I need my mouth soaped up...

[Radosti]

DS1 learned a new word from me today. I am officially a bad mom. I am 7.5 mo pregnant. DH got stuck driving behind a particularly pissy driver. The guy decided DH was too close, so slammed on the breaks. DH slammed on the breaks causing my stomach to keep traveling forward while the rest of me remained restrained by the belt. Very unpleasant. I told DH to back off, but now it was ON for some reason and DH chose to follow the guy much closer than before and the guy to go 5 miles per hour. DS2 was asleep so I called both my DH and the guy in front of us immature. The other guy had no way of hearing me, BTW. Anyway, get to a light, we're going left, the guy is going right. So, we ended up next to him. I turn to look and he's hanging out his window screaming at ME!!! Like I am the reason he's ticked off??? I got ticked and called him a F***. Then we turned and I knew it was a bad thing to say in front of DS1, but too late. DS1 immediately pipes up...
"Mama, why did you say f***?"
"Mama, why did you make that face while saying it?"
"Mama, what's F***?"
"Mama, F***, F***, F***"

I explained that I was very upset and should not have used that word, he said it a few more times until I threatened to take away a privilege. That was the end of that. I went food shopping later on. Came home and DH tells me that he told DS1 that he can only watch one more Tom & Jerry before bedtime. DS1 responded with dropping the F bomb. DH tried talking to him, and DS1 came back with "Mama said it when she was upset, and now I'm upset, so I can say it!!!" DH ended up threatening to cut out snuggle time before bed if DS1 didn't stop saying it.

So, how's that for horrible mommy award nomination???

[StantonHyde]

The ultimate question is: Did they use it correctly in a sentence?? :p

Sorry, but that is one I have used before and I could use again in front of my kids--it truly is one of my favorite words. So far, I guess I am saying it under my breath because they only comment on another word that I am not able to stop when I am really frustrated.

One of my favorites with that word was a friend at work who had a 5-7 year old and her ex-H calls her to tell her little princess just said "WTF?" when he told her she couldn't have another piece of candy!!! And he knew where she learned it. I could just hear this little voice saying that.

I know, I am vicariously contributing to the delinquency of a minor, but I do find it funny. (And I would have whacked my DH for that episode)

[Melbel]

I cringe for you! When I was pregnant with DD1 and DS was about 18 months, I let the F bomb slip under my breath because I injured myself. When pregnant, I have greater difficulty with my internal filter - things I would never say somehow slip from in my head to out of my mouth. Fortunately, DS started saying "duck", one of his words at the time, so I responded, "where is that duck?"

Maybe you could tell him if he (or you) say it again, you will have to wash the offending mouth out with soap. It is a punishment that has worked for friends.

:hug:

[Radosti]

Oh yeah, DH had me rolling on the floor when he told me the story, but I am horrified of him going to preschool on Monday and repeating it. If he says it today, he'll get the threat of soap or pepper in his mouth. Oy... My filter really is so much worse now that I am in the third trimester. Fun.

[KBecks]

Just ignore it. If you make it a big deal it makes it worse.

Do not cut out snuggle time!

He will not be the first child at school who has said a bad word, this stuff happens, and life will go on, it will be OK!!!!

I would NEVER put soap or pepper in a child's mouth. Please don't do that. This is not his fault. Be gentle with him and wait for the phase to pass.

[ha98ed14]

DH tried talking to him, and DS1 came back with "Mama said it when she was upset, and now I'm upset, so I can say it!!!"

Look at it this way: His deductive reasoning skills are thoroughly developed, so you know he ain't no dummy!

I don't think you should be so hard on yourself. Personally, I think there are worse things than swearing. Is he a mean spirited, malicious kid? I think that is far worse than a kid who experiments with the F word.

[elliput]

Ugh. :hug: I understand how you feel. DD says "dammit" and "gad dammit". Not quite as bad as the f-bomb, but still not exactly something I want her saying in school.

You know what gets me about this type of thing? We try to model using good words (please, thank you, etc) all the time and kids have to be constantly reminded to do the same, but we let out one curse word in an intense moment and the kid internalizes it and repeats it for.freaking.ever. :banghead:

[elliput]

I would NEVER put soap or pepper in a child's mouth. Please don't do that. This is not his fault. Be gentle with him and wait for the phase to pass.

This has me scratchin' my head, Karen. In the thread title, Rada said she should soap up her own mouth, not her kid's mouth. And I can't seem to see anywhere in the post where she even implies that she would do anything of the sort.

[Radosti]

Yup, pleases and thank you's are a constant struggle here... Go figure.

[dcmom2b3]

but we let out one curse word in an intense moment and the kid internalizes it and repeats it for.freaking.ever. :banghead:

There's a psycho-linguistic reason for that, but f*ck it all, I can't remember exactly what it is. Something about things said with emphasis making more of an impression exclusive of intrisinc meaning? I do remember my linguistics professor telling our class about her child's first F-bomb.

Rada, :hug::hug:. DD says "motherscratcher" cuz that's my go to half cleaned up swear word. But it puzzled the nuns at preschool. I kept my head down and pretended I didn't hear her . . .:bag

[maestramommy]

:hysterical:I'm sorry Rada, I shouldn't laugh, but it IS so funny.

Just the other day, Dora said, "shoot!" In the right context. 2 days later she said, "good grief!" Now shoot is her favorite expression of frustration. I told Dh I hope she doesn't say it at school, he said, "Oh I'm sure they've heard everything":p

It's just a little freaky coming from my formerly speech delayed toddler.

[Piglet]

If it will make you feel better, my best friend's DH has this story from his childhood. His family moved to a new house when he was 4-5. It was a fixer-upper and his dad wasn't the handiest guy around. His dad hung curtains, fixed doors, etc. and uttered the F-word on more than one occasion. A few weeks later, his grandma comes for a visit and my friend's DH tours grandma around the house, pointing at all the neat things - "look at that F*** and that over there is a f***". It seems he started associating all the items his dad worked on with the word that he used most often for them!? It took a LONG time and a very angry grandma to get him to stop using the F-word, but it is a famous family story now!

[kijip]

A few weeks later, his grandma comes for a visit and my friend's DH tours grandma around the house, pointing at all the neat things - "look at that F*** and that over there is a f***". It seems he started associating all the items his dad worked on with the word that he used most often for them!?

My friend's brother used to go around and point to everything and say it's name. Door, chair, rug, couch, piano etc... He thought the curtains were "f-ing POS" because his mother was always cursing with the rods coming down.

[awoodm]

LOL, DS's newest word is "damn." Don't know where on earth he could have picked that up... :innocent:

I try to ignore it for the most part, as it isn't happening very often. I do let him know that it's not a nice word and it's for grown ups. He can say it when he's 35. But, at least it's in context, right?

[sarahsthreads]

I don't know how DD1 hasn't picked up that word yet, to be honest. I try to be really careful, but sometimes it just slips out!

I tend to swear in Italian more often than not (pretty much the only bit of that language I've picked up from my grandparents) and DD1 has asked what it means. I just told her she's not old enough to know yet, but when she was I'd be sure to teach her!

Sarah :)

[Radosti]

Haha... to this day, I cannot swear in Russian... it's a mental block my mother brainwashed into my head. I know the words, but they won't come out. English is apparently no problem though. So far, so good, no repeats of the word the last two days :)

[niccig]

I do not know why DS isn't using that word. I say it far too often. When he does, and it's a when and not an if, DH says he'll know who DS heard it from. DS has asked, and I said it was an adult word and only adults use it. It's worked so far, but now he is in school he'll hear it from kids and then my "only adults" excuse goes out the window...

Radosti - I hate it when DS does that when driving. I tell him to grow up and get over it as here in LA people drive with guns, and there's been road rage shootings.