Planning a "stress free" trip back home

[MacMacMoo]

Vacation time is at a premium in our family. however we have to go back home before the parents start accusing us of never letting them see the grand kids. So home includes DH parents, DH sister (and her family consisting of husband and a set of twins), my mom (and step dad), my dad (step mom and 2 half brothers), and my sister (though she would be okay as being part of my mom's clump). home is in Atlanta, Ga.

So do we go and spend a day with each? Do we have one big restaurant dinner? Should we try seeing the sites or just spend the days lounging and "catching up?" Do we rent a car or be driven around? Do we place housing hoping each night or just book a hotel and visit with people but have a set place to return to?

We have tried various things, and every time DH's family whine complain moans and groans that we don't give them enough time or that they feel that we are pigeon holing them into a set slot. his family as a whole suffers from high anxiety and have to feel like they are in control and things have to be planned out to a T.

DH and I on the other hand don't really like schedules. we like the flexibility to do things spur of the moment. This is suppose to be a vacation an enjoyble thing to make us want to do it again lol.

[jgenie]

We have the same situation - in that we live away from our families although we only have two groups to visit. We split our time between both families pretty much equally. We tend to spend more weekends with my family because my mom works and MIL does not so she's more flexible. By the time we arrive, I have made specific plans with my family as to what we will be doing each day - generally revolving around eating at my favorite restaurants. We go once a year and my family has gotten really good about trying to clear their calendars so the kids can spend as much time as possible together. For DH's family it's much more last minute - they know which days we'll be with them, but plans are decided on the spot each day. I'm a planner - DH is not so we each handle our respective family as we prefer.

We enjoy our visits - but it is rarely relaxing - seems like we're always trying to fit in too much. Now that we have DS we have scaled way back on what we do during our visits. GL

[Sugar Magnolia]

"Home" is the same place for us and our family situation is exactly the same.

From my experience, I would book a hotel room so you have a central base of sorts. That way you don't have to keep unpacking and packing, the kids will have the same place to sleep, and you have a place to escape if need be. As far as visiting, I would plan blocks of days with each "group": 2 days in a row with your mom, 2 with ILs, 2 with your dad. I like to lounge around and visit. My kids are already out of their element and the last thing they need is to spend hours (it is Atlanta) in a car.

Good luck! Let me know if you have any other questions.