The dreaded xmas "list"...

[dukie41181]

:duh:I was informed by my very sweet MIL that I need to have my xmas list to her by Thanksgiving. It seems silly to me to still be making a list for her...I stopped doing this for my own mother years ago! My MIL is a very very sweet woman, but even though she askes for this list, she complains about the contents of my "list" every year. I wonder why I am even trying to put something together. Every time I do she comes back asking if there is anything else I would like and then NEVER takes any suggestions I stress about trying to figure out for her.

:duh:

[Beckylove]

My whole family demands a list every year. I feel awkward making it, it seems greedy. But since they request it, I comply. It is easier to come up with if I break it into categories. My categories are: books, clothes, movies, hobby supplies, kitchen stuff, holiday decorations, gift cards. I try and think up a few things in each area. I has cut down in my mil giving me ugly jewelry every year.

[alien_host]

I'm not sure why she asks for a list and then doesn't use it. But if she asked nicely for the list, I'd put together a short, very simple list with little room for interpretations or screw-ups ;)

1-2 book titles with authors
magazine subscription?
1-2 gift card suggestions (stores or restaurants)
maybe ask for a GC for a spa treatment or tell her she can treat you to lunch one day?
1-2 household items (small appliance, towels etc).

Good luck!

[srhs]

I always have a long list, and I worry I look greedy too, but oh well. Everyone in the family is required to provide a list or be labeled difficult.
ANYWAY, I know this doesn't help much for this year, but I keep a Word doc on my computer that I open from time to time (all year, and often in the fall)to add things that I see that I'd like to have but don't want to spend the $ on.

[Twoboos]

MIL asks me for The List every year, too. I never kept a LIST - this is totally MIL and SIL though - they always want want want.

Finally, after 11 years, I started a Wish List on Amazon (you can add items from any website). If I saw something I like, I would throw it on. Now I have a list to give her without having to scrape something together in one night. (Oh, and it will be useful for DH too - he needs major hints!! :))

Very annoying that you give her a list and she doesn't get anything from it - what kind of power trip is that, sheesh.

[vonfirmath]

I much prefer folk to give me lists than expect me to read their minds about what they want. It gives me ideas even if I don't buy entirely off of it.

[dukie41181]

I guess I'm not so much complaining about the actual list, although it does make me feel a bit juvenile, but the fact that I put effort into something that is seemingly worthless in the end. I know every year I end up with "interesting" articles of clothing that look like they were meant for someone FAR older than I! I never say anything though, just graciously donate. I love my MIL, but this gets to me every year. Whats even more interesting is that she sticks like glue to my husband's, my BIL and SIL lists! No deviations! Geesh, is my list so bad?! :eek:

[karenj2]

My side of the family does lists - personally I'd rather, so that I'll get something I want... I always put on there "or, anything that you spot while shopping that just screams 'buy this for Karen!'"

DH's family never did lists, and every year we'd get either a sweater, a book or a gift card.

As for giving your MIL a list and having her not get anything on it - that's what my sister's MIL used to do to her. And not only did she get non-age appropriate clothing, she'd get it in 2x or 3x when my sister was NOT that big!! Finally my sister told her hubby to tell his mom to give Kristine gift cards or non-clothing gifts ONLY.

[WatchingThemGrow]

What about asking her which stores she'll be going to and choosing some things from there you'd like? Maybe it is the type of stores on your list? Like my mom didn't want to be bothered by going to places *I* wanted stuff from.

Oh, and we have a Google Doc with a wishlist for all 5 of us. I think last year we put a navy Odyssey on there as a joke. Guess what we drive now.

[Indianamom2]

My MIL does the same thing. She is wonderful and I love her dearly, but I often wonder why I bother with the list.

I have found that when I ask for gift cards to specific places, I tend to get them, but I almost always also get a "creative" gift. Sometimes, it turns out nice (like a video monitor for my first baby shower, even though I didn't register or ask for one!), sometimes not so much....like clothing in a not-even-close size!

Good luck and try to keep your sense of humor.