Anyone commute 30+ mins of highway to get DC to daycare?

[daisyd]

We are trying to finalize daycare for 8.5month old DS before I return to work in a couple of weeks. We are torn between 2 places A and B. Some background about us - DH and I work about 35 mins from home in opposite directions. I have long and erratic hours while DH has a flexible schedule and can work from home once a week if he wants. So it looks like DH will always drop off and pick up most days except in emergencies .

Daycare A is 7 mins from home and provides good care. Its location is great for DH's working from home/ sick days and I can do the pick up if my schedule lightens up Its drawback is that its expensive. We can afford it if we choose, but I'd rather spend the money on DCs education down the road.

Daycare B is 7 mins from DH's workplace and by far is the best we've seen. Its several hundred dollars less expensive and provides better care than A. But B would make it difficult for DH to work from home or if he was sick. But what seems a major drawback is that DH's commute is 35-45mins of highway. While DC travels well DH's big concern is the risk of motor vehicle accidents/safety on the highways esp given our wicked New England winters.

I know from other threads that other parents do the long commute to daycare. Could anyone who commutes 30+ mins of highway to get DC to daycare advice us or share your experience with us?

Thanks a bunch!

Daisy

[cvanbrunt]

I'm not who you want to hear from, but I'll chime in. I have a 50-60 minute commute and DH is 5-10 minutes. My university daycare is great and very cheap. DH daycare is great and very expensive. We went with DH daycare for the reasons you list as pros for the close center.

[egoldber]

I'm torn myself. We have the option of keeping Amy where she has been, about 10 minutes from home. DH works mainly from home with some travel and business meetings 30 minutes away. My commute will be 45-60 minutes. There is a daycare right at my workplace that is $200 less expensive than the one we have now.

We are going to try the closer one for awhile to see how it goes.

[daisyd]

Carrie, thanks for your reply. It helps to have another perspective. We might end up doing just that. Only we don't want to rush into a decision because of our recent bad experience at daycare that I'd posted about.

[daisyd]

Beth, thanks for writing. I followed your previous thread about this issue hoping to get some clarity for my situation. In my case the price difference is $700 :(. I'd rather put that away in a college fund.

Hope your childcare arrangement works out.

[billysmommy]

When ds1 was little we chose a daycare near my work which was ~45 minutes from our home. We looked at daycares near work and near our home. We chose that daycare because it was one of the best we looked at and I felt that in an emergency I wanted to be able to be with him quickly instead of having to drive home first. He had no problems with the traveling at all. He was at that daycare from Sept '03 until Aug '04 when I switched jobs to work with DH.

We're in NE also and we just planned extra travel time in the winter. Our commute was about 1/2 highway and 1/2 side roads (1A ~ Norfolk, Walpole, Norwood)

[bubbaray]

I'd go with the closer daycare.

[daisyd]

When ds1 was little we chose a daycare near my work which was ~45 minutes from our home. We looked at daycares near work and near our home. We chose that daycare because it was one of the best we looked at and I felt that in an emergency I wanted to be able to be with him quickly instead of having to drive home first. He had no problems with the traveling at all. He was at that daycare from Sept '03 until Aug '04 when I switched jobs to work with DH.

We're in NE also and we just planned extra travel time in the winter. Our commute was about 1/2 highway and 1/2 side roads (1A ~ Norfolk, Walpole, Norwood)

Lori, thanks for sharing your experience. It helps to think of this in a time bound fashion - we'll definitely send DC to preschool close to home.

[daisyd]

I'd go with the closer daycare.

Looks like we might end up doing this. The other option is for us to move close to DH's workplace, so that DC can go to daycare B. That 1hr commute sucks for me, which is why we moved to a midpoint between our workplaces in the first place.

[JElaineB]

We commuted 30 mintues, mostly interstate highway, for 2.5 years (including 3 Midwest winters). However it was all 3 of us (me, DH and DS), so it was preferable to have DS near our work places rather than nearer to home. The winters sucked. If the weather was really bad I would stay home with DS, though usually his daycare was closed on those days anyway. That was typically several times per year. Other than that since all three of us were travelling in the same direction there weren't any of the other potential issues you might end up having. When DH and I were travelling in opposite directions we had daycare closer to home or sort of in-between. In your case, I would agree to choose the one closest to home so that both of you can do pick-ups/drop-offs if needed.

[cvanbrunt]

Another thought. I have a longer commute but I actually don't mind it and usually enjoy it. It's all highway and in the opposite direction of traffic so it is a relaxing drive. Frankly, it is the only quiet, alone time I get. You might enjoy having that and let DH take care of this chore.

[daisyd]

We commuted 30 mintues, mostly interstate highway, for 2.5 years (including 3 Midwest winters). However it was all 3 of us (me, DH and DS), so it was preferable to have DS near our work places rather than nearer to home. The winters sucked. If the weather was really bad I would stay home with DS, though usually his daycare was closed on those days anyway. That was typically several times per year. Other than that since all three of us were travelling in the same direction there weren't any of the other potential issues you might end up having. When DH and I were travelling in opposite directions we had daycare closer to home or sort of in-between. In your case, I would agree to choose the one closest to home so that both of you can do pick-ups/drop-offs if needed.

Thanks for that perspective Elaine. We are leaning towards the daycare close to home. We just have to bite the bullet about the expense.

[daisyd]

Another thought. I have a longer commute but I actually don't mind it and usually enjoy it. It's all highway and in the opposite direction of traffic so it is a relaxing drive. Frankly, it is the only quiet, alone time I get. You might enjoy having that and let DH take care of this chore.
Carrie, this is exactly the situation DH has. I work in the city, while he works in the suburbs. So he does not have to deal with the kind of rush hour traffic that traveling to and from the city involves. Even sacrificing the flexibility of working from home is ok with DH but the safety issue is big for him. I lost a cousin when she was 1 year old in a road accident and I know how frail young babies are. So I guess we'll just end up with daycare close to home.

[daisyd]

Thanks everyone for sharing your opinions. It has helped to discuss this and come to a decision.