Last straw with our public elem school!

[cdlamis]

This is a part b*itch but I also need feedback.

I have been frustrated with DDs elementary school- our school district is known for being mediocre (lack of consistency, poor/no advanced programs, etc). I have searched for alternatives and everything is either too far or too $$. I wouldn't mind driving but with the baby coming, I would rather stick it out next year.

So, I joined the PTO and vowed to be super involved with her education. Last Friday was the morning of my first PTO event and I was on a high and was really hopeful for this school. I was still at the school to hear the morning announcements and it opens with the song "Get Low" that I find very inappropriate for children. I stood there looking at the loudspeaker with my mouth hung wide open. I was in shock! The lyrics are probably above most 1st graders heads but I am SO annoyed that the school is trying to be cool and not at all concerned with values or sending the right message. Then a faculty member (DD says it was the principal) and starts going on about how what apple bottom jeans have to do with school spririt. I didn't get her correlation but it also didn't matter at this point.
*ETA- for those that don't know what apple bottom jeans are, they are jeans that accentuate and look good on an "apple bottom" butt. That's at least what I know it is.

I am calling in the AM to speak with the principal but at this point, I feel like this school is hopeless and there is only so much I can take.

Tell me that I am not overreacting. What would you do with a school like this? I am ready to jump ship all together! TIA!

*Edited to add the song lyrics. It is a popular song that I recognized but didn't know the artist or words. The only played the song up to the "low, low low" part since it gets worse after that.
[Chorus:]
Shawty had them Apple Bottom Jeans [Jeans]
Boots with the fur [With the fur]
The whole club was lookin at her
She hit the floor [She hit the floor]
Next thing you know
Shawty got low low low low low low low low
(http://www.metrolyrics.com/get-low-lyrics-flow-rida.html)

[egoldber]

Um, wow.

And since that's too short..... :32:

[SASM]

Uh...WOW! I'd definitely have an issue with this!! Also...(((hugs))) as I am also having issues with DS's elem school, as well. I'd definitely call and SPEAK with the principal. And...it's GREAT that you are involved with the PTO!

Good luck...and sorry you are having a bad elem experience.

[alexsmommy]

I'm sorry, but I do NOT think you are overreacting. I'm all for "reaching the kids" on their level, but I think there is an age appropriate way, non-sexualized way to do this. I would run, fast, from this school as soon as possible. If the principal is leading the charge for this type of behavior, I would not be holding out too much hope for change.
Wow.
Really, the mediocre issue, well, if every parent with means runs from mediocre schools then there is no one to lead the schools on a different path. I think that parents can do great things to change the academic environment of a school and to supplement at home. To me, that is a different issue than completely inappropriate music and language. Yet the combination of these two things speaks volumes...

[lorinick]

I think you need to go to the Superattend of the school. If after talking with the princapal. I wouldn't run for the hills. I live where I live and pay 8,000 a year in taxes to send my children to our schools. And I would fight to make it better.

[cdlamis]

Really, the mediocre issue, well, if every parent with means runs from mediocre schools then there is no one to lead the schools on a different path. I think that parents can do great things to change the academic environment of a school and to supplement at home. To me, that is a different issue than completely inappropriate music and language. Yet the combination of these two things speaks volumes...[/quote]

I completely agree with you. That's why I wanted to make our neighborhood school work for us. I feel like I have some good ideas and can contribute to the PTO. DH and I came up with some ideas to help DD if she wasn't being challenged enough next year. I also felt that getting involved would *maybe* help us get a good teacher next year. I agree 100% that running from a so-so school just leaves everyone else in the neighborhood with a so-so school. I was ready to start making a difference.
For example, the school is in need of a good recycling program and a better lunch schedule. These are things that may be hard for any school (maybe lack of time or faculty) and they would be happy to let a volunteer take over. These are things that I understand and am happy to let slide. BUT, this latest instance, is nothing I can change. Maybe I can make sure better songs are picked for announcements but I can't fix the mentality of the administration who thought it was ok in the first place.

Ugh! I am getting madder and madder now. :)

[lisams]

Wow.

I'm so sorry about the school search - I'm so there with you (the school Emma is currently going to stops at K). Either the tuition gets me, it's too far away or there's a "waiting list/lottery". Have you checked out Edu Prize? I know they also have a waiting list, but I don't know how long it is for 2nd grade.

Hopefully you'll be able to find a school you feel good about!

ETA that no I don't think you're overreacting at all. That song has no place in an elementary school. Any principal who thinks that is OK, and even worse thinks the song has something to do with school spirit is not the kind of person I would want leading my child's educational path.

[lorinick]

I think you should work with the school you have now. How does the school rate on the state and federal level? You could switch schools and hate things about that school too. Than what?

[Veronica's Mommy]

Don't even get me started on the post. I would be so upset! It's true, taking your child out of the school won't solve the problems.

I just wanted to let you know that the lyrics website you posted had a ton of popups, including the kind that looks like a warning message from your own computer but is really an ad trying to get you to download stuff. The kind that is hard to get rid of, where you can't even read the webpage without clicking on it & wind up downloading who knows what-- I had to just close the site so didn't even get to read the lyrics. But I'd heard the song before and got the gist. Just thought you might like to know about the website.

[CAM7]

...but I can't fix the mentality of the administration who thought it was ok in the first place.

Yuck. You are correct. It might be something that you just can't fix.

Would you consider homeschooling for a year or two until you can find a better school? You mentioned when the baby gets old enough you can drive dc to a better school?

[brittone2]

Yeah, that's inappropriate. We already are forcing kids to grow up too soon...it doesn't need to start w/ the sending of messages like *that* in elementary school :( I'm not a prude or whatever, but I'm very sensitive about that stuff in general when it comes to children.

We are planning to HS. I know that's not something many families will consider but that's what I feel comfortable with.

I would try escalating it to the next level (and I don't think it is overreacting...I don't think it would be overreacting all that much even if this was at a middle or highschool level, personally), but as you said, if there's a culture there of this, it may be hard to change the mindset, even if you change this *one* thing, kwim?

I'm sorry. I wish I had better advice...but I don't think you are overreacting. Blech.

[sste]

You aren't responsible for solving the school's problems, if you can afford to leave I would do it. Even if your school does change, which is a huge IF, change in any institution is very, very slow.

I think the real issue is the mediocre academic quality. Given that your time is precious, I might not even bother talking to the principal about the song; I would spend that time researching other school options.

I can see why the song bothers you. I guess I am not sure how I feel about sexual language in songs for children. I haven't thought it through. My initial take is at 5 or 6, I would assume the child wouldn't understand it and wouldn't particularly care. Older than that I think it would depend what KIND of sexual message the song was sending - - I think children have their own sexuality and we as a society are a little puritanical. So, my issue wouldn't be sex per se but if the song indicated to my daughter, as it sounds like that one does, that her butt should look a certain way so she receives love, attention, affection, well then I would be ROYALLY PISSED!

[cdlamis]

[/quote] I just wanted to let you know that the lyrics website you posted had a ton of popups, including the kind that looks like a warning message from your own computer but is really an ad trying to get you to download stuff. The kind that is hard to get rid of, where you can't even read the webpage without clicking on it & wind up downloading who knows what-- I had to just close the site so didn't even get to read the lyrics. But I'd heard the song before and got the gist. Just thought you might like to know about the website.[/quote]

Thanks for the headsup! I removed the link and just posted the lyrics in my text. Hope it didn't affect anyone.

[AngelaS]

I'd be livid. I'm homeschooling so obviously, I'm biased, but wow.

And as for investing in the neighborhood schools, imho unless the public schools see declining numbers because people are paying for private schools or homeschooling, they're not going to get better.

[Zansu]

Honestly, I'd just call Tom Horne's office directly. He's still in office, isn't he? That is completely inappropriate and unacceptable, and a huge hammer needs to come down on that principal.

[Asianmommy]

Agreed. That song doesn't seem appropriate for a grade school.

[JustMe]

That song is completely inappropriate for an elem. school, IMHO. I would be livid as well. I mean, its hard enough (impossible) to prevent what kids will get from their peers, but from morning announcments....I'm sorry, but I think I would be finding another option, whatever it is...as far as calling the principal or anyone else higher up, I guess it wouldn't hurt, but I would be concerned about the administration's on-going judgment issues on all sorts of things.

[s_gosney]

WOW. That is just nuts. I too would be livid. I think calling the principal and chatting about it is in order. I think before I called that I would try to convince myself that perhaps the principal is just naive and doesn't know the meaning of the song, and just ask an open-ended question about what they were hoping the kids would get from the song and little pep-talk about apple jeans....
I remember when you posted before about the recycling and lunch issues and I (among others) urged you to try and "be the change." I must say though, that now that I am facing the reality of putting my dd in public schools, I am really conflicted. I agree with Lisa to look into edu-prize. I visited there last week and was impressed. They do a lottery, so there's a chance you could get in, though I don't know that you could get in mid-year, if that's what you're wanting. They opened the second campus in Queen Creek (if that's not too far) which may be in less demand (?). If homeschooling is something you'd consider, there's that whole online homeschooling thing, but I don't know anything about it at all.
I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Hugs to you and do update us, please!

[KpbS]

I'm sorry, but I do NOT think you are overreacting. I'm all for "reaching the kids" on their level, but I think there is an age appropriate way, non-sexualized way to do this. I would run, fast, from this school as soon as possible. .

:yeahthat:

This is pretty much my thoughts exactly but I have a very low tolerance of people--esp. those in positions of authority--undercutting the morals and values I am trying to teach my children.

[kijip]

wtf?! I would be so upset about this. I don't think you are overreacting at all.

If that has anything to do with school spirit, my name is Donald Duck.

[swrc00]

As a public school teacher, I hate hearing things like this. However, I am not surprised to hear of your experience. My advice to you is skip the phone call. I would show up in the morning demanding a meeting with the principal and also make a call to the super. Good Luck!

[Veronica's Mommy]

If nothing else works... I would call the local TV news. You never know. Letter to the newspaper editor maybe.

[gatorsmom]

I"m horrified. I don't mean to sound so dramatic, but I don't think you were overreacting when your mouth fell open.

Who is it in the school system that decides to play inappropriate music over the loud speaker to little children who are vulnerable to this kind of crap? Who makes that judgment call? Is that the principal? Is everyone else close to him/her (although I'd be surprised if you said a female was advocating a song like that. sorry to be stereotypical) agreeing with that decision? I'd start talking to other parents in the school as well as staff members, teachers, etc., and try to get a response. Is everyone ok with this? You shouldn't have to run this crusade by yourself.

I absolutely am impressed that you are trying to work with the school and change it for the better. I think if you start asking the right people the right questions repeatedly, you can make a change. Hopefully you can get some other like-minded parents to work with you on this. If there are really no acceptable alternatives, I think I'd go the homeschool route. I absolutely wouldn't want my daughter going to a school with an attitude like that. What does this tell our daughters about their worth????? so sad.

ETA: I just wanted to encourage you to keep on trying to make a change. I"m working on making a change at our church (well, I was before the twins arrived and took up all my time). It's an uphill battle and is seeing a setback can be very discouraging, but I am starting to see some progress and finding other like-minded parents. So, it is possible.

[wellyes]

This is pretty much my thoughts exactly but I have a very low tolerance of people--esp. those in positions of authority--undercutting the morals and values I am trying to teach my children.

In what way does this song undercut children's morals and values? I'm obviously in the minority here, but I just don't see what is so objectionable about this song.


*Edited to add the song lyrics. It is a popular song that I recognized but didn't know the artist or words. The only played the song up to the "low, low low" part since it gets worse after that.

Shawty had them Apple Bottom Jeans [Jeans]
Boots with the fur [With the fur]
The whole club was lookin at her
She hit the floor [She hit the floor]
Next thing you know
Shawty got low low low low low low low low

Translation: a good-looking woman in a trendy outfit danced in a club. That's it. The second verse has a line about a woman giving her (own) "big booty a slap".... which is a pretty standard dance move, but I can see why the school didn't play that verse. But the verse above seems harmless to me. Unless you just do not want hip-hop played to children?

And I have to ask, if you didn't even know the words, why did you think this song was harmful?

[JTsMom]

In what way does this song undercut children's morals and values? I'm obviously in the minority here, but I just don't see what is so objectionable about this song.



Translation: a good-looking woman in a trendy outfit danced in a club. That's it. The second verse has a line about a woman giving her (own) "big booty a slap".... which is a pretty standard dance move, but I can see why the school didn't play that verse. But the verse above seems harmless to me. Unless you just do not want hip-hop played to children?

And I have to ask, if you didn't even know the words, why did you think this song was harmful?

Even if you're ok with a song about a woman's apple shaped booty, how about the part about working the stripper pole and drinking? I realize they didn't play that part, but playing even part of the song in school makes it seem as though that type of music is appropriate for 5 yr olds, which I couldn't disagree with more. It wouldn't be any different than playing the opening scene of a porno that didn't have the actual sex part in it imo.

OP, my mouth would have been on the ground if I had heard that, or if my child had come home singing it.

I wasn't familiar with this song before this post, so I googled it.
Here's one of the hits I got.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4PGB8x46P-A

I don't know what is going on with our schools. I'm the last person you'd call a prude. I have no problem with sex ed in schools. I believe in teaching kids the proper names for their body parts. I'm even all for handing out condoms in HS. To me, playing this song during the morning announcements in elementary school is a whole different ballgame!

ETA: By "that type of music" I don't mean hip hop, I mean any type of music referring to stripping/drinking/etc

[lisams]

I wasn't familiar with this song before this post, so I googled it.
Here's one of the hits I got.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4PGB8x46P-A


How can parents and faculty be OK with this?

Saying a little prayer that DD chooses to be in the marching band and not on the cheer squad!

[TonFirst]

To me, that playing that song over the loudspeaker during morning announcements is a problem because the lyrics are completely age-inappropriate. Grade-school kids don't need to hear music about hot women in trendy jeans dancing at a club. That song is totally irrelevant to any public elementary school's mission.

I mean, christ on a cracker, "that's what I told her, her legs on my shoulder," and "I had to fold her like a pornography poster," and, let's not overlook, "yeah, she was worth the money."

Translation: He's screwing a good-looking woman in the fashion that one might see in a Penthouse centerfold, and she's essentially a prostitute, who is worth, I believe the song notes, $3,000. Did I get all that right?

Pretty Woman, indeed!

Yes, those lyrics weren't played, but they're in the song, and I can't see how, since the song includes those lyrics, it is in any way appropriate to play to a bunch of elementary school children, no more than it would be to play "I've Got Friends in Low Places," or "Afternoon Delight."

[JTsMom]

Don't forget this one:

"She ready for Rover, I couldn't control her" Consult the urban dictionary if you need a definition.

[brittone2]

To me, that playing that song over the loudspeaker during morning announcements is a problem because the lyrics are completely age-inappropriate. Grade-school kids don't need to hear music about hot women in trendy jeans dancing at a club. That song is totally irrelevant to any public elementary school's mission.

I mean, christ on a cracker, "that's what I told her, her legs on my shoulder," and "I had to fold her like a pornography poster," and, let's not overlook, "yeah, she was worth the money."

Translation: He's screwing a good-looking woman in the fashion that one might see in a Penthouse centerfold, and she's essentially a prostitute, who is worth, I believe the song notes, $3,000. Did I get all that right?

Pretty Woman, indeed!

Yes, those lyrics weren't played, but they're in the song, and I can't see how, since the song includes those lyrics, it is in any way appropriate to play to a bunch of elementary school children, no more than it would be to play "I've Got Friends in Low Places," or "Afternoon Delight."
nak-
ITA. and there probably are kids in school that do know the rest of the lyrics, because they are allowed to listen, or have siblings or parents that lislten, etc.
I'm definitely not a prude about sexuality, but the message of that song is not appropriate for little ones, IMO. If a family decides to listen to it in their own home (much like the thread on Spongebob being shown to Kindy kids...I'm okay with some parents deciding that's okay with them at home, but I'm not okay with the school sending that/those messages. At all). And I don't see any up side to that...kwim? There are a zillion age appropriate ways (and songs!) that could have been used instead.
I'm sure there are kids in that school filling other kids in on the rest of the lyrics, which they probably know from older silbings, parents, etc. While that might happen anyway, I don't think we need the school reinforcing that a song like that is "cool" or age-appropriate. It just isn't the right message for little ones, IMO. And I see absolutely no positive side to the equation, vs. some other more controversial decisions schools might make.

The thing with getting something like this reconciled is that it wasn't just the decision of one teacher or whatever in one class. IF it is going on over the loudspeaker and no one raised concerns, it says a lot to me about the culture of that school and what is acceptable there. I think lots of schools have one random teacher who does one random stupid thing here and there, but the whole administration and teaching staff has to be aware that the song was used and they didn't have a problem with it? I know not everyone would know the rest of the lyrics, but still..

[CAM7]

Yes, those lyrics weren't played, but they're in the song, and I can't see how, since the song includes those lyrics, it is in any way appropriate to play to a bunch of elementary school children, no more than it would be to play "I've Got Friends in Low Places," or "Afternoon Delight."

...or how about "Milkshake"...after all...isn't it just about a nice young girl running a small ice cream business?


...My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard,
and there like,
it's better than yours...

[Sillygirl]

ITA with the PP who are appalled. Also, I think Apple Bottom Jeans are a pretty expensive brand. Were they supposed to go out and buy this brand of jeans to show their school spirit? Did the jeans company get involved in the school as a way to promote their brand? Questions I hope the OP has a chance to ask in her meeting with the prinicpal!

[Emmas Mom]

Yikes! Wow, and here I was lamenting our move from Gilbert! I mean, yeah I'd still rather be back there but I would be having issues with that too. :hug:

[cdlamis]

[/quote] Yes, those lyrics weren't played, but they're in the song, and I can't see how, since the song includes those lyrics, it is in any way appropriate to play to a bunch of elementary school children, no more than it would be to play "I've Got Friends in Low Places," or "Afternoon Delight."[/quote]

I have heard the song on the radio before and started to change the station (just because I don't care for the song- didn't really even know what it said) and DD said "No, keep it there- I like that song". Not to make the story even more complicated but she has heard it before in school since her 1st grade class shares the gym with the 8th grade dance class (only a partition divided the gym) and they always had that song on. I did mention it to the principal way back then- she said she would mention it to the dance teacher. It wasn't that big of a deal to me since the song was being played for the 8th graders. I didn't want it happening all the time but I wasn't horrified since I could see how it could happen.

My point is that my DD now thinks that song is cool and something that bigger kids listen to. So, even though the school didn't play the rest of the song- my DD now thinks she likes it and should like it. Ugh!!

[cdlamis]

Yikes! Wow, and here I was lamenting our move from Gilbert! I mean, yeah I'd still rather be back there but I would be having issues with that too. :hug:

No joke! Gilbert is pretty conservative (way more than I am) so I am shocked that this was allowed in the first place. We are in the Higley school district (you were too, right?).

[cdlamis]

I just wanted to thank everyone for their comments and suggestions. DH always thinks I should stick it out and that I tend to over analyze everything (which is true). So, I am grateful to see that I am not alone. I have an appt to see the principal (a woman!) on Monday morning. At this point, there is not much she can say that will explain or diminish this incident. This is not a case of poor planning or lack of resources/$. This is truly a sign of poor administration which I feel there is not much I can do about.

[TonFirst]

Dude. It's even *less* appropriate - if that's even possible - for 8th grade girls, who are sexualized enough as it is - now they have to hear they're worth $3K in their public school?

[lovin2shop]

Dude. It's even *less* appropriate - if that's even possible - for 8th grade girls, who are sexualized enough as it is - now they have to hear they're worth $3K in their public school?

Oh my, I agree, that is even worse since the 8th graders surely understand what the lyrics mean.