More preschool questions and an update

[JTsMom]

Here's my original thread:
http://www.windsorpeak.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=324683&highlight=preschool

And here are my questions:
1. How many days/hours a week does your DC attend preschool, or do they not go at all?
2. How did you come to that decision, and how well is it working?
3. What is a typical day like at school? How much is expected of your DC?


And here's the mini-update:
We did go and tour the crunchy progressive school. It is pretty great. I'd go so far as to say it's pretty much ideal- you know, except for that pesky HOUR AND 10 MINUTE drive it involves.

At our initial tour, I wasn't sure if it was a good match or not. Jason and I went back today though, and he got to participate in the 3 year old camp class that was there, while I snuck around trying to see how things went, and now I think it would be just about perfect.

A typical day during the school year is 9-12, with the option to stay another hour for lunch for an additional fee. The number of days a week would depend on what age class we decided to place Jason in- we're pondering this now based on how he did today- I'm leaning towards the 4 yr old class.

The days and weeks have a rhythm, but not a strict routine. Basically, they start with circle time- stories, songs, etc. They start by only expecting the kids to sit for about 2 mins, and build from there. Then they go outside to play for an hour or so. They play outside every single day, even if it rains (you have to send rain gear). Then they have free time, but also have activities set up for whoever wants to do them- today they were making some type of bread dough, for example. They encourage the kids to participate, but if they aren't into it, they just play whatever they'd like to. Then they do some type of project- painting, making soup, etc.

Everything is seasonally based- there is not religious instruction.

The discipline policy is along the lines of redirecting, then if that doesn't work, taking a little walk with the child and trying again, and if that still doesn't work, the child kind of just sticks next to the teacher, not in a punishing way. They do not do time outs.

They are very flexible about how many days you bring the kids, but if your child is in the 4 yr old class, you pay for 5 days regardless of how many they attend. Several kids only go 3 days a week- which is probably what I'd do.

So, as idyllic as this all is, the thought of doing this drive 3+ days a week is killing me. We're still looking at other options closer to home, but it's not looking good. Things are much more strictly structured from what I'm being told. It would be more affordable though. I'm having a hard time figuring out where the balance should be for Jason as far as structure and academics go. Maybe he can handle more than I'm giving him credit for- IDK. 5 full days a week just sounds like so much for a 4 year old, but maybe I'm off base.

[bubbaray]

*I* wouldn't do that commute for PS. My girls haven't gone to PS, but they do go to DC FT. You could not pay me enough to commute with them 3 or 5 days/week for over an hour each way. YMMV.

FWIW, the new daycare they are moving to is about 5 minutes from our home. THAT is ideal to me. :)

[jren]

I had a 20 min. commute (each way) to DD's preschool and it got OLD fast. Can't imagine an even longer commute. DD just finished preschool and is going to Kindy in the fall. They require a TON from them in kindy. Full day (6.5 hours), 5 days a week. And busy. They gave us a list of things we should work on BEFORE they start. The list is stuff that we didn't even work on yet when I was in Kindy. Things have changed. If not for preschool, she'd be going in SO far behind, and I think she'd easily get overwhelmed. I'm still worried about that....

Anyway, we only did 3 days, 9 to 1 including lunch but Fri was 9 to 12 no lunch. They came in, sat down and worked on a project immediately. Lots of themes and activities throughout the day. Music class every day, etc. I guess pretty structured, not a lot of free play time except for outside play every day and quiet time at the end for books.

If you're doing 2 or 3 days, I wouldn't worry about the structure - he will surprise you. They are structured, but make it fun so it doesn't "seem" structured. Plus a little structure will mean less of a shock next year.

[egoldber]

I would not even consider that commute for preschool. 10-15 minutes is my limit.

[AnnieW625]

Things are much more strictly structured from what I'm being told. It would be more affordable though. I'm having a hard time figuring out where the balance should be for Jason as far as structure and academics go. Maybe he can handle more than I'm giving him credit for- IDK. 5 full days a week just sounds like so much for a 4 year old, but maybe I'm off base.

I went back and forth when I was pregnant with DD about keeping her at a daycare close to home or having her near me at work so I could visit at lunch and stuff. I ended up chosing the place closer to home because I would hate as she got older to have to bring her to see her friends 30 minutes from our home.

Now as far as the closer to home choice is go and visit and form your own opinions. I used to work at Montessori schools in college and the kids were there five days a week either from 9 to 2 or 9 to 12 and 99.9% of them did well in the 5 day a week classes. Be open and honest with the director and other staff at the school about your concerns and maybe that will help ease your mind about things. I am sure Jason will do fine.

[Wife_and_mommy]

I would not even consider that commute for preschool. 10-15 minutes is my limit.

:yeahthat: Ours was 12 minutes and even it was a bit much at times.

[maydaymommy]

I was an early childhood teacher for 7 years pre-ds.

I am totally committed to the ideal of having the best school experience for your child. I'm immensely in favor of finding the right fit for your kid/your family.

That being said, there is NO WAY I would subject my child (or myself) to a drive of longer than 20 minutes in order to get to school. Seriously, it won't be good for anyone involved.

I wish I had more encouraging advice. I know how hard it must be to see a great place that's just out of reach. Please spend your time finding out more about the programs nearby, rather than falling more in love with the far away one!

[JTsMom]

So it's pretty much unanimous that I'm insane? :ROTFLMAO:

[egoldber]

I might do a drive like that for a MUCH older child for a very special once in a lifetime camp. NOT for preschool.

Sarah has a hard time with the school schedule (she's easily overstimulated and needs lots of downtime after activities) and her preschool schedule was 2 days a week at 2, 3 days a week at 3 and 5 days a week at 4. She did fine with the 5 days a week at 4 and even stayed after school a couple times a week for special classes. This was a playbased preschool that went from 9-1.

FWIW Amy did 5 days a week this year (same school, same 9-1) and was fine. She needs a LOT more stimulation than Sarah did at the same age though.

[niccig]

So it's pretty much unanimous that I'm insane? :ROTFLMAO:

Sorry, but yes you are if you're going to drive that far. I live in LA, so pretty bad traffic. We have a 10-15 min rule on driving DS to school. Our preschool is 10 mins (against traffic) and the elementary school we're looking at is also 10 mins and against the traffic. Even with a 10 min drive, I would drop DS off at 8.45, go grocery shopping, take groceries home, have a little time to do something at home and then go pick him up at 11.45....you won't be able to go home, you'll have to do things in and around his school...I like being able to do some projects when DS is at school - things I don't want to do with his "help"...

[JTsMom]

Beth, how do you think Sarah would have done if you had started her at 4, 5 days a week right off the bat? I think a full day at most of these places is 8-2 FWIW.

Today, Jason fell asleep in the car almost instantly, and he was only at school from 9:30-12.

[egoldber]

how do you think Sarah would have done if you had started her at 4, 5 days a week right off the bat

Well, it probably would have been hard, but I think she would have adjusted. I would try to find a shorter day though. Interesting that the days are so long there. Around here, I had a hard time finding 9-1! Most preschools here are 9-12.

ETA: And she always had 3 months of summer off in between sessions, so it was almost like starting over again every year. And you can slowly work up to it.

[bubbaray]

So it's pretty much unanimous that I'm insane? :ROTFLMAO:


Welllllll, you said it, not me. LOL. But, yeah, the only way I would sign up for a commute like that with *my* girls would be if I booked myself for a lobotomy first. Just sayin'....

[JTsMom]

Welllllll, you said it, not me. LOL. But, yeah, the only way I would sign up for a commute like that with *my* girls would be if I booked myself for a lobotomy first. Just sayin'....
:hysterical: You owe me a new keyboard.

[JTsMom]

Well, it probably would have been hard, but I think she would have adjusted. I would try to find a shorter day though. Interesting that the days are so long there. Around here, I had a hard time finding 9-1! Most preschools here are 9-12.

ETA: And she always had 3 months of summer off in between sessions, so it was almost like starting over again every year. And you can slowly work up to it.

Yeah- it's weird. I think it's b/c of the GA pre-k program. It has to be full time to get the state to pay for it, and most parents won't shell out the $ voluntarily. Also, with that program, the attendance policy is the same as it is for regular elementary, so no pulling kids out for trips or anything.

DH talked to one place today that offered 3 full days- that might be more doable.

[tny915]

I just have to chime in, as someone who has commuted for preschool with DD for 3 years. DD's preschool is a 20-30 minute drive from home. Fabulous, unstructured program, focused on social development. It was 2 3-hour days for year 1, 3 3-hour days for year 2, and 5 3 or 4-hour days for pre-K year 3. 30 minutes is our limit. I cannot even imagine 1 hour +. I absolutely love DD's preschool and DD2 will go there when it's time, but if we moved farther, we'd probably not survive the drive. If it were me, knowing how much I LOVE our preschool's program, I would do the commute. BUT I would get on the list of a closer program as a backup option in the event that we couldn't take the drive anymore.

[bubbaray]

:hysterical: You owe me a new keyboard.


he he he.... ;)

[lmwbasye]

Think about it this way...you will be making up for any free play time he may be losing at a closer school by giving him the two extra hours a day at home with you. As a previous kindy teacher, I always go back to the fact that parents really are the best teachers in a lot of ways. Do you want him to spend 10 hrs a week strapped into a seat or readking with you, playing with blocks, coloring, etc?

Good luck with your decision!

[JTsMom]

Oooh! I just found a promising looking Montessori program that has 1/2 days, and it's maybe 20 mins away tops! :boogie:

I think you guys have pretty much talked me out of the insane commute. I think I would end up really hating the drive. When I was thinking we could do 2 days a week, it was doable, but 3 puts me over the edge.

[Momof3Labs]

Yeah, you are nuts to consider it. DS1's preschool was a 20 minute drive, and we decided that was too far for DS2 (also a teacher change - leaving us with no connection to the school). DS2's preschool is a 5-7 minute drive, and I think that is more like it. Yes, it is their first school experience and important in its own way, but it is still *only* preschool.

[JTsMom]

Think about it this way...you will be making up for any free play time he may be losing at a closer school by giving him the two extra hours a day at home with you. As a previous kindy teacher, I always go back to the fact that parents really are the best teachers in a lot of ways. Do you want him to spend 10 hrs a week strapped into a seat or readking with you, playing with blocks, coloring, etc?

Good luck with your decision!

That's a really good point Laura. Thanks for your input. :)

[JTsMom]

Since we have some early ed people posting, here's my big concern- Jason is way more challenging than your average kid. I have a feeling we're heading towards a very early ADHD dx at a minimum. He has a minor speech delay and sensory issues.

I don't know if I'm worrying too much about it, or not enough about it- kwim? I think I'm used to being around particularly easy going kids, so maybe I just think it's going to be more of a problem than it is.

ETA: He is a really sweet kid, and he can be extremely kind and charming- but he can also be extremely persistent when it comes to doing something wants to/doesn't want to do. I'm just terrified that he's going to be labeled "that kid", and that it's going to cause more social problems than it's worth, kwim?