ha98ed14
04-14-2009, 02:23 AM
...getting a urine sample from an almost 2 year old!
This is kind of funny now, but I was not laughing 3 hours ago. But here goes. Hopefully this example of Murphy's Law gives you a good laugh.
DD had dark pee in her diaper this morning. I posted about it in the lounge. Called the doc on advice of y'all, and they said bring her in. First available was 5 PM. Great, DH will be home; he can come to help me.
So we go to the doc. They say they need a urine sample. The two options are to "bag her" or use a cath. We decide on the bag because a cath is harder to do on a squirmy toddler. Heck, the bag was hard enough! Picture a ziploc bag with double sided sticky tape around the opening. Then imagine they stick in to your skin "down there" to cover the area where the pee will come out.
So the nurses do this. (You can only imagine the screaming. I felt SO bad for DD. Everything about the scene seemed so wrong.) But they get the bag in place, put the diaper back on, and then we give DD 3 apple juice boxes and wait 2 hours in the doctor's office. No pee. DH and I are both beyond frustrated. We decide she is not going to urinate here because the strange environment is making her nervous. So we ask can we go home with DD still wearing the bag. They say yes and give me a pee cup and a specimen bag to collect the sample. They tell me how to collect it and that I will have to drive the pee to the hospital with a 24 hour lab. Ok. Fine. I agree.
So by now it is 7 PM. We stop on the way home for a quick dinner. And DD has a BM. But isn't not a nice firm one; no, it is diarrhea. From all the apple juice. It is everywhere, running out the side of her leg, leaking from the diaper AND all over the bag that is still taped in place to collect the pee.
BUT! There is still hope. The liquid poo did not get INTO the bag, or so we think. So we clean up DD as much as possible, but have to leave the bag in place still covered in poo. (I was not about to try and clean it off in the restaurant bathroom.) We come home, wrestle DD onto the changing table, but before we can stop her, DD reaches down and pulls off the bag. DH hands it to me, still poo covered, for me to try and recover the pee sample without contaminating it. If the sample is contaminated, we must go through this whole thing again.
I do my best to wash off the bag, cut the corner off and transfer the pee into the cup. I then drive 20 mins to the hospital to drop it off. I tell the lab tech this whole story and how I am worried it might be contaminated, etc. She looks at it and says it looks ok to the naked eye, but they will call me if they need another.
OMG. How I hope they do not need another.
So my version of he!! is having to collect pee samples from un-PT'd almost 2 year old children. God bless peds nurses!
This is kind of funny now, but I was not laughing 3 hours ago. But here goes. Hopefully this example of Murphy's Law gives you a good laugh.
DD had dark pee in her diaper this morning. I posted about it in the lounge. Called the doc on advice of y'all, and they said bring her in. First available was 5 PM. Great, DH will be home; he can come to help me.
So we go to the doc. They say they need a urine sample. The two options are to "bag her" or use a cath. We decide on the bag because a cath is harder to do on a squirmy toddler. Heck, the bag was hard enough! Picture a ziploc bag with double sided sticky tape around the opening. Then imagine they stick in to your skin "down there" to cover the area where the pee will come out.
So the nurses do this. (You can only imagine the screaming. I felt SO bad for DD. Everything about the scene seemed so wrong.) But they get the bag in place, put the diaper back on, and then we give DD 3 apple juice boxes and wait 2 hours in the doctor's office. No pee. DH and I are both beyond frustrated. We decide she is not going to urinate here because the strange environment is making her nervous. So we ask can we go home with DD still wearing the bag. They say yes and give me a pee cup and a specimen bag to collect the sample. They tell me how to collect it and that I will have to drive the pee to the hospital with a 24 hour lab. Ok. Fine. I agree.
So by now it is 7 PM. We stop on the way home for a quick dinner. And DD has a BM. But isn't not a nice firm one; no, it is diarrhea. From all the apple juice. It is everywhere, running out the side of her leg, leaking from the diaper AND all over the bag that is still taped in place to collect the pee.
BUT! There is still hope. The liquid poo did not get INTO the bag, or so we think. So we clean up DD as much as possible, but have to leave the bag in place still covered in poo. (I was not about to try and clean it off in the restaurant bathroom.) We come home, wrestle DD onto the changing table, but before we can stop her, DD reaches down and pulls off the bag. DH hands it to me, still poo covered, for me to try and recover the pee sample without contaminating it. If the sample is contaminated, we must go through this whole thing again.
I do my best to wash off the bag, cut the corner off and transfer the pee into the cup. I then drive 20 mins to the hospital to drop it off. I tell the lab tech this whole story and how I am worried it might be contaminated, etc. She looks at it and says it looks ok to the naked eye, but they will call me if they need another.
OMG. How I hope they do not need another.
So my version of he!! is having to collect pee samples from un-PT'd almost 2 year old children. God bless peds nurses!