Buy Nothing Day is Friday, November 27th.

[Sillygirl]

It's been over a year since the Great Recession started. There will be lessons learned from this searing experience for decades. One lesson that has become abundantly clear is that our culture of shopping cannot continue. It poisons the environment, robs us of financial security, and doesn't make us any happier. If you are lucky enough to have food, shelter and health, that extra big-screen TV or Wii or Ipod will give you a brief buzz, a transient glow of ownership - then it's on to the next item. There's always something more to want, and you cannot buy your way to happiness.

Marketers don't want you to think like this. They whip up the crowds into frenzies so that we will spend mindlessly, sure that we are creating wonderful holiday memories for our children by buying them just the right toy. Take back control! Opt out!

Skipping Black Friday will not bring our consumer culture to a halt. It is a personal act. You may need to white-knuckle past the crowds that are going to snap up all the good bargains. But in a week or two, you won't even remember what was in those flyers. Your credit card bill will be smaller. You'll have memories of a pleasant post-Thanksgiving day spent playing touch football or baking cookies, instead of pushing past bleary-eyed Mall-wart employees at 5 AM. And you'll see that you really didn't need any of that stuff. Nuture that realization. Look mindfully at what you spend each day. Save what you don't spend, and see in a year how rich you have been all along.

[MMEand1]

I'm in - not planning on going out on Friday and we certainly don't need more "stuff" around here. Thinking about giving my DC more "experiences" and less material things (not that they already don't have tons of experiences... moving around with the military and not knowing how long we are going to be in one place has a tendency to cause us to try to do everything in each area lest we move before we have a chance to do so).

Yep, not buying anything here!

[KpbS]

Love it! Thanks for posting. :)

[JenaW]

Not really much of a black friday shopper anyways, but we are certainly not going out this year. Instead, we are thinking of meeting some friends, packing some thermoses of hot chocolate and going ice skating on an outdoor skating rink. There is also a gingerbread house exhibit at a local museum that I thought would be fun to visit. I am hoping it will be quiet(er) since other will be out shopping. Since the first Sunday of Advent starts the weekend after Thanksgiving, we will probably spend most of Sunday getting a tree and starting some Christmas decorations. We don't usually get to do this Thanksgiving weekend because we like to wait until Advent actually starts, and it usually isn't this early. (That reminds me, I need to get cracking on my Advent calendar activities....wasn't there a post about that here??)

[maestramommy]

Well, I'm in. Esp. since we never venture out of the house on Black Friday if we can help it:p The thought of all those crowds at the stores and parking lots gives me the willies.

But point well taken. I am so thankful for what I have had this last year, and what I have now, adding one more item wouldn't make me any happier.

[wellyes]

I never shop the day after Thanksgiving, I have NO interest in it. I hate crowds and being herded. Having said that, I do know a couple of people who have Black Friday as a mom-and-daughter day... they plan ahead, talk about it a long time beforehand, get up at an ungodly hour together and spend the day store-hopping. It's not how my Mom & I bond at all, but I do respect that kind of bonding - even over shopping, it's so good to spend time with family/friends.

[citymama]

I've been observing Buy Nothing Day for well over a decade - don't need to convince me! Wish I could maintain the resolve the rest of the year too...

[Carrots]

I have never done the Black Friday thing. Sleeping in is priceless.

[strollerqueen]

I never go shopping on Black Friday. All my kids have outgrown all their clothes and shoes though. So I have to spend on that. Any ideas? P.S. I have offered to Swap, maybe that is the answer.

[kransden]

Uhmm... after the people got trampled to death at Wal-Mart last year, I am not much of a Black Friday ad person anymore.

[Clarity]

I never shop on Black Friday so I guess I'm in!

[SnuggleBuggles]

It poisons the environment, robs us of financial security, and doesn't make us any happier.


I have participated in Buy Nothing day for years; I feel no need to fight for bargains. There are lots of other things we enjoy doing on that day.

I really do get what you are saying but I did pull out that bit above because honestly? I get happiness from buying gifts for other people. We do a lot of special (and not so special) things together all the time so I understand and value experiences over material goods. But, one year we bought my mom a camera for Christmas. It was a running joke that she was too irresponsible for one as all of her previous cameras had met unfortunate demises (accidental trips through the washing machines, for example). We all decided to get her a camera and she was so surprised and happy with that gift. I just admit that I got a bit of a thrill and happiness from knowing I picked something for her that brightened her day. I feel the same way when I do something like buy a gift from one of the giving trees- knowing that I could be buying the only gift the person will be getting that year makes feel better that I am making the tiniest of positive impacts- letting someone know they haven't been forgotten. A child who now has something new, something that they will be able to share with their friends isn't such a horrible use of my money, personally. Are there ways I could be using my money to help those people better? I'm sure there are. But, it's a small act and it is a material act but it isn't that bad of a thing to do. So, I'll shop for many reasons but that day I will sit out and enjoy the peace at home with my loved ones.

Beth

[bigpassport]

Normally, when a post rubs me the wrong way I simply keep my thoughts to myself. But here I go. . . Had the OP said "I am going to be more mindful of MY spending this holiday season", I certainly wouldn't have minded that. However, OP suggests that all people who shop on Black Friday are mindless, irresponsible shoppers.


They [marketers] whip up the crowds into frenzies so that we will spend mindlessly, sure that we are creating wonderful holiday memories for our children by buying them just the right toy. Take back control! Opt out!

I spend mindfully all year long. The vast majority of DS's clothes, toys and gear are second-hand, either hand-me-downs, Ebay or consignment. If I purchase a new item, I generally shop around for the best price or wait for a great sale. We don't carry a credit card balance. We simply are not irresponsible spenders.

Why then should I refrain from saving money on a few purchases planned ahead from Black Friday ads? I don't need to "opt out" to be in control.

[mommy111]

I've been observing Buy Nothing Day for well over a decade - don't need to convince me! Wish I could maintain the resolve the rest of the year too...
:hysterical:
Yup, that's me too.

[mommy111]

I have participated in Buy Nothing day for years; I feel no need to fight for bargains. There are lots of other things we enjoy doing on that day.

I really do get what you are saying but I did pull out that bit above because honestly? I get happiness from buying gifts for other people. We do a lot of special (and not so special) things together all the time so I understand and value experiences over material goods. But, one year we bought my mom a camera for Christmas. It was a running joke that she was too irresponsible for one as all of her previous cameras had met unfortunate demises (accidental trips through the washing machines, for example). We all decided to get her a camera and she was so surprised and happy with that gift. I just admit that I got a bit of a thrill and happiness from knowing I picked something for her that brightened her day. I feel the same way when I do something like buy a gift from one of the giving trees- knowing that I could be buying the only gift the person will be getting that year makes feel better that I am making the tiniest of positive impacts- letting someone know they haven't been forgotten. A child who now has something new, something that they will be able to share with their friends isn't such a horrible use of my money, personally. Are there ways I could be using my money to help those people better? I'm sure there are. But, it's a small act and it is a material act but it isn't that bad of a thing to do. So, I'll shop for many reasons but that day I will sit out and enjoy the peace at home with my loved ones.

Beth
:yeahthat: too. The best thing I ever bought was a digital photo frame for my mom. I got a great deal of pleasure out of how much she oohhed and aaahhhed over it

[wellyes]

It poisons the environment, robs us of financial security, and doesn't make us any happier.

That's just as true of the whole holiday season as it is of Black Friday, no?

I'd love to be someone who didn't get a thrill from buying things, receiving material presents or selecting the perfect gift for someone else. I recently read a book on Buddhism and it gave me a flash of what life would be like it I were able to instead delight in the natural world, in the simplest gestures.

But I have to say no this year. I'm going to go through all the regular motions of Christmas. My in-laws are dealing with terminal illness, which is naturally completely stressing out my husband, and my older relatives are all in their 90s. In a weird sense I think it would be selfish of me to go on my own non-consumer tangent this year. I feel like being "normal" will bring comfort to people. And that's important.

[pinkmomagain]

I recently read a book on Buddhism and it gave me a flash of what life would be like it I were able to instead delight in the natural world, in the simplest gestures.

Can you please share the name of the book you read?

[Georgia]

In a weird sense I think it would be selfish of me to go on my own non-consumer tangent this year. I feel like being "normal" will bring comfort to people. And that's important.

I'm sorry you're having a rough year, and I'm with you on not wanting to opt out this holiday season. Last year I would have been in complete agreement with the OP's argument, but this year it feels almost selfish. A couple things changed my mind.

One was that when the economy was clearly tanking a year ago I decided to cut back on "extra" spending for no real reason except fear and that it seemed to send the right non-consumer message. So one thing I cut out was buying coffee in the morning from this little local coffee shop. Unfortunately apparently a lot of other people made the same decision and the place went out of business a month ago and some nice folks lost their jobs. I guess I saved a few hundred dollars over the year, but for what really? I found another local coffee shop now and I'm buying coffee again but I wish I'd never stopped.

The other thing that changed my mind was seeing the stats on the amount of disposable income we have today vs. what our parents might have had. We actually spend a much smaller percentage of our income on stuff like groceries, clothes, even electronics then they did. Prices have dropped so much that it may look like we spend on this stuff like mad, but Americans spend a much higher portion of their income on housing and health care today than they do on plasma tv's. I'm completely unconvinced now that it was poor consumer spending habits that brought on this crisis.

So I hope this Black Friday goes like gangbusters. There are tons of people out there who can't spend this season and others who might have gone in debt to spend this year but are wiser this time around. I don't see the point of the rest of us opting out to prove a point when it's more likely to result in a cashier at Target losing her job than anything else. And why begrudge a family using some Black Friday deals to make the holidays feel a bit more normal than they would otherwise.

I get the point that many of us have soooo much compared to others and why do we need more stuff and what does that teach our kids, so I'd like to propose an new plan for Black Friday for those doing ok. Let's take the kids, spend what we can afford, and donate everything we buy. Or if you hate the crowds write a check to a soup kitchen or a Toys for Tots type of charity. But don't just opt out and think it's helping anything.

(Didn't expect that to turn into such a rant...)

[alien_host]

No disrespect to the OP or other PPs who believe in this but I personally don't see the point. If you don't want to shop BF, that is fine, a lot of people don't but to do it for "some greater good" doesn't make sense to me. Some of you may not shop Black Friday, that is one day out of 365. You then will shop Saturday, Sunday or another day. I can't see how not shopping on one day is going to make an impact, but that's my 2 cents.

I will shop BF, I enjoy it. Nobody (not my DH or anyone else) understands why I enjoy it. I like the thrill of the hunt. I typically only buy what is "needed" and it gives us extra money to give to charity or whatever.

I only get up at 4AM for 3 things ;) :
1) to feed a baby
2) to catch a flight to Aruba
3) Black Friday.

This year we are "adopting a family" through my DH's workplace. We have a budget of X to spend on this family in need and a list of wishes. If I can get up at 4AM and buy those kids winter coats at ON for $15 each, that would normally cost $30-40 each I can use the difference for other things they need such as underwear and boots. How is that "bad"?

ETA: Since I go so darn early, before anyone else in the house is awake, I'm generally home for breakfast.

Georgia I think you made a lot of good points, ITA with what you are saying too.

[JamiMac]

Normally, when a post rubs me the wrong way I simply keep my thoughts to myself. But here I go. . . Had the OP said "I am going to be more mindful of MY spending this holiday season", I certainly wouldn't have minded that. However, OP suggests that all people who shop on Black Friday are mindless, irresponsible shoppers.



I spend mindfully all year long. The vast majority of DS's clothes, toys and gear are second-hand, either hand-me-downs, Ebay or consignment. If I purchase a new item, I generally shop around for the best price or wait for a great sale. We don't carry a credit card balance. We simply are not irresponsible spenders.

Why then should I refrain from saving money on a few purchases planned ahead from Black Friday ads? I don't need to "opt out" to be in control.

I could not agree with you more! From what I've seen most Black Friday shoppers are pretty savvy and out to save money by going to the stores at off times. The only way the "boycotting Black Friday" would ever make sense is if you planned on buying ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for anyone throughout the holidays. Personally, I am not a black Friday shopper because I don't want to go fight the crowds, but I see nothing wrong with others doing so, especially when most people have in mind the specific things they are wanting and want to get a better deal on them. I also second what other posters have said about getting joy from buying something for someone.

[wellyes]

Can you please share the name of the book you read?

Breakfast with Buddha by Roland Merullo. It's a novel, very accessible. A happy, successful middle-aged guy who, like most of us, occasionally senses that his life is a little too empty ends up on an unlikely road trip with a monk/guru. It's not a book to covert you, and it's certainly not orthodox Buddhism -- more using Buddhist motifs to look at the big life questions. I enjoyed it.

[strollerqueen]

Yeah, it's like what I was trying to say earlier. I really, really need to buy clothes for the kids. I would love to buy them at a good sale if I could. So whether it is Black Friday (we are going to the zoo that day, our tradition), or any other day , I still need to spend that money to get it for them (unless I swap.)