.

[KBecks]

as little as $10 and $30 tops.

[hillview]

We only have 2 DNs so we spend about $100 on them at Christmas and bdays. We get lists and so does my sister so it works out well. I take their gifts into account when planning for DSs and so it seems like a good situation. We always buy what is on the list or offer ideas and let the other veto!
/hillary

[crayonblue]

About $15 per niece/nephew. We all got together and decided on this number for two reasons 1) so we were all spending about the same and 2) so Christmas is affordable.

If I find a $50 item on sale for $15, that counts too!

[annasmom]

We do a cousin swap.

Thank Goodness!! Because I have 16 nieces and nephews.

I still need to buy 5 gifts. I spend $20-$25 on the swap gifts (it is a set amount), and more on the non-swap gift (other side of the family).

[lablover]

On my side I have 2 kids to buy for. They are local and we see them all the time. I'm going to suggest a $30 cap this year. And I'm going to ask my 2siblings to only buy one gift for each of my children. Last year they both bought multiple gifts and combined with the gifts from my parents it just got totally out of hand, IMO. On DH's side there are 10 kids, ranging from 1 to early 20s. None are local and we don't exchange gifts unless we are getting together for the holidays.

[kayte]

This year we bought my niece and nephews a goat.... Really a goat--just not really for them. We bought it through Heifer International-- their Kids 2 Kids program. I bought these books to give them...

http://www.amazon.com/Beatrices-Goat-Page-McBrier/dp/0689869908/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1228142426&sr=8-1

http://www.amazon.com/Life-Like-Mine-DK-Publishing/dp/0756618037/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1228142486&sr=8-1

We spent about $150 total for them all. And honestly, I don't expect them to like the gift at all. But I am not going to contribute anymore to the over indulgence... And I don't mind spending $120 to help get another family on their feet.

Perhaps there is some charity you could find as a good fit and give to it in all the children's names--- or maybe even discuss the idea with them before hand and decide on the charity together.

[brittone2]

I'm admittedly cheap on this, however, I have 4 siblings and a huge family in general. Several of my brothers have blended families, so my oldest brother has 5 children (only 1 is biologically his) for example. I have 13 nieces and nephews to buy for on my side...none on DH's side (yet). We generally spend 10-15 on each. They are all preteens/teens for the most part now. I have one 3 year old niece, and one 10 year old, but the others are all teenagers now. Like many here, I no longer get thank you notes, etc. from about half of them. Actually, I get thank you notes from 4 of the 13.

They all prefer gift cards, which is easy, but at the same time, it makes it hard to buy an ornament or something on sale that would make 10-15 look like more.

DH is in grad school, and this is what we can afford right now. I don't spend a ton on my own kids either.

Once he's finished school I suspect we'll bump up to at least $20 for each, but for now, we are where we are.

eta: we spend about the same on birthdays.

[jgenie]

We don't live near either family. Neither family comes to visit us, but we visit once a year. My family is really good about clearing their calendars when we visit so we can spend as much time together as possible. DH's side not so much.

On my side we have two to buy for - usually spend $30 - $50 each for birthday & Christmas. They also get an Easter package every year about $40.

Dh's side - 9 to buy for - averages about $30 each for Christmas - no other gifts during the year.

[npace19147]

We have four nieces on my side and four nephews one niece on DH's side. In the past I have spent about $40 each for birthday and holidays.

However, with the kids getting older the lack of any kind of acknowledgment was really annoying me. For the most part other than the shipping info I would have no idea whether or not the gift even made it there, let alone if it was enjoyed or appreciated.

So, for birthdays I send cards and holidays will be about $20 - $25 each this year. They all get so much that whatever we send is barely a blip on the radar anyway!

[ThreeofUs]

We have a ton of DNs, at least on DH's side, and so we came up with a system.

Kids get presents each year, with "kids" being defined as the under 21 crowd. We spend about $15-25 for birthdays and a little less for Christmas.

Some people spend less, some a little more, but we all agree on it so it works. In that 1/2 of the family, "thank you" cards are a must, so we always feel like our gifts are appreciated.

On my side of the family, I have to call to even see if the gifts arrived, LOL. So I don't do as much shopping for them.

[jk3]

Niece: $40-50
Cousins' Kids: $15-25 each gift

[Bean606]

We only have one niece, and I spend about $50 on her. We used to buy for DH's young cousin, but never EVER got a thank you in person, or otherwise, so when she turned 13, I stopped.

[lizajane]

i don't think i really "count" because i only have one nephew and i can afford gifts most of the time and i can handmake gifts, too. so i spend $50-$100. but that includes little things like a christmas book before christmas, or an outfit i handsew. or a little tee shirt i grab on sale so that he will match mine, etc.

this year:

backpack, i monogrammed it with my own machine, $25
peter rabbit coin bank ($3)
garnet hill sweater on clearance last year $30
longall to match my kids' tees $35

[lizajane]

oh yeah, forgot a thought...

my poor single brother has to buy gifts for sister, BIL, me, DH (his other BIL), and THREE nephews.

SO NOT FAIR!!! i only buy for him, sis, BIL and nephew.

[maestramommy]

I *think* they've been somewhere in the $20-30 dollar range, but I'm not sure because Dh always buys the gifts for his neices. This year MIL asked everyone to keep the gifts to under $20. Sounds like a great idea. We asked for a $10 doll stroller for the kids.

[kedss]

Hi-

We are pretty tight with my nephew, and his birthday happens to be Dec 25, so we try to get him a good size gift and we check with his parents to make sure he needs/wants what we are planning. I guess it also depends on the age of the nieces and nephews, if on the older side, maybe a gift certificate somewhere like for Amazon?

[saschalicks]

I have two nephews and two nieces that are DH's brother's kids. I have always sent a gift for b-days and Hanukkah. I try to stick to the $25 each rule on both. Since they've never sent anything for my kids I figure I'm a big spender. :) I hope this year will be different.

ETA: I have 2 young cousins as well and I spend $25 on them too. I have officially decided to stop sending them b-day presents when I bought a doll house for her (more then $25) and never even heard a peep. I figure that since she didn't like it I won't do it again.

[MelissaTC]

I have 3 nephews and spend $25-$30 on birthdays and Christmas. This year, we are sending them a Step 2 Rumble Canyon table for all 3. I also have two tween/teen cousins and they get a $15 iTunes card for Christmas. They barely acknowledged gifts for awhile and DH wanted to cut them from the list but I just can't so there we go.

[kerridean]

Nothing. We all agreed to stop exchanging years ago. I love it.

[MontrealMum]

Thank you for starting this thread. I am really surprised at what is looking to be the average amount spent, and what is considered "normal". After having years of frustration with DN, and our recent conflicts with the parents I am not going to have any guilt at all in "readjusting" our spending habits. :yay: Thank you thank you thank you!

[Corie]

oh yeah, forgot a thought...

my poor single brother has to buy gifts for sister, BIL, me, DH (his other BIL), and THREE nephews.

SO NOT FAIR!!! i only buy for him, sis, BIL and nephew.



Yep, we all buy a gift for my single brother since he is stuck
buying birthday and Christmas gifts for 1 niece and 5 nephews.