'what a bummer'

[MamaMolly]

What the heck am I supposed to do with that?

I teach a music class for parents/caregivers and children. At the request of several parents in the class, we decided to cancel our class on Memorial Day weekend (Sunday). We tacked a class onto the end of the semester BTW, so we aren't loosing out on the number of classes. Anyway, I just got an email from a parent that said:

'what a bummer' (and nothing else)

:shrug: I have no idea how to respond to that. To be quite honest, right now I'm under a tremendous amount of stress and really took it badly. I'm feeling pecked to death by ducks, like everyone *and I mean everyone* I know is either unbelievably needy or is taking pot shots at me. Maybe my perspective is not very good right now, but to me it sounded really pouty and whiny.

So talk me off the ledge here. (I'm not going to reply with 'suck it up' or 'grow up', both of which crossed my mind ;) ). But do you think I should even respond and if so, what do you suggest?

[SnuggleBuggles]

"Sorry you are having a hard time with our schedule change. I hope you'll be able to join us at this make up class because we sure would like to have little Suzy there!"

That's what comes to my mind. How frustrating. You can't please everyone all the time so just let these ones roll off your back. It sounds like you made a smart scheduling choice, imo.

Beth

[ha98ed14]

I agree with Beth's wording. I would also add something like "The decidion to move the last class was at the request of several parents in the group." (Also if there was a discussion or a vote on it, include the day that it was discussed.)

ETA: I'm sorry your feeling like the world is sh!tting on you. I've BTDT. It sucks. Sometimes I just have to stay home and not answer my phone or check email for a day or 2 to shake the feeling. But I'm probably a little nuts...

[Momof3Labs]

Perhaps the tacked on class overlaps a vacation and they won't be able to make it? When DS's swimming class had to cancel a class (due to a last-minute conflict at the high school), they offered the option of tacking on a class at the end or retaining your swim pass to exchange for a $5 credit (the cost of one class) towards a future set of classes. I thought that was very fair as the rescheduled class didn't work for everyone as it wasn't part of the original schedule.

[MontrealMum]

I guess the problem with "what a bummer" is that it could have been meant in so many different ways. Yes, it could mean "well that really sucks for me" which is how you, and most of us, would interpret it. But it could also mean the really inocuous "too bad" - w/o blame - KWIM? When did we stop teaching writing in schools? So many people are just so bad at expressing themselves these days. So many of the same people are also terrible at reading to the end of any sort of instructions...as per what you must have written regarding the extra tacked on class.

I would be pissed too for all those reasons, but I think Beth really worded it well. It acknowledges the "problem" or "issue" or whatever you want to call it, but it's very pointed (re make-up class) and still very polite. It may or may not draw this person out into further verbosity - though I don't know if you want that or not ;) And it may just placate them. Hard to know with that sort of one-liner if they need/expect that or not, so I think this really covers all the bases.

[lorinick]

I agree with Beth in the response. But in IMO it's not a big deal she said bummer it could mean many things or really mean nothing more than my child won't be here the day your making up the class or I really want to have the class anyway. I'm not even sure you need to repond to the email at all.

[gatorsmom]

I agree with Molly. His response could have meant many things. I was thinking maybe this parent did n't know how to respond and so typed that as kind of a way of saying, "oh, that's too bad." sort of off the cuff, you know?

My first thought as to how to repond would be simply to email back, "have a great weekend and see you after the holidays!" in a cheerful tone. But that might sound insensitive in case this person really is disappointed. In that case, I like Beth's reply.

If I were you, I would try not to take it personally. You just can't please all the people all the time, no matter how hard you try to accomodate. It's not you, it's them. :hug:

[C99]

That is when you hit the delete button on the e-mail and feign ignorance if the person is dumb enough to bring it up in person at a later date.

[citymama]

I think it could just mean "too bad" - nothing more. It caught you at a bad time and should/could have been worded more sensitively. I wonder whether it was sent from a Blackberry or iPhone - I find that one line emails I get from hand-held devices frequently come across as rude because a) they are abrupt and b) because the person writing has at most skimmed your email, and sent a not very well-thought out response. I'd give them the benefit of the doubt and try and put it out of your mind!

[pinkmomagain]

I agree with the "too bad", off the cuff response. I'd let it go.

[MamaMolly]

Thanks guys! In the thinking part of my brain I knew I felt like a walking bull's eye and likely had taken it WAY too personally. And now that I've gone back and figured out who sent it, I feel like a total A$$HOLE for whining here. It is a super sweet family. Mom is usually a bit early and we hang out and chat before class starts. So you guys were totally right, it was a no-biggie kind of thing.

I'm so glad to have you all to bounce things off of!!

[DrSally]

Reading it as someone not involved, I'd just take it as a very mild expression of disappointment, and not take it too personally.