Freaked out about expecting a boy...please tell me what's so great about boys

[goldenpig]

OK, so we just found out our DC2 will be a boy. I was totally expecting to have another girl...in fact the first thing I did when I found out I was pregnant was to buy a "Big sister" shirt for DD and a "Little sister" onesie! Although I had an inkling it might not be a girl when we would ask DD "Is mommy having a boy or girl?" and she ALWAYS said "Boy". I guess she somehow knew! I'll be glad no matter what gender, as long as it's healthy. That's really the main thing. But that said, I'm kind of worried about having a boy...all these issues I didn't want to deal with. Having to buy all new clothes, strollers, redecorating the nursery etc. (yes I went crazy for pink). All her cousins are girls and we've been passing clothes and baby stuff back and forth...but a lot of pink stuff...and how will a boy fit in with all the girls. DD and DS won't be able to share rooms. My brother has Asperger's (and I have a few "odd" male cousins) so I'm worried about a higher risk of autism in boys. Circ or no circ. DD is a picky eater and small for her age...fine since she's a girl but it would be harder if she were a short/scrawny boy. Had lots of girl names picked out but boy names are so boring. I wanted DD to have a sister she could be close with...I am very close with my two sisters (who each have one or two girls too), but not so much with my two brothers, who never call me (once when my brother called me I asked "What's wrong?" because I thought it must be some emergency). Also I am not sure if I would be as close to a boy as I am with my DD--how could he possibly be as great as my wonderful DD :). And every time I see rowdy rough-and-tumble boys hitting each other, screaming and wrestling at the playground, I would think to myself "Thank god I have a girl!" Well now I'm in for it! I'm not crying or anything, still happy to have a baby on the way, but feel like I'm saying goodbye to my little Charlotte forever. DH also very much wanted another girl, but I don't think he's quite as disappointed because part of him also wanted a boy. Please help me...tell me it's OK and why boys are so great! And if you've been in a similar situation, how/when did you get over your disappointment and how is it now that you actually have a boy? Thanks!

[brittone2]

FWIW, my first 2nd child is a girl, and my first is a boy. My DD has been more "rough and tumble" through toddlerhood than my DS ever was. (DS is now 5.5 and pretty calm for a 5 year old boy ;) DD is 2.75 years old and definitely more wild than DS at that age!)

Lots of good info in the archives etc. about circ or intact. I know I personally *agonized* over the decision...and looking back it makes me LOL as we left DS intact and it was sooooooo not a big deal at all. I can't believe I stressed so much about leaving DS intact. It has been no more difficult to take care of his intact penis than his toes ;)

Boys adore their mamas ;)

Congrats!!

[ha98ed14]

I only have one DC, a girl, BUT, I know a lot of wonderful boys. The think I notice about when they are young is that there is SO much less drama at 2 and 3 years old. I am sure it will last into the teenage years. Now it seems like, "OMG! What will I do with a boy!" But after he gets here and you live with him, you won't be able to remember your life any differently. It happens that way about a lot of things is life, I think.

One thing to bear in mind is that little babies don't care what they are wearing. So if his at-home outifts are pink or frilly, he will be none the wiser. And they wear the small size for such a short time, it is not worth buying an entire wardrobe on pink. Second: Craigslist. Sell all your pink gear at good prices (at least half what you paid for them new or less depending on condition) and it WILL sell and you can use the money to buy more neutral gear...off Craigslist!

[BabyMine]

My friend also had a girl first and just had a boy a couple weeks ago. She says her DD thinks DS is a doll and loves to take care of him. Don't worry about how they will get along. Their different genders isn't a prediction of how they will act towards each other. Now it is 2 against 2. You and DD can gang up on DH and DS. You only have to share your things with one DC instead of 2. DH will have to share his tools.

[icunurse]

LOL I am the complete opposite. I was beyond thrilled when DS came along and, while the important thing was a healthy child, I remember thinking "WTF do I do now?" when DD came along. Never saw myself as a girl mom. Still have trouble seeing myself as the mother of a girl. Still hoping we will eventually add another child to our family and, yes, I would prefer a boy :)

Boys love their Mommies. They wear cute little dinosaur clothes and make fun sounds with their toy cars. Yes, they can be rough-and-tumble, but, in our case, DD is much more of a handful....much more. My little boy is snuggly and, even on my worst day, tells me that I am pretty (though he said that lipstick would make me even prettier!).

I didn't think adding a girl was a big deal, other than I needed some new clothes for her. And I didn't stress out about the circ decision - I knew what I wanted and why and went with it, no pressure and no regrets, which is what you will do, too, I am sure :)

Congrats!

[mom2binsd]

My first was a girl, then along came DS 3 years later...we did not know if we were having a boy or girl although I thought for sure he was going to be a girl (and I'd get to use the 15 tubs of clothing that was going to be the right season and everything!)....well my little boy is as much of a cuddle love as DD is...he loves to rough house and snuggle...in fact maybe more so than DD did. I think there is a special bond that mothers have with their daughters and their sons, a different type of relationship and one that I expect will grow and change as they both mature.

There's also something so wonderful when any child just has to have their "MOMMY!", I honestly don't mind the occasional night when I need to snuggle him (or her) after a nightmare/leg cramp etc -they never seem to call out for daddy!

[JBaxter]

I only have boys. At this point I couldnt imagine it any other way. Yes they tend to be a little more daring but they are all different my oldest was the most mellow gentle child. But boys LOVE their mommas :) Some of my boys are circ'd some arnt. I did change my opinion after I reseached it and decided that they were born perfect so I left them that way. There is aspergers in DH's family so we delay vaccines and avoid highly processed foods ( eat lots of organic) Like any neuro issue early detection and therapy helps TONS. There is a genetic link so just be aware.

My oldest son is 17 and his girlfriend ( super sweetie) will tell you that Logan is a mommas boy what momma wants momma gets

[Pennylane]

I'm not even sure where to start. Boys are great! I can't imagine feeling a sense of disappointment that I was expecting a boy.

I'll start with clothes, buy them in the boys section. It is very well defined and you won't have any trouble locating it. Most of the clothes are not pink.

There are tons of great boy names. I actually had the opposite problem when I had my dc. I had tons picked out for a boy and thought that girl names were harder, they sometimes seem to automatically label a girl.

I have 3 dc, two girls and a boy. My dd's adore their brother, I mean ADORE him! He is so easy going, lovable and sweet. They love to play cars with him and he is just as happy cooking in the kitchen with them.

Not all boys are "rowdy rough-and-tumble boys hitting each other, screaming and wrestling at the playground" type boys. My ds loves to read, play games and draw. He is the sweetest, kindest child and so far does not have a mean bone in his body.


Ann

[SnuggleBuggles]

I absolutely love my boys!!

They make you see life totally differently, ime. I love their energy, excitement, spirit...I am so happy to be a mom to boys.

Beth

[niccig]

I only have one DC, DS. When we found out he was a boy, I freaked out a little. I have 2 sisters and I knew nothing about little boys. I told DH that he would have to do the potty training, as how did I know how boys peed. Fast Forward 2.5 years, and I'm the one teaching DS how to pee against a tree. And I know more about trucks and cars than I thought possible.

What I'm saying is "You will Figure it Out".

I can't imagine not having DS, and I would not trade him for the world. We're not having anymore children, I do not have any girl envy at all. Yes, SOME boys are more rough and tumble. BUT not all. I really don't like the stereotype that all boys are loud and all girls are quiet. It's just not true. Both my friends have a DD#2 that are louder then my DS.

I also agree with boys loving their mommies. DS is very snuggly.

Congratulations on your boy.

[jellibeans]

I love my little boy. When he looks at me with those adoring eyes, I could give him just about anything. I always thought that I would want all girls, but I really don't know what I would do without him. Right now, I am his most favorite person in the world and I know that is because he is a mama's boy and I LOVE IT!!! Enjoy your boy! Wrestle with him, run around with him, play trains and cars with him...I enjoy all of that soooo much more than role playing with my dd. Congrats!

[niccig]

Low Maintenance, well at least for now. We were at the beach with friends that have a 6 yo and a 3 yo DDs. We were going to a restaurant for lunch. I put DS under the outdoor shower, rinsed him off and changed him. Their girls took so much longer, as every tiny speck of sand had to be off them, hair washed, combed, then they didn't want to wear the clothes their mother had brought them. It was a lot of drama to go eat at a fish and chips place...DS was in his crocs, mismatching short and t-shirt and he couldn't care less...well, at least for now. We'll see what kind of teenager he becomes...

[ohiomom1121]

I had a girl first, then a boy-I think you get the best of both worlds. He was a harder baby to deal with just because he was more fussy and didn't sleep well (has nothing to do with being a boy, just a more difficult baby than DD was). But he's 3 now and amazing. He's funny, outgoing and ALL BOY. Loves his trains and cars. My DD now plays trains and cars with him, and he plays princesses and dress up with her. Plus there's so much less drama with him. My DD cries a lot more, fights me on her wardrobe etc. And like PPs said, he LOVES HIS MOM! He is such a little cuddler, I actually look forward to him coming in my room every morning to climb in bed and snuggle. I think you'll find it's way easier than you're thinking. I want one more child (and always thought I'd want two girls since I never had a sister), but I definitely would prefer another boy now!

[mamicka]

I'm not even sure where to start. Boys are great! I can't imagine feeling a sense of disappointment that I was expecting a boy.

:yeahthat:

What's so great about boys? They're precious human beings that have different personalities just like girls do. He'll be your child, I don't think you need to be convinced that he'll be great.

[Globetrotter]

I was also scared about having a boy after having a girl, but I can tell you from my experience that it was the best thing that ever happened to me! It forced me to enter a whole new world, and I enjoy it. DS is very affectionate with me, while nowadays DD is giving me a lot of attitude. I love the feeling that there is a male who loves me unconditionally ;)

As others have said, not all boys are rough and tumble. Even though ds has his moments, he also likes to sit and draw and even does crafts on his own. He plays house and doctor and school, and almost anything else dd does. I've noticed that some of his friends who have big sisters tend to do these things, probably because that's how the sisters play with them :)

The clothes - I found it fun to collect clothes for ds, and it's more of a challenge to find nice ones, but they are out there! Don't worry about that part, or any of the equipment for that matter. You can always repaint the nursery.

The cousins - DS is the only male cousin on my side (of the people we meet regularly) and he LOVES the attention he gets from all the girls.

About your dd not having a sister - she will compensate by having very close "sister friends", as I call them. I don't have a sister, either, but I have a some very very close friends who serve that function. I can already see that my kids are extremely close, despite the gender difference. I know it's not quite the same as having a sister, but I think it will help them to get a perspective on the opposite gender.

Aspbergers - I can understand your worries there, but take a deep breath and see. Odds are he'll be fine.

The circumcision decision is not a big deal, really. Neither is taking care of a penis - I was worried about this (!) but it's no big deal.

Another advantage you may not have considered - As they get older (around 9 or 10), you tend to gravitate towards other moms who have the same gender - it makes it easier when you get together. This way you won't be left out of the "boy circle." I know this sounds weird, but that's been my experience!

Congratulations! You will be fine once you get used to the idea.

[Gena]

My DS is 5 now. Here are some of the things I love about having a little boy:

I have learned a ton about different types of trains, trucks, and airplanes
We get to go to train shows and touch-a-truck events
It amazes me how much he looks and acts like DH
He tries to protect me from things he thinks are scary (it's so sweet!)
His need for activity forces me to get out of the house everyday
He loves his Mommy, but wants to be like his Daddy and that's just adorable
I spend a lot less on clothes for a boy than I would for a girl
He's not picky about his clothes; as long as he has some striped shirts, he's happy.

My son does have an Autism Spectrum Disorder. He has good days and bad days and really terrible days. It's a challenge, but it has also given DS a unique perspective on the world and a quirky sense of humor. I love learning to see the world through his eyes. DS has been in various therapies since he was 2.5 and has made wonderful progress. Early Intervention has been key, so it's important to know what the early signs are. It's a good idea to be watchful about it, but don't be paranoid over it and don't let the mere idea of ASD spoil your enjoyment of your son.

[niccig]

He loves his Mommy, but wants to be like his Daddy and that's just adorable


This is DS. He's 4.5 yo and he wants to be all about Daddy - he asks Daddy what he's wearing to work, so he can put on similar clothes. But he's all about me when he wants snuggles or comforting.

[edurnemk]

I really wanted to have a girl, but I have a boy and now I wouldn't have it any other way! Don't worry about not feeling as close to him as with DD, little boys adore their momies! When they're older you probably will be closer to DD in a sense, but that doesn't mean you'll feel deattached to him. My mom came from an all-girl family and had 3 boys and 1 girl, so some things were a surprise for her but she adapted to everything.
Little boys are really active but really fun. And I'm close to my brothers, so don't worry too much about that. If you teach them to respect and love each other, they'll be fine.
As for the clothes well I'd try to start stocking up when there's a good sale. Also, maybe because he'll be the only boy in the family you'll get a lot of boy clothes as gifts.
We're planning on a second baby soon, and I really want a girl, but now that I know what having a boy is like, part of me is starting to want a boy! LOL. We plan on having 3, so I think 2 boys and a girl is a ggod combination.

[DietCokeLover]

DS came alone a mere 11 months after DD. I had a brief moment of "oh no" when I found out I was having a boy. With DCs being born in the same season, same "age" if you will one year to the next I thought it would be so easy to just buy girl clothes and share.

But, I wouldn't change things for anything in the world. DS LOVES me more than life itself I think. It is so precious to see how his eyes light up when his Mommy comes in the room. Right now, my kids are the best of friends and I hope it stays that way. They share a room at this stage and I can't imagine separating them now.

A PP said it well earlier.... he will be your baby and you are going to love him just as much as you love your DD. I wouldn't stress. And as for issues such as circ or no circ, talk to your ped, do your research and make an informed decision for yourself and your DS and then move on. Don't worry about clothes... boys can be happy and content with a few pairs of jeans shorts, t shirts and a couple pair of khaki pants! Everything pretty much matches. So easy! And think further down the road.... you won't have to pay for his wedding! You've already saved yourself $10,000+ just because you're having a boy.

[Snow mom]

I didn't see anyone mention the room sharing so I thought I'd mention I shared a room with my older brother until we were 7 and 9. I don't think there is anything wrong with little boys and girls sharing a room.

We just have one DD currently. I wanted to have a DD when I was younger, and now I don't care what sex we would have if we had a second. I think there are advantages to a second DD or a DS. So many people want one girl and one boy-- you'll be the envy of all your friends ;) Congratulations on the little boy.

[jgenie]

Speaking as a woman with three brothers - boys are great and they get better with time. I admit they were loud and obnoxious a lot when we were growing up, but I also found they were great confidantes. I wouldn't trade them and the experience of brothers for the world. All three of my brothers are very different so I have 3 experts on various topics. I can call them with a question or a problem and one of them will know the answer.

I now have a boy of my own and being a mom to a boy is AMAZING. He is a cuddly little guy that loves to hug and kiss me - he does search for dirt when we go outside, but I've learned to put on my play clothes when we go out to play. We're expecting our second child early next year, we won't find out the sex of the baby until it arrives, but it doesn't matter to either of us. I will probably always look wistfully at little girl things if we have a boy. I will also have the awesome privilege of raising young boys into wonderful men that will someday make great husbands.

[Globetrotter]

I have friends whose opposite gender kids share a room. It's doable until they get older.

[Melaine]

I don't have boys (I hope to one day), but I do have 2 brothers and 1 sister. I think it is great to grow up in a home with both! The brother/sister relationship really is a special one and we have always had lots of fun. So congrats to your family!

[sste]

I love boys too and in fact was gunning for a boy for our first. Boys do indeed love their mamas. Babyhood and toddlerhood last longer, which I think is a joy - - you get to see the development unfold more slowly. Some of the 18 month old baby girls in our playgroup looked like grown women compared to DS!

Also, jon-jons and rompers are very cute.

And last but not least, before DS, I never realized how many tractors there are in the world!

[dcmom2b3]

I don't have a DS, and, like you, was afraid at the thought. But DD's best friend is a boy who's changed my mind about all that -- he's "all boy" in the dirt, bug, and truck-loving sense, and still the sweetest, kindest, most creative little guy. Get this: he helps DD into her stroller at the end of our playdates. Not because his parents have taught him to (he's 3, a little early for those lessons), but just because he wants to help his friend.

I love him to pieces, as does DD.

[jk3]

:yeahthat:

What's so great about boys? They're precious human beings that have different personalities just like girls do. He'll be your child, I don't think you need to be convinced that he'll be great.

ITA. Just like every girl is different, every boy is unique. I have 3 and each is an individual.

[Globetrotter]

I also wanted to add that my DS is actually the neat, organized one, and he loves to help out around the house. DD is the messy one :) So much for stereotypes!!

[MommyAllison]

I was nervous to have a boy too, as I grew up with only sisters, and very few of my friends had brothers, so I just hadn't been around little boys much. I figured I'd have no idea what to do with DS. :) He's 16 months now, and a complete joy. My DD and DS are so close, they hug each other all the time and she brushes his hair, dresses him up in vests and hats, and reads him books (he loves every minute of it). The sibling bond is amazing, no matter the gender, IME. It is a total non-issue now. The biggest difference I've noticed between mine is that DS has to run off some serious energy every day or he is into *everything* and going a million miles an hour. My DD is more content to read books (she seriously could read all.day.long) - but honestly, at this point I think it is more due to his age, and his personality. And it is so fun to have a mini-DH. :) Don't worry!

[larig]

I only have one DC, DS. When we found out he was a boy, I freaked out a little. I have 2 sisters and I knew nothing about little boys. I told DH that he would have to do the potty training, as how did I know how boys peed. Fast Forward 2.5 years, and I'm the one teaching DS how to pee against a tree. And I know more about trucks and cars than I thought possible.

What I'm saying is "You will Figure it Out".

I can't imagine not having DS, and I would not trade him for the world. We're not having anymore children, I do not have any girl envy at all. Yes, SOME boys are more rough and tumble. BUT not all. I really don't like the stereotype that all boys are loud and all girls are quiet. It's just not true. Both my friends have a DD#2 that are louder then my DS.

I also agree with boys loving their mommies. DS is very snuggly.

Congratulations on your boy.
I could have said the almost exactly the same stuff (minus the peeing thing, cause DS is only 14 mos.) My DH and his sister were pretty much best friends after they were older. They have a very special relationship (she is older--5 years apart).

[arivecchi]

I actually only wanted boys and got lucky. :boogie: I love my two boys. I don't go crazy buying clothes, they have very cool toys, low maintenance, fun and so loving. I can only imagine it will get more fun as they age.

[scrooks]

I'm loving this thread! I am in the same situation. I have a DD and am really nervous about the upcoming arrival of DS. I grew up with just one sister so boys are foreign to me and I have all the same concerns.

This thread is making me excited about all of the positives about little boys! :yay:

[elephantmeg]

not as much drama
clothes are easy and cheaper :)
less teenage angst.

I have a brother and adore him-we're super close. My 2 are super close too

[Kitten007]

I have two boys and I completely love them sooo much!!! I always wanted a girl to pass along my Disney Princess things.....but God decided I need my little men first. Maybe one day I will have a girl.

I have never been really serious...always acting goofy and having fun (even with my old co-workers). Boys just love it to be chased, tickled, tossed up and down...etc.... I have the most wonderful time!

BOYS = Lots and lots of playing and running = SEXY MAMA BODY!!!!!
(The best weight loss program!)

[kijip]

:yeahthat:

What's so great about boys? They're precious human beings that have different personalities just like girls do. He'll be your child, I don't think you need to be convinced that he'll be great.

I agree.

This is not a matter of "you get what you get", it is a matter of "you love what you get with every ounce of your being".

Once you have your son, you won't be able to imagine life without him and you won't trade him got a million girls. Just like it was with your daughter.

[ChunkyNicksChunkyMom]

I was pretty sure I would only have one child since I didn't first get pregnant until I was 41.
I wanted a girl SO badly that when I found out the baby was a boy I was really, really let down. Fast forward 17 months when I find out the sex of second child. By this time I am so crazy about boys I am sad that the second is a girl- seriously!!! Was even sad when I found out my friend's last child was a girl. I guess there is a part of me with another boy "left on the table" so to speak.

[JBaxter]

not as much drama
clothes are easy and cheaper :)
less teenage angst.

I have a brother and adore him-we're super close. My 2 are super close too



LOL DIFFERENT angst!

[infomama]

What's so great about boys? They're precious human beings that have different personalities just like girls do. He'll be your child, I don't think you need to be convinced that he'll be great.
Well said.

[deborah_r]

I love my two short and scrawny boys. And they don't beat up on other kids at the playground or run wild. Not all girls are sweet and calm, and not all boys are erratic monkeys.

[goldenpig]

Of course I'll love him just as much as I love my daughter, I never meant to imply that I wouldn't. I still can't wait to meet him and once he's here I'm sure I'll forget that I ever wanted another girl. Like I said as long as he's healthy and growing that's what matters most. My fear of having a boy is nothing compared to my fear of having something go wrong like a miscarriage or stillbirth (but we'll save that for another thread). It's just a little anxiety about the unknown...something I hadn't expected or feel prepared for...and I just wanted to get a little BTDT insight and reassurance. Thanks everyone for your support and keep the stories coming...it's making me more excited about having a little dino-man on the way!

[thomma]

I have one of each and could go on and on about what is so great about each of them. However ds is the one who wants to build a house in our backyard so he can live near mommy and daddy forever. :love5:

I will also tell you that I grew up with 3 siblings. While I am close to my sister, I had a special bond with my brother who was a year younger than me. We were inseparable as preteens and very close as adults. My brother died a year ago and I miss him every single minute of every single day. My dd and ds are very close and I hope it stays that way.

good luck-
Kim

[shawnandangel]

Congratulations on your pregnancy!!

I just wanted to add that I think it is perfectly acceptable for sisters and brothers to share a room up until a certain age. I don't think there is a cut off age, you will just know when it is time, so that's totally not something I would fret about right now!

Boy clothes can be fun to shop for too! There are times I'm walking through a baby store and get little pangs when I see an adorable boy outfit. Especially at Christmas time, getting him all dressed up like a little man! Awww!!!!

Maybe to help you get more excited you could buy a book like this one http://www.amazon.com/Dangerous-Book-Boys-Conn-Iggulden/dp/0061243582/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1252197372&sr=1-1 on Amazon. Then you can start daydreaming about all the wonderful things you will get to do with your little man!

[pb&j]

I freaked out a little when we found out DS was on his way - I only have a sister, and only girl cousins on my mom's side; DH only has nieces. I had no idea what we were going to do with a boy! But boy oh boy is it fun having a boy! I have a new appreciation for firetrucks and tractors.

He is all boy! I just give him a lot of food, let him run around, and make sure all his toys have wheels. Haircuts are easy, we just ask the barber for a "little boy's cut." Clothes are easy, as long as there's a picture of a truck, tractor, or airplane on it.

But he is a sensitive little soul, too. He is kind, considerate, and thoughtful. One night, DD was crying in her crib, and before I could get upstairs to her, he had snuck in her room and brought her his favorite little toys to try to make her happy.

So I only have good things to say about having a boy so far!

ETA: He has a cool name, if I do say so myself. Very masculine, but not run of the mill.

EATA: Three words: Monster Truck Jam. :)

[Naranjadia]

I have boy and girl twins, so I have been blessed to experience both at the same time.

Boys are wonderful for all the reasons people have mentioned. They can be wild and raucous, but also sensitive and thoughtful. My son is always looking out for his sister. This evening DH was lifting him to see the deer out on the neighbors lawn. Sally had had a turn, but after a minute, Leo says "Daddy, it's Sally's turn again."

The other funny thing is that it has caused me to see things in new ways. PP have mentioned learning truck names, etc. The other day I was at the hospital for a doctor's appointment and I found myself staring at the construction cranes for about 5 minutes. It was like a beautiful ballet. I don't think I would have looked at them with the same eyes if it weren't for my son.

[goldenpig]

Kim, sorry to hear about your brother's passing. I'm glad you were able to have such a close relationship with your brother. I hope my DD and DS will be as close as you and your brother were and your DC are.
Ry, now you have me curious--what is your son's name? My husband's top pick (and only so far) is Alexander. Currently I'm leaning towards Henry. The problem is we have such a common last name that anything we pick, there will probably be a thousand other kids with the same exact name. I like names that are a bit more unique (like Felix or Dexter) but my husband tends to like just the basics, especially for boy names.

[SpaceGal]

I have three kids, my frist two are boys and the third is a girl. Our third was unplanned and unexpected...and I totally thought she would be another boy. DH's family mainly has boys so it was surprising to have a girl...in fact this year is the year of the girl...every one is having a girl including two of my SILs.

As for boys I was so much less worried about having a boy than a girl. DS #1 loves us to bits and he's very close to us. He's a little guy...short for his age and skinny but it's okay...he sticks up for himself and is really a tough kid.

Personally, I was relieved to have boys (well the first two times around) other than the circ issue, there is much less to worry about. Changing a boys diaper is easier I feel like, with my DD, I am so conscious of wiping just one direction, with a boy it's easier. I never had an issue of my boys peeing on me...possibly because I chose to not circ.

Someone once told me, have a boy you worry about your boy, have a girl and you worry about ALL the boys. Kind of funny but very true later in life. Boys are easier...when it comes to shopping. When DD came along I was terrified at the choices/options available for girls...it was totally overwhelming for me and plus I wasn't quite the girly girl. I love shopping for her but man it's hard to not buy too much. I am glad to have a girl now but trust me I worry about her much more than my boys...especially for later in life, girl stuff like developing, periods, and just being a "woman", sadly I feel like I have to be more protective lately with all the crazy Jaycee stuff in the news too...seems like a lot of sickos like girls better so that makes me nervous....but life goes on.

Both my sons are so different, one is totally friendly, outgoing, roly poly and a clown, the other is a bit more apprehensive of strangers, shy in his way, skinny bones, smart, but also a clown. They fight but get a long great and they love their baby sister to bits. They are always looking out for her. Boys are great...so don't worry it's probably daunting but all it is the fact that it's different than what you already have. I have a friend with two girls and she is terrified of having another and if it's a boy she wouldn't know what to do she says...it's basically all that we are used to. I felt that way about having a girl too.

It will be a nice change and of course an adjustment but it's gonna be fine. :) Exciting and CONGRATS on your baby boy!

[happymom]

DH has 5 brothers (!!) and 2 sisters. That house is so much fun to hang out by. Each of his brothers (and DH too) take such good care of their Momma. My SIL's are great too, but growing up they were whiny and high maintenance, while the boys were fun and hilarious.

I only have a DD right now. If I ever have a boy, I think I would be thrilled that I would be "forced" to go buy him a whole wardrobe, rather than just reusing DD's clothes.

Youre gonna have a great time decorating your DS's nursery- there are sooo many adorable boy nurseries out there. Check out the nursery pics thread on this board. There are some adorable firetruck and car themed nurseries.

When you get up to choosing a name, you can always start a name thread on this baord for some help. Those are so much fun!

[tnrnchick74]

I don't have any other children except DS...and I REALLY wanted a girl when I was pregnant. But now I can't imagine anything else. Each boy is different, the sterotypes don't always hold true. I have a big, "bruiser" who is also very sensitive.

And it is what you make it. I refuse to dress DS in the "boring" plaids/stripes. I find or make creative clothing. I named him a creative name. Having a boy doesn't necessarily mean all blue/brown, boring anything.

Congrats on the boy!

[mom2beofboy/girltwins]

When I found out I was having boy/girl twins I was worried that I would "favor" her since I had always wanted a little girl after growing up with 3 brothers (two of which were considerably younger than me).

Ironically, it's almost turned out the opposite! He's so cute and silly it makes him soooo loveable and he's starting to turn into somewhat of a Mommy's boy and it actually seems like she favors daddy.

So don't worry and pre-judge too much - it may surprise you how sweet he'll be!

[smilequeen]

You know I'd feel the same way if I found out I was having a girl now. I always pictured myself as a girl mom, and I had 2 boys and found out I was really a boy mom. I love it!

For one, I think boys are a blast to shop for. Sometimes I look at the little girl clothes, but man! you have to weed through a lot of totally inappropriate stuff to find the cute girl stuff these days. The stores don't stock as much boy stuff, but I've found it to be a fun challenge dressing my boys. And when you find the right places, almost everything they have tends to be cute.

As for boys being wild and rough and tumble. As a boy mom, you'll look at it differently. It's totally in a different frame. They are energetic and fun and active. Their toys are more fun (to me). And if I had a girl I'd have to reframe how I feel about their moodiness and the fact that girls can just be plain mean. I find that the girls around my boys can be so quiet and sneaky and can really hurt feelings. While the boys might be louder and more active, they wear their hearts on their sleeve. My boys are so sweet and caring and helpful. And to be completely honest, all of this is more about personality than gender anyway...even if it's hard not to make generalizations.

I have a brother, no sisters, and we are very close. Just as close as DH and his brother. And I have female cousins that are like sisters to me, so I never missed out on that. I'm close to my mom and maybe closer than my brother, but he's still close to her. My mom had 4 brothers and they all stayed close and their wives were sometimes even closer to my grandma than they were. My grandma had a huge number of people that loved and cared for her and she had a very rough final few years. And little boys, they do SO love their mommies.

Anyway, I understand your fears, but I think you'll be surprised at how amazing a son really is.

[ast96]

Baby boys do not exit the womb as five year olds. They are just baby boys -- the same as baby girls except with penises. Trust me, you will have a long time to adjust and learn as you go along.

I find that families with just one boy -- especially boys with an older sister -- tend to have less chaos than my household of three little boys bouncing off one another. I was an older sister to a younger brother, and my brother was neat, clean, and not aggressive. But he was the nightmare teenager, not me.

I don't think all boys love their mamas. It hurts when people say that all the time. I struggle with my older two, especially my oldest. He loves me, but he is skeptical of me, doubts me, more like a daughter stereotypically does her mother. My youngest is a mama's boy, though -- he does love me. That's not a universal thing to boys, though. Kids are different, just like adults. They come in all varieties.

Just be excited about the baby. He doesn't need a bunch of blue stuff. He just needs you. And whether you circ or not, in the long run? Really doesn't matter all that much. Research, pick, and go with a choice.

I would have loved to have had a daughter, but I wouldn't trade one of my boys for a girl. I understand gender disappointment. What I have a hard time understanding when it comes to gender disappointment is why anyone wouldn't want both experiences. I always wanted to try one of each, at least. They're both so wonderful. To me, you are hitting the jackpot.

[Jacksmommy2b]

What a cool thread!

Op - I totally get where you are coming from. I would have been feeling the exact same way if this baby was a girl. IDK what to do with a girl, I have no girl stuff, don't know the names of all the princesses, can barely get my own hair tamed and styled, etc. LOL.

Like a bunch of the PPs said - I'm sure your son won't mind hanging out in a pink pack-in-play, but don't deny yourself the fun of buying in blue. :) there is some super adorable boy stuff out there. You can always score some fantastic stuff on craigslist or on consignment if you are worried about the cost of a nursery remodel or a whole new wardrobe. As far as the stroller, I forgot to see how old your DD is, but what about buying a double?

Jack is such a delight. He is my sweet snuggly love, we go out to lunch and practice being a gentleman. We do workbooks and play with his playmobil sets and go to museums. He reserves all his rough and tumble insanity for playtime with daddy. I am stoked to be having another son and am already daydreaming of football practices and camping trips.

I know how you feel about the circ debate. I remember praying for a girl when pregnant with J just to avoid having that fight with DH. In our case, it did end up being a battle - but we ended it by doing independant research to back up our preferences and presenting our case to the other. I did a ton of research (using only reputable medical journals or traceable statistics) of HIV rates amongst men in the US and equally developed countries that do not routinely circ, rates of penile cancer in those same groups, care of both circ'ed and intact boys, methods and effectiveness of pain relief - etc.

We ended up deciding against the circ and like others have said - it is almost funny how little of an issue it is now. New baby will be intact as well and I don't think it has even been mentioned by DH besides 'don't forget to put that in your birth plan'.

If you decide to do your own research - just be wary, there are a lot of really crazy people on both sides of the fence.

Good luck with everything!

[Veronica's Mommy]

I wanted another girl too. In fact, we weren't going to have another at all- I joked "If you can promise it will be another girl, we can have another". Then lo & behold I got pregnant anyway. I cried, I was terrified, worried that it would be a boy. So your emotions are TOTALLY VALID AND REAL.
But guess what, I got used to the idea of having another kid, and that it might go either way. Then when we found out it was a boy. Guess what? I was overjoyed. It's just an amazing moment seeing that baby on the screen, that all my reservations went away. I can't guarantee that you will feel the same way, it can take some time. But you will love him, trust that you will.
But to answer your question, what's so great about boys? So far (DS is only 4 months) I gotta say not much. What's great is he's mine. It's a baby, your baby, and you will have highs and lows just like with your girl. I still look at him all the time and think- "A boy, what am I gonna do with a boy???" And then he smiles at me and then I know the answer is simply "love him".
All said though... I'm still glad I had my daughter first. :love-retry:

ETA: What to do about the circ issue was probably one of my initial worries too. Don't put yourself through endless worry over it. I knew how I felt but then left the final decision to DH. Of course, I gave him the info and he sided with me, but really it's no big deal. Save that discussion for later, much later, no need to worry about it now.
Good luck!

[MoJo]

I just wanted to add that I shared a room with my younger brother and younger sister until I was in 1st grade, and it didn't cause any more trouble than sharing a room with any siblings.

There are plenty of themes both boys and girls may enjoy, such as animals, cartoons, etc.

My DH thinks the "perfect" family is a girl first, then a boy. The older girl tends to look out for the younger children regardless of gender, but many boys are protective of their families even as preschoolers.

If we have a next child, DH wants to name him "Liam" or "Lian," a take off of William (a family name, on both sides) but not as common, because our last name is super common too.

Best wishes!

[Alice523]

With my boys, life is an adventure. They are very active and experience everything with enthusiasm. Our home is never quiet (or clean)! My friends have very active and joyful daughters, and I know that most qualities are individual personality traits, but I love the intensity level of the boys we know. Parenting a son has helped me relax in many ways, and I feel much more rough-and-tumble myself.

I get such joy out of watching my DH interact with them and show them special "boy" activities that he remembers fondly. Last weekend, we discovered that our 3yo can hit a plastic baseball really well. That was SO much more fun for me than I ever thought it would be!

My oldest can be wild; he's a "boy" boy. There were moments in his toddlerhood that I thought I'd die because he was once again trying to jump off of something four times his height. He never seemed to pause for even a moment and we used to be the butt of all the playgroup jokes about what he'd be up to next. Now that he's almost four, he has mellowed out a lot. He still prefers to act "vicious" and "violent" in his play, but I also hear him consoling his Captain Hook figurine when he puts it in jail. ;) He loooves books, helps friends up when they fall, and makes his bed every morning. Boys are sensitive and conscientious and kind, just like girls.

I do hope we are blessed with a girl. There are so many things I look forward to sharing with a daughter, and I'll be sad if I don't get the chance. There's a little piece of me, though, that gets a thrill out of the thought that we might have a house full of boys. I have come to love parenting sons!

[lorinick]

I'll start by saying when I was having my first child and I found out he was a boy I was sad. I knew nothing about boys and was sad I wouldn't be having a girl. I quickly got over it. DS one is full of energy and is daring. When I finally got pergnant with ds2 after years of trying and many scares later. Nothing matted but having a healthy baby and dc2 is a boy. He is very laid back and calm, a snuggle bug. I always get comments about how good he is. Both are boys and they are so different.

I love little girls but they seem to have a lot of drama. But I would be happy with either sex. As you will when baby boy arrives. And you will have enough love for both children. All mom's think about that when then go from 1 to 2 children no matter what the sex is. And there is always enough love.

[mommylamb]

Ya know, I think each child is just different, and that it's important not to get hung up on gender stereotypes. I have a DS, and I found it kind of hard to read the original post because I love my boy so much and I can't imagine not wanting him or prefering someone other than him.

As for the clothes- when I found out I was having a boy I was a little bummed about missing out on some of the girl clothes, but now I like the boy clothes more any way. Even if I have a girl some day, I'd never dress her in all pink. In fact, I'd avoid pink as much as possible. I think it's awful. (I do like purple though). My DS actually loves yellow. He's only 2, but he asks to wear yellow every day. This has been going on for months now.

I can understand your fear about ASD, especially with asperger's in your DH's family. But, it's the risk you take when you have a child that there could be some health problem, and chances are he'll be fine.

I don't know... I love my DS so much, I can't even begin to describe why. But, it's not because he's a boy. It's because he's my DS and he's wonderful. And when I have a second child I will adore them for who they are too.

[KHF]

I don't have time to read through all six pages of posts, but I just wanted to share that I felt the EXACT same way when I found out I was having a boy. I had DD first and had a gazillion clothes, toys, gear that I wanted to re-use. I had so much fun dressing DD and had formed such a bond with her, that I couldn't imagine a little boy. All the way up to his birth, I felt that way. I felt TERRIBLE for feeling that way too. I knew in my heart that it would all be OK when he arrived...and it was.

He is the easiest, sweetest and most gentle little baby ever. As difficult as DD was as a baby, DS has been that easy. And boy, does he love his mama...even at just 8 months.

I'm not sure why I had always envisioned having 2 girls, but I did. Now that DS is here, i can't imagine it any other way. I think it has also helped with DD's jealousy. If it were another little girl, I'm not sure she'd be as adoring. But she has never had one moment of jealousy since he has arrived. She loves him dearly.

I just wanted to say that I've BTDT and come through it just fine. I freaked about the circ/no circ thing too, but once I read up on it, I decided against it. And like a PP said, it has been such a non-issue, I can't imagine why I ever stressed over it in the first place. DH knew I did my research, and trusted my decision.

If you need to talk to someone who has been through it, feel free to PM me. I totally understand where you are coming from!

[HHCs Mom]

I have two boys and they are SOOOOO sweet and LOVE their mama. :) You just don't know baby boy love until you have one! It's the best! I get teary eyed just thinking about how sweet they are. I have 2 little boyfriends at my house who love hugs and kisses! ;) I always thought of myself as a girl mama but wouldn't trade my boys for anything in the world. I was surprised and will admit a bit disappointed when I found out DS1 was a boy but got over it and now I can't imagine anything different. My boys are 5 and 2 and love to hug on each other and most of the time are very, very sweet together.

Consider dressing them a challenge for you --- finding cute, sweet boy clothes is hard but it can be fun to give yourself that challenge, too.

Congrats on your sweet boy! :)

[baileygirl]

I love my two boys! Today the older one (2.5) told said "I love you soooo much Mommy" and came over and gave me a hug and kiss about 10 times this morning. What more could you ask for?