3 yr old won't stay in bed

[neeleymartin]

my sil's 3 yr old won't stay in bed at night. they moved him into a double/queen bed about 6-8mos ago. he was moving into a new bedroom so they thought that it was a perfect time to introduce the new "big boy bed". since then, with my sil or bro will go into bed with him until he falls asleep. it's been working well, but some idependence is in order.

this past week, sil tried to just put him in and walk away (after typical bedtime routine) screaming fits, "mommy help", "daddy help". finally after about 40minutes of screaming, sil went in and decided to lay down with him. out like a light in 5 minutes or less (likely worn out from all the crying). would he have fallen asleep soon if she hadn't gone in? as you all know i am a HUGE fan of cio. but is 3 too old to do so?

any advice on how to get this kiddo to stay in bed and go to sleep without the fits? She put a hook lock on the outside of the door (b/c he can open doors by himself) it was the only way to keep him in. tia for the great advice.

[Melaine]

We installed a cheap ($30) security camera in the girls' room for bedtime. If they get up, we quickly put them right back in bed. They stopped getting up pretty quickly, and they seem to think we are always watching (which is cool!).
I think that your friends need to go in there and tell him firmly, "It's bedtime, good night, I love you, no yelling" and if he keeps yelling go back in there in like 5 minutes again and say the same thing. I would say they should never get in the bed with him, because he will just yell until they do it again. I think if they stay strong and just keep telling him it's bedtime that in a few nights it will be much better. I guess it is kind of like CIO.

[neeleymartin]

thanks melaine. that sounds like supernanny advice to me. i will forward along.

anyone have any other advice?

[Clarity]

we moved dd1 into a queen bed at about 2 1/2. When we moved her, I talked to her about sleep rules. Her first sleep rule was that she was to remain in bed until mommy or daddy came to get her. She is not to get out of bed until mommy or daddy says it is okay. Believe it or not, 6 months later, she still stays in bed until we say it is okay to get out. She'll call for us if she needs something or when she wakes in the morning.