Wedding/Bridal Shower etiquette question...

[newg]

OKay, I went to a bridal shower for a friend I use to work with before DD.....the shower was at the beginning of this month and they were suppose to get married this past Saturday..............we couldn't go to the wedding but I was going to send a gift card......literaly the day I'm getting ready to drop the card in the mail she sends me this email:

"Just wanted to keep you in the loop..."I.B." and i are waiting to get married. it is a long story but a good thing. so we will get married when the time is right, which isn't this sat"

So I responded that I hope everything is okay, and please let me know when the new date is....................I don't feel we are good enough friends for me to ask more personal details, but I don't know how to take her email at all!!

So now I'm wondering, if things don't go through will she send my bridal shower gift back to me (I spent close to $50 on her gift).....and how long do I hold onto the gift card before using it myself (target) or giving it as a gift to someone else??

[ThreeofUs]

Well, I don't know if she'll send back your gift, even though the rules of etiquette say she should. But I do think you should go ahead and use the gift card. Sounds like the wedding is off (if only for a while), don't you think?

[awoodm]

I would just use the gift card myself, I can always get use out of a Target gift card. I would be afraid I would lose it if I tried to hold on to it for too long. You can always get another one once the new wedding date is announced.

[newg]

Yeah, I'm not too worried about the gift card.............it's the nice gift I gave her at the bridal shower I'm more worried about.......................if it weren't so close to the holidays, the mass amounts of birthdays the next two months...and just the general penny pinching mode I'm in......I might not think too much of it...............but $50 bucks could go a long way in the coming months!!

[♥ms.pacman♥]

Well, I don't know if she'll send back your gift, even though the rules of etiquette say she should. But I do think you should go ahead and use the gift card. Sounds like the wedding is off (if only for a while), don't you think?

:yeahthat: i agree. i would definitely go ahead and use the Target gift card.

across the board, all etiquette rules say that if a wedding is cancelled, all gifts should be returned. however, in this case, it sounds like they are postponing it, not cancelling (?). it does seem very weird though that she announced it just like that over a short, informal email.. i personally think it's somewhat rude to just leave all the guests hanging like that w/o any explanation, especially so close to the wedding and after receiving all the shower gifts..

[TwinFoxes]

Agree with PPs, use the GC, and she should give you the gift back. But I personally wouldn't hold my breath, and you can't really ask for it back (I think that would be worse than not giving it back!)

You're nicer than me...I'd be DYING to know what happened! :)