Dear fancy restaurant... (dairy elim)

[justincase]

When I tell the server that I can't eat any dairy AT ALL, and explain when she looks blank that means not just cheese but butter, cream, etc. and she goes to check with the chef on what I can order... And then comes back and tells me there's basically *nothing* I can order as is, but that "the chef would be more than happy to make something specially for you, we work with dietary restrictions all the time, he can modify any of these four items very easily and they would still taste great" and I order one of those items... Then am I right to be p!ssed off when there was clearly dairy in my meal?? I have eaten absolutely nothing else "new"...

I don't want to end up in the BP so I'll ask an actual question. Those of you who've BTDT: how long can I expect DD to be suffering for my lunch out? She is still breaking out and having the green mucousy poops. It's been about 48 hours. Please please please tell me we are not back to square one (day 1). How much can I have ingested in one meal?! When I accidentally ate it once before (in the roll of an Arby's roast beef before I learned my lesson about rolls) it took less than half a day.

[DebbieJ]

so sorry that happened. Did you call the fancy restaurant BEFORE you went to make sure that they could accomodate you?

[justincase]

Yup. And I know the owner personally, so when she said "OF COURSE!" I felt confident.

[alirebco]

Ugh, that stinks!! How much dairy was in the meal? Did you know it when you're eating it so you only had a few bites? If I deal with a clueless server, I will ask the manager to come out and tell them I have a dairy allergy, so don't cook my veggies in anything but oil (no oil blends either), and no cheese as garnish.

Depending on how much she ingested, it could be a few more days. I hope it gets out of her system soon!

[justincase]

No, I didn't know. I was confident (more confident than I would have been in other circumstances) that it was okay, so I ate it all up -- pasta with pancetta and veggies. I guess there could have been quite a bit of butter instead of oil but it didn't taste particularly "buttery". Nothing else, though, no cheese, no cream sauce, etc. I'm kind of surprised it is taking so long, which is why I posted. Thanks for the sympathy!

[MamaMolly]

I think the duration is a matter of quantity you ingested. It sucks, I've BTDT as has poor DD. I wish I had better advice, but I don't.

I have a few suggestions. Some of the Mamas over at www.kidswithfoodallergies.com have these cards to give to the chef, it makes quite an impression. Plus, I'd give one to the manager on duty as well.http://www.foodallergy.org/downloads/ChefCard_Interactive.pdf. The more people you make aware of the issue the better chance you have of success.

Another thing I'd do is tell the owner. They really NEED the feedback, and that is how I'd address it. I'd tell them that you were disappointed with your visit, explain why (the dairy in the meal), and what you think might help (the servers should be trained to get the manager when a customer mentions food allergies), and in the case of a food allergy the chef ought to come out to speak to you personally to confirm needs. I know in some restaurants the manager will 'stay' with your food from prep to the table just to make sure there are no accidental X-contaminations.

I agree with the PP that I'd call ahead to the restaurant just to alert them and give them a head's up.

You CAN go out to eat in a restaurant, it just takes a lot prep, vigilance and a bit of faith.
Good Luck.