Do You Kiss DC On The Mouth?

[shawnandangel]

http://news.aol.com/article/italian-father-arrested-in-brazil-for/658378?icid=main|hp-laptop|dl1|link2|http%3A%2F%2Fnews.aol.com%2Fartic le%2Fitalian-father-arrested-in-brazil-for%2F658378

The above is a story I just read about a father being arrested in Brazil for kissing his 8 year old daughter on the mouth. The mother and daughter both say nothing bad happened, that it was an innocent kiss.

I was kissed on the mouth (closed) as a child and see nothing wrong with a parent/grandparent kissing a child.

So do you ever kiss your DC on the mouth? At what age does it become not appropriate?

For me, I think it would depend on the age of the child.

[Corie]

My husband and I have always kissed our kids on the lips. I've never given
it a thought. Our daughter is 7 yrs. old and our son is 4 years old.

[lchang25000]

I don't usually kiss DS on the mouth, but very close to it.

[maestramommy]

We don't, but I know in many cultures it's quite common. So even though I voted no it's not because I don't think it's appropriate. It's just not something that we would do.

[fivi2]

I generally don't intend to, but my girls will occasionally plant one on my lips or dh's. I don't tell them not to. It doesn't really bother me if it is me or dh (my girls are 3.5). I do get a little skeeved out when grandparents (or other) kiss them on the lips. So, I am not sure where I fit on the poll.

[kristenk]

I voted No, but I think the poll reason for "No" is stronger than my opinion.

When I was little, my parents kissed me on the lips. I still remember when my mom decided to switch from the lips to the cheek, forehead, whatever. I'm guessing I was 8 or so? Anyway, as a very sensitive child, I didn't understand why she changed and it really hurt me. I didn't want to do the same thing to my DD, so chose to kiss DD on the cheek, forehead, etc.

If someone chooses to kiss their kids on the lips, I see nothing wrong with it, though. It's just not right for me and my family.

FIL would kiss DD on the lips when she was young and I didn't like that. I think if your parents don't kiss a child on his/her lips, other relatives should respect that decision and follow suit. Just my opinion.

[Raidra]

I have no problem with kissing my kids on the lips. We're very affectionate and demonstrative, and the kids seem perfectly okay with it and seek our affection. I don't have a problem with other relatives kissing them, either. If a stranger kissed them, then yeah, I'd be weirded out, but that's obvious.

I don't understand why people think it's inappropriate to kiss kids on the lips. I'm assuming it's a sexual thing, which is just creepy.. do people really think that when I kiss my kids on the lips, that I'm thinking of them in a sexual way? It seems really weird that some people would sexualize such an innocent thing as a kiss, especially in relation to children.

ETA: In response to Kristen's post.. I don't understand why a person would switch from kissing on the lips to not. Most of my whole family kisses everyone (adults included) on the lips when greeting or saying good-bye, and it's not weird at all. Huh.

[kristenk]

ETA: In response to Kristen's post.. I don't understand why a person would switch from kissing on the lips to not. Most of my whole family kisses everyone (adults included) on the lips when greeting or saying good-bye, and it's not weird at all. Huh.

I don't really know either. I just remember that it happened and was very confusing for me.

In response to the original post, I wonder how much it depends on how you grew up? I know that's the big reason I made the choice that I did.

[edurnemk]

I voted no, because we don't do it, but I understand in some cutures/families it's done and it's appropriate.
About the article, I lived in Latin America most of my life, and I understand how it would shock the brazilians to see that. In LA, parents don't kiss children or babies on the lips, and they're not used to seeing that. A kiss on the lips is something exclusive of a romantic relationship to them (and well, for our family, too).

[almostmom]

We never kissed on the lips growing up, but my DH's family did. So he kisses the kids on the lips, and I started to sometimes too. Since that's the only kind of kisses they see (b/w DH and me), they think it's totally normal. DH also feels it is totally normal, but it still feels funny to me. So I changed to kissing DS on the cheek, and he definitely noticed! He grabs my face sometimes to kiss on the lips - I guess he felt bad about as the PP mentioned.

It seems like it does depend on how you grew up.

[vonfirmath]

My parents kissed me on the mouth when we were little, but I remember distinctly a conversation when they stopped doing it, saying we should reserve that for our future husband. They started kissing us on the cheek and most of the time, since, that's what I have done too.

I don't freak if, with a little kid, it ends up as a kiss on the mouth. But I've taught my son that kisses are cheek or nose-to-nose. (So most of our "kisses" are actually nose kisses)

[BelleoftheBallFlagstaff]

My dad and I kissed on the lips until he died, and I was almost 30! I don't see anything wrong with it. My DH and I kiss DD on the lips all the time.

[doberbrat]

I prefer to kiss dd elsewhere, but dont make a big deal about it when she kisses me on the lips. I think it bothers dh a bit more. No one else really kisses her since our family is all out of state.

[SnuggleBuggles]

Dh and I kiss the boys on the mouth (closed).

I have a friend who won't kiss her dcs on the mouth because of germs. Never even thought of that...and wouldn't change because of it.

Beth

[mom2one]

I grew up only kissing on the cheek, and my parents kissing me back that way. So when we had our DS, we kissed him on the cheek. DS noticed that mommy and daddy kiss on the lips, so he wanted to also. He would take my head and turn it, so we could kiss on the lips. I thought that was very sweet of my little guy. It is only between me and him. So we do the occassional kiss on the lips now that he is older, but most are on the cheeks, nose, etc.

[aa2mama]

Both my kids kissed people on the lips when they were babies/toddlers. Now that DS is getting older (5), he only kisses on the cheeks but DD (2) still only kisses people on the lips. I have a feeling that she will grow out of it as she gets older, too, but who knows. As a kid, my family only kissed on the cheeks, so I suppose I am more comfortable with that, but I don't think it is inappropriate to kiss on the lips.

[Asianmommy]

When they were little, I kissed them on the mouth. Now that they're in school, I kiss their cheeks.

[Corie]

I have a feeling that she will grow out of it as she gets older, too, but who knows.


You never know! My daughter will be 8 years old in November and she
is always puckering up for a kiss. It doesn't bother her at all to kiss me
(or DH) on the lips.

You should see both of my kids in bed at night waiting for their good-night kisses.
All you can see is this big pucker peeking out of the sheets. :)

[ThreeofUs]

Geez, I'd never call it age inappropriate, but there was a high premium on not sharing germs in my family, so we didn't.

Now, I'll get kisses any way I can - and it's usually DH and DS1 that get us all sick anyway, so I'm willing to risk it.

[elephantmeg]

my parents didn't but mom's parents did-and kissed us on the mouth. To me it was just yucky as a small child-grandpa smelled of vicks or halls or something and was always expectorating. eww

[moonsky]

No, but it is for medical reason. We don't want to spread any germs to them if they are any. Sometimes, you have it before the symptom shows.

[Pennylane]

I don't and my parents did not. I guess I think that is reserved for spouses or boyfriend/girlfriends. It doesn't freak me out to see it though when children are small. When they are older (10 or more) I think it is kind of strange.

Ann

[nov04]

We don't do it at our house. I know I've missed with my mom and we ended kissing on the mouth, no big deal. And the kids sometimes want to plant on on my lips, I go for their cheek.

I don't see a problem with other families that do this. It's what they're comfortable with.

[Cam&Clay]

No way! My parents were very affectionate and still are. We kiss cheeks, foreheads, top of the head only. My ex-DH's family kissed on the lips and it used to freak me out. Something just bugged me about a 30 year old man kissing his mother on the mouth.

With my DC, I love kissing cheeks! They are so squishy!

I guess it's all about how you were raised.

[kijip]

No, I don't. I don't think it is inappropriate, it is just not something that is done in my family so I don't do it. It's just not part of our family culture.

[Nooknookmom]

We have always kissed both girls on the lips, cheek, nose, etc! However, when they told us to "kiss them on the cheek instead", their wishes are **always** granted.

My 2 yo does not like lip kisses and will only kiss us (DH, sister & me) on the cheek, go figure, DD1 was around 4 or 5 before she said that.

When I was growing up my Mom actually got upset w/ me when I kissed her (accidentally) on the mouth. I was told that we "don't do that" and I never did it again!!!

[newg]

DH and I are comfortable kissing DD on the mouth, but she's only 18 months, so it's not "truly" and mouth kiss.....sometimes a nose, tooth.....whatever we get...!! I think DH and I are okay kissing DD (closed mouth pucker) but I don't want anyone else kissing DD on the mouth.............for germs and comfort reasons...........

[R2sweetboys]

Yes, we do kiss the boys on the lips and I've never thought anything of it. My family does as well, no prob there either. :shrug: I guess it really must be related to how one has grown up b/c the thought of it being inappropriate has never ever occurred to me.

[BelleoftheBallFlagstaff]

Yes, we do kiss the boys on the lips and I've never thought anything of it. My family does as well, no prob there either. :shrug: I guess it really must be related to how one has grown up b/c the thought of it being inappropriate has never ever occurred to me.

:yeahthat:
I never though about it being "inappropriate" or "creepy "until I read this thread. I will continue to not see it that way, to each their own I guess.

[Tammy]

Yes, both DH and I kiss DD on the lips. Always have. And grandparents and cousins do as well. Anyone outside the family though, I'm uncomfortable with.

[TwinFoxes]

Yes, we do kiss the boys on the lips and I've never thought anything of it. My family does as well, no prob there either. :shrug: I guess it really must be related to how one has grown up b/c the thought of it being inappropriate has never ever occurred to me.

:yeahthat: Until I read this thread, it never occurred to me that there are people who DON'T kiss their kids on their lips! My mom and I kissed on the lips until she passed away. I was already in my 30s. To each their own.

[amandabea]

:yeahthat:
I never though about it being "inappropriate" or "creepy "until I read this thread. I will continue to not see it that way, to each their own I guess.

:yeahthat:
I never thought about it. It's just what we do.

[ett]

I voted no, but not for the reason stated as I know that it is common in other cultures. My parents never kissed us on the lips when we were young, so it's not something we do in our family either. And I agree with a PP that I love kissing DS's on their squishy cheeks!

[Canna]

We do not kiss our children on the mouth at any age - I was never kissed on the mouth by my parents either. To me it feels wrong.

My MIL periodically tries to kiss our kids on the mouth and I really don't like it. It kind of creeps me out from a hygeine standpoint more than a sexual one, I think.

[gatorsmom]

I grew up kissing my parents on the cheeks so that is what I am most comfortable with. But DH starting kissing the kids on the lips and so that is what we all do now. I don't see a thing wrong with it other than the germ factor. I am always afraid I'm going to give a cold to my kids by kissing them on the lips instead of the cheek but actually, they could probably get a cold either way. :)

[elizabethkott]

Yes, i kiss J on the lips. He went through a phase when he was about a year when he would try to give "open mouth" kisses - - complete with tongue!!! We put a stop to that pretty quickly!!! He really only gives me and his babysitter kisses on the mouth, but occasionally he'll mouth-kiss DH too.
My parents never did on-the-mouth kisses with me or my brother, fwiw.

[sste]

DS only kisses me on the lips and I often kiss him on the lips as well. I don't know how I will feel when he is 12 but at 22 months I am enjoying my sweet baby kisses!

[neobunny]

I don't do it mostly because of the germy-ness of it. Then again my DS is still a baby (10 months old).

[rosiegirl1]

I would have said no, never, but my 6mo LO started giving me open-mouth kisses a month ago, and they fall wherever they land...haha.

[SnuggleBuggles]

:yeahthat:
I never though about it being "inappropriate" or "creepy "until I read this thread. I will continue to not see it that way, to each their own I guess.

:yeahthat: Sometimes little things I hear on the boards get in my brain and make me overthink things. Not going to happen here. I won't let it. :)

Beth

[stefani]

No, it is not part of my family culture (Chinese / Asian) to kiss children on the mouth, but having spent so many years in the US, I am not bothered by lips kissing on a child, except for the sharing germ issues. DS occasionally teases me and DH by sticking out his tongue, and no, I don't want his kiss then :-)

Except for SO (Significant Others), we kiss cheeks.

[khalloc]

I kiss my kids all the time, everywhere. Cheek, lips, forehead, etc...I am very affectionate. It never even OCCURRED to me that some people would think kissing on the lips is wrong. And I am not from a cultured background. Just a regular old caucasian american. My DH kisses DCs on the lips also. Not all the time, but about the same as he does on their cheeks. My parents will still kiss me on the lips once in awhile. I dont see anything wrong with it.

My DC are a DD who is almost 4 and a DS who is 18 months. I imagine DS will not want to lip-kiss when he hits a certain age, so I have to get it all in now!!

[mominma]

It was interesteding this was brought up becuase it is a difference between the way my husband and I were brought up.

The first time I saw my husband say goodbye to his sister (she lives in another state) they gave eachother a kiss on the lips and I was in total shock. I have also noticed his father use to kiss him on the lips. I just do not think it looks right for a grown man to kiss anyone on the lips besides his wife!

I think it has come up so much between us that he is so aware of it he usually kisses on the cheek. He said growing up, he kissed his parents, aunts, etc on the lips.

I always kiss my kids on the cheek or head, I do not like kissing my kids on their lips, something about it is just not right to me.

[mommyp]

We kiss DD on the lips (and all over her face). I've never thought anything of it. My parents often did with me too, sometimes still. We avoid it when sick though!