Tips on the toddler bed PLEASE

[elektra]

Not having the crib sucks. Since DD has not napped for 2 days, it has not been pleasant for anyone around here. DD is just struggling with being able to settle down and stay in bed.
I am having anxiety over the whole thing. I took her back to her bed probably 15 times before giving up at nap time both yesterday and today. It freaks me out knowing that she's not contained and it's upsetting that she's not getting the rest she needs.
Last night she actually stayed in bed after DH put her down on the first try. But then I had to go in around midnight to rock her back to sleep.
She and DH are in her room right now, since she ran out twice.

I thought at 2.5 years old, we should just bite the bullet and go to the toddler bed as opposed to the crib tent. Now I am not so sure.

I'm gonna try searching old threads now because I need solutions asap!

[KpbS]

We waited until 3.5 so definitely on the later end of moving out of the crib. Can you start some new bedtime rituals? It seems like at that age they love to form new routines. I remember reading about a mom who drew a picture for her DC about bedtime routines, jammies, brush teeth, story, goodnights, etc. all to emphasize the structure of bedtime and saying "goodnight" means that is the last thing until morning (no coming out of bed!!!).

We also did a sticker/reward chart initially. Does she have a bed rail? I read here that one idea is to slip a pool noodle (trimmed down to fit) under the sheet to help prevent the child from rolling out of the bed. It might also help her feel more secure in the new bed.

Hope things improve quickly :hug:

[elektra]

Thanks for the suggestions! We do have a pool noodle in there. I think it is helping at night but for the attempted naps she has been fooling around with it and it's been ending up on the side of the mattress vs. on top.

I think we may need a new ritual with more winding down in her actual room vs. the family room (?)
With rapidly changing DS in the mix now, our routines seem to fluctuate from week to week. First he was going down after DD, now I need to work it where he goes down first.
And I did promise a reward (watching a movie) if she stayed in bed for her nap yesterday. She just couldn't do it and didn't even whine when we did other stuff besides the movie after we gave up on trying to stay in her room.

I know it's only been two days but it feels like a week.

[amandabea]

We transitioned our DD into a big-girl bed very early mainly bc my parents came for a visit (DD's room is/was our guest room) and then we were going to be traveling without access to a crib. So I bought a toddler aerobed and we started naps in that as a novelty -- like at daycare. The first few days she would get out, but she quickly learned that if she did, it would be into the crib -- she actually never got off the bed by herself after those few early times and would just call us in when she awoke. We talked about this meaning she was a big girl, so after a few weekends of naps only, we talked about sleeping in that bed at night. It was probably a month later that she completely transitioned out of the crib. Then after two months of the aerobed, she moved into the queen bed in her room. We have those snug tuck bed rails, which are great -- although you could totally make them for a lot less $ if you are the least bit crafty and can sew.

So, all that to say that maybe if you get her to think that this is her idea and part of becoming a big girl -- as opposed to a baby -- then maybe it will be a smoother transition.

[infocrazy]

DS2 is still in a crib but he will sometimes take naps in DS1's bed. He LOVES it because he thinks he is a big boy when he does. I tell him that he has five minutes to go to sleep and if he gets up at all, he goes back in the crib. He goes right to sleep. Of course this is more a novelty than a daily thing so maybe it will wear off but it works for now. Good luck.

[maestramommy]

We just finally moved Dora to a twin bed this summer because we thought we needed the crib for Laurel. She is pretty good about staying in bed, but she is also just starting to give up naps. So occasionally she'll come out after being in there for less than an hour. Sucks for me, but I know if she were tired she'd just stay put. Probably couldn't say the same for Arwyn. She'll stay in her crib for as long as needed since we aren't going to have any more babies.

[KathyN115]

We had the same problem with DD when we transitioned her to a bed. She was almost 3, and would get up during the night too, and not go back to bed. Up, down, up, down in the middle of the night - not fun! I ended up putting a gate on her door. I would give her two warnings, then the next time she came out, I closed the gate. After 2 nights, no more problem. I left the gate there (but open). Sorry, no nap advice, she gave up napping a long time ago, and it is still terrible.

[arivecchi]

Honestly, I wish we had just used the crib tent and kept DS1 in the crib longer. As you know, we are not faring too well on this front.

[Melaine]

Try a security camera. We got a cheap one at Harbor Freight Tools. It was like $30. We watched and went in immediately any time they got out or even if they were sitting up for awhile. Pretty soon they got the drift we were always watching and they stopped getting out of the beds and now they sleep fine in them. I'm happy we made the transition when we did.

[arivecchi]

I don't understand how you guys do it?! My kid screams at the top of his lungs and basically gets so worked up he has coughing fits and nearly throws up when we close the gate in his room. It was so traumatic for him. On top of that, if we let him cry he wakes up DS2 accross the way.

[maestramommy]

I don't understand how you guys do it?! My kid screams at the top of his lungs and basically gets so worked up he has coughing fits and nearly throws up when we close the gate in his room. It was so traumatic for him. On top of that, if we let him cry he wakes up DS2 accross the way.

:hug::hug: I don't know that we did anything really.

[elektra]

I don't understand how you guys do it?! My kid screams at the top of his lungs and basically gets so worked up he has coughing fits and nearly throws up when we close the gate in his room. It was so traumatic for him. On top of that, if we let him cry he wakes up DS2 accross the way.

I don't quite understand the whole "they just stay in there" thing either! Last night what seemed to work was DH waiting right outside DD's door and each time she came out he was just standing there. Eventually he offered to lay down next to her on the floor. She then layed down next to him on the floor (cute) but he was able to coax her back into the bed. He then waited until she was pretty relaxed but maybe not asleep and was able to sneak out.

But for the naps we don't always have the opportunity to stay in there with her for that long.

[arivecchi]

DH started laying down next to the toddler bed so DS1 would stay in bed. Of course, that was not ideal for DH. DS1 would fall asleep, but as soon as he would wake up during the night, he would scream until we got him. After DH got sick of laying down next to DS1, we turned the toddler bed into a full size bed, thinking maybe he would be so excited about the bed, he would stay put. We also put a gate in his room. Enter coughing attacks/almost puking & waking up the baby. He now sleeps in our bed because we all rest better that way. Sigh. If anyone has any brilliant recs, let us know. I would not mind having some evening downtime again.

[Melaine]

Mine didn't just stay in there, we definitely had to train them, which is why the video camera helped a lot. We wanted them to know that not only could they not leave the room, but they couldn't leave the bed either. They definitely cried about it but they weren't traumatized like pp so I don't know what can be done in that situation. I think it helped for once that they had each other so they didn't feel alone. I do feel like if you give in it makes it harder in the long run. (not to say I wouldn't have given in, I likely would. DH is much more firm and it makes things a lot better actually).

[KathyN115]

Oh no, there was lots of screaming here too. I just tried to calmly let her know what was going to happen, then I had to shut my bedroom door. I also don't have another DC to worry about being awakened at night with the screaming. She used to cry/scream until she vomited when younger, whenever we would try CIO, so I feel your pain with that. Nothing worse than the smell of vomit in the middle of the night, and having to bathe them because they got it ALL OVER THEMSELVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good Luck! Things are working OK for us now, but I expect that will change soon. DD has never been a great sleeper, and stopped napping at a young age. We have had most of the sleep problems imaginable, so I always feel for people who have them too. :grouphug:

[DrSally]

DS was in his crib until 3.5, when after a trip where he slept on a big bed, he didn't want to sleep in the crib anymore. Now, he's sleeping on the floor eventhough there's a mattress that we have on the floor. I think it really varies from child to child and there's always a transition period.

[elektra]

Well our nanny was able to get DD to nap in bed today. Yippee! Our nanny is very calm and I'm sure that helped. I checked out that harbor freight camera (although it is dangerous to send DH to that store!), and that could be cool. Or maybe I will just switch DS's video monitor to DD's room.
She is getting up about a half hour earlier than she would in the crib, probably because she does not want to stay down and snooze when she can run around instead. However, 30 minutes is doable.
Waiting for DH to come in with the update on tonight. Compared to screaming and barfing maybe this isn't as horrible as it could be.
Thanks ladies!

[DrSally]

Well our nanny was able to get DD to nap in bed today. Yippee! Our nanny is very calm and I'm sure that helped. I checked out that harbor freight camera (although it is dangerous to send DH to that store!), and that could be cool. Or maybe I will just switch DS's video monitor to DD's room.
She is getting up about a half hour earlier than she would in the crib, probably because she does not want to stay down and snooze when she can run around instead. However, 30 minutes is doable.
Waiting for DH to come in with the update on tonight. Compared to screaming and barfing maybe this isn't as horrible as it could be.
Thanks ladies!

Yeah! Hopefully it is/was just a transition thing.