Just Mad!

[frgsnlzrds]

Okay, I am really just mad at life in general right now. I have another freakin' lump. And, yeah, I'm pretty freaked out. DH insists I'm overreacting and I haven't called my doctor yet, but I think I know what he's going to say. I had the last one mammo'd twice and the first time they found something on one of the views but they couldn't get a 3D image so they told me it's probably not cancer, relax. WHO WANTS TO HEAR IT'S *PROBABLY* NOT CANCER AND THEN GET TOLD TO GO HOME? My doctor is not the least bit concerned since I'm not even thirty yet. And now I have to go back to where I used to live - 2 hours away - because I live in the boonies now and don't trust the local medical care since they have -get this- a TRAVELING mammogram machine. I am NOT climbing into a van to have my boob squished! I am way too young for this. I breastfed (am still breastfeeding) 3 babies. And if I have to see the ultrasound tech again (the 4th time) she's going to sigh like she always does because even though dh, my nurse, my midwife, my doctor, and myself can feel a lump, she can't feel or see anything.
Argh! I'm just upset. It took a lot for me to swallow my dr.'s offhand remark about how it's probably just an overdeveloped tendon and now it's grown. And from all the poking I did last night, it REALLY hurts today! I guess I'll just cross my fingers and hope.

[elektra]

That does sound maddening!
And just based on the experience MIL has gone through in her current battle with breast cancer, you are completely on the right track with not being satisfied with what the tech or doctor said. MIL's current specialist (that she now sees 2 hours away from her small town) basically said that the past however many years of her mammograms were basically crappy, blurry images and that her cancer probably could have been picked up years prior if someone who actually knew what they were doing had actually looked at them. Nice.
So sorry for going off about MIL's situation but it's so good to hear that you are taking control!
I'll be thinking good thoughts for you.

[tylersmama]

You have every right to be mad and frustrated! :hug: And I agree, do NOT let them tell you no, fight for your right to be thoroughly and completely satisfied that it's not cancer. Just because you aren't in what they consider to be a "high-risk" category doesn't mean it can't happen to you. I lost a friend last year, she was 32 with a young daughter. She was initially blown off by her doctor because she wasn't "high-risk". By the time they confirmed diagnosis, it had progressed too far for treatment to be effective. So yeah, it's probably nothing, but please make sure that that's the case! :hug:

[frgsnlzrds]

That's scary, Tylersmama. I am sorry about your friend. I really hope it's not cancer because I've been living with the first lump for about a year now!

Thank you Elektra, I'll be thinking good thoughts for your MIL, too.

[schums]

I had a lump too a few years ago (everything was fine tho). It hurt really bad too. My doc (who I LOVE) got me in for an almost immediate mammogram (hard to do here). BUT, she also said that a lump that hurt was probably not cancerous. Anyway, go get checked out and don't let them blow you off. But try not to worry as much (if possible) -- cancer doesn't generally cause pain.

[Momof3Labs]

FYI, I've also read and heard that a cancerous lump is highly unlikely to be painful. Not that you don't want to have it checked out, of course. Good luck.

[gatorsmom]

I guess I'll just cross my fingers and hope.

No, insist that they take this seriously. No matter how many sighs or raised eyebrows you get, you MAKE them take you seriously. ESPECIALLY IF IT HAS GROWN. Those people who give you a hard time or roll their eyes at you don't care about you. Why do you care what they think? Just ignore them and insist that you doctor treat this as if you were high risk.

And don't feel bad if you have to be a bitc* about it. It's important that you be your own advocate. I've learned this the hard way since my mother died of breast cancer 4 years ago. Do what is best for you and your family.

big hugs and lots of prayers here. btw, I have also heard that if the lump is painful, it's probably not cancer (that doesn't mean you shouldn't find out for sure). My mothers' lumps were not painful. hth.

[frgsnlzrds]

Thanks, I made an appointment for Friday. It does hurt now, but only since I've been poking at it. I think I made it angry. (slight lol) It didn't hurt before I found it. We'll see what my doctor says. I think I might insist on a different ultra sound tech, though.