Dear DH - Smarten UP!

[Twoboos]

Surprise! MIL is coming to visit in one short month! Tix are booked. This is the first I've heard of it. :54: MIL tells DD1 first(!!), then gets on the phone w/me. "Is it OK?" <Inside voice: Uhmmmm, do I have a choice here??> Out loud: "Of course!"

Dearest Darling DH, why oh WHY is this the first time I've heard about this? Ohhh b/c MIL wasn't totally sure when she was coming so she asked him NOT TO TELL anyone, including me. And God help me, he didn't. :irked:

Now, I would figure she meant, don't tell DDs so they're not disappointed if she doesn't come. No prob, I get that. But ME?? I live here too, and I thought I would at least be included in the discussion, as I will be entertaining her while DH is at work, and cooking for her, and enduring her inane questions/looks/ judging comments about how I don't iron DH's clothes or match his socks or iron the sheets or pajamas. And things aren't always put away just-so, like at her house and SIL's house.

BONUS: she will be here for Mother's Day. For my first Mother's Day without MY mother. Ohhhh, it's going to be a long painful day. Especially if we spend it with my extended family, who are wonderful and she spares no moment judging them b/c of weight issues. I KNOW she thinks they are white trash. She's never said it to me, but trust me, I can tell.

You really truly could have given me a heads up, DH. Oh, and don't act so puzzled as to why I'm completely ticked off right now. I am not overreacting.

Don't worry, I'm already eating ice cream.

Thank you for listening.

[misshollygolightly]

Boo on her! She definitely should have asked you first, and DH should have told you right away. Can't believe he didn't know better! Grrr. Men are funny about their moms sometimes. Anyway, this Mothers' dDy should be primarily about YOU, not MIL, and you should emphasize to DH that he needs to do it up properly (flowers, breakfast in bed, etc., etc.)!

I suppose it's possible, though, that MIL thought she'd be helping by coming on Mothers' Day (or maybe she just didn't realize). At any rate, I'm very sorry you'll be going through this day without your own mother and with a less-than-tactful MIL. Have you mentioned that aspect of it to DH? It might help to give him a heads up so he can deflect/deal with MIL on that day in particular :hug:

[JBaxter]

My DH would be SO DEAD.

[Twoboos]

My DH would be SO DEAD.

Honestly, he is only alive right now b/c:

1) he gave the girls a bath & is getting them ready for bed
2) I posted this to get it off my chest
3) Someone posted the 25% off Boden code is still working. Loading up my cart.

[JBaxter]

Honestly, he is only alive right now b/c:

1) he gave the girls a bath & is getting them ready for bed
2) I posted this to get it off my chest
3) Someone posted the 25% off Boden code is still working. Loading up my cart.

Honey make it financially PAINFUL for her visit LOL

[Sugar Magnolia]

If it makes you feel any better I just survived a weekend with my MIL while dh was out of town.
And I had a huge 3 day warning that she was coming.
I'm getting a Bugaboo out of it.

Have fun shopping! Buy something cute to wear on Mother's Day!

[hillview]

Honestly unacceptable! WOW I would be SO mad. ARGH. HUGS! You deserve a LOT!
/hillary

[kellyd]

I adore my MIL and there would be heck to pay if DH EVER pulled a stunt like that!!!! This is my first Mother's Day period, and it's already killing me that it's yet another milestone that my mom isn't here for. I've already informed DH that he'd better come up with something good that includes just the 3 of us.

He owes you mama... he owes you BIG TIME for this one!!

[MCsMom]

SHOP 'TIL YOU DROP, Twoboos!

After Boden, go get something nice for yourself.

Like a designer (non-diaper) bad LOL

[gatorsmom]

ugh. I'd be spending a lot of money right now too.

If it makes you feel any better, maybe the time you spend hating your MIL, will help you NOT think about how your mom isn't there. It will make a good distraction, you know? Something about redirecting those powerful, negative feelings toward your MIL.. it might just be a good idea after all.

Or not. Whatever happens, I think you have the perfect excuse to put your MIL in her place and later say that the emotions of the day just came over you and made you say things you wouldn't normally out loud. tee hee hee.

[Twoboos]

SHOP 'TIL YOU DROP, Twoboos!

After Boden, go get something nice for yourself.

Like a designer (non-diaper) bad LOL

Hmm, this would imply all the stuff I got at Boden was NOT for me, when in fact it ALL is! :)

The stuff I wanted for DDs is too far backordered. Getting super-cute summer dresses in 12 weeks would only give them about 4 weeks of wear around here. (I hate how Boden gets so backordered like that!)

[Twoboos]

you have the perfect excuse to put your MIL in her place and later say that the emotions of the day just came over you and made you say things you wouldn't normally out loud. tee hee hee.

See, if I did this MIL would overreact like a child and pout in her room and try to change her tix to go home early. (This has happened before. Luckily, b/c of DH, not me - he wanted to cook his own breakfast one morning. Seriously, she was going to cut her trip short over EGGS.) Although it would be a blessing to get rid of her, the drama that would evolve is not worth it.

I have to remind myself -she lives really far far away and we only see her a couple of times a year. I can be nice for 10 days (yes, it's "only" 10 days!). Well, I can TRY.

We will get at least one date night out of it. The girls will be delighted to see her. She can come to Mother's Day tea at preschool, and she'll be beyond thrilled. Think good thoughts, think good thoughts....

Who was bitching a few days ago about MIL and AF coming?? Pass that twisty when you're done.