Ideas on what to serve my adoption social worker?

[JustMe]

Although this may officially belong it what's cooking I need good ideas fast! I have my first meeting with the adoption worker that will write my homestudy and be my representative in the adoption process this week. I had a homestudy done years ago, but this is totally different as before I adopted with a private agency for international adoption and this is a state/foster care adoption. Anyway, that probably means nothing to most of you, but basically I feel the need to make sure I make a good impression! I asked around and, yes, people recommend I serve her a snack...okay, but what. I'd rather not do something like cookies/cake b/c dd would be bouncing off the walls, but I will consider it if I need to. I am thinking crackers, cheese, and fruit would be nice, but how to I arrange them...any other ideas? I will not have time to do anything too time consuming and the meeting is at 3:30, so it should not really be a meal.

Thanks!

[katydid1971]

I would put seedless grapes, almonds and a couple cheese (a soft cheese like brie and a cheeder) and nice crackers all out in a nice tray. If you have a nicer market in town and see what they can recomend.

[TamiRuns]

Our family was formed through the miracle of adoption, so I totally understand what you are feeling! The first time we had our meeting in the morning and I made blueberry muffins...the sw didn't even try one and I spent a long time deciding on what to make! The second time, our meeting was at lunchtime so we bought a variety of deli sandwiches from a local shop and sliced them into mini sandwiches.

For the time your sw is coming, I'd go with the cheese, crackers and fruit. Sounds good to me...

Best of luck to you. Things will be fine no matter what you serve!

[sadie427]

For our meetings, we did a Whole Foods pizza and salad when she came over lunchtime and a store-bought coffee cake when she came in the morning--for the afternoon cheese, crackers and fruit would be fine. It doesn't need to be fancy. Good luck!

[ZeeBaby]

Don't be insulted if the worker doesn't eat or think she doesn't like you. Some states have ethical requirements preventing their workers from accepting gifts from clients. Just FYI. Your menu sounds great to me and very thoughtful.

[icunurse]

LOL I remember the stress of figuring that out and wanting to be nice, but not try *too* hard. I think what you mentioned will be just fine. We always had cookies or cheese and crackers and water, tea, coffee, etc. I don't think any food was ever touched, but they usually took water. :) Good luck!!

[ha98ed14]

Don't be insulted if the worker doesn't eat or think she doesn't like you. Some states have ethical requirements preventing their workers from accepting gifts from clients. Just FYI. Your menu sounds great to me and very thoughtful.

Is the purpose of the SW to come and be a fly on the wall and watch you interact or to interview you/ convey information? How many times do they come? I would think they would know that you aren't serving a preschoolers brie in a daily basis.

[crl]

Our homestudies have been private. I've offered fruit, cheese and crackers. I've also offered muffins and fruit. I try to have coffee or tea to offer (we don't drink either) as well as water and juice.

We've done 6 homestudies/updates now (moves, international attempts gone awry, etc) and I've had only one social worker accept any food. Most have asked for water. So I wouldn't stress about what to offer much.

(For the person who asked about the purpose of the meeting, the social worker is definitely there to interact. In my experience they ask questions, go over paperwork and make sure they see the entire house.)

Good luck!
Catherine

[JustMe]

Thanks for the replies and suggestions! I'm actually a social worker myself, although I am a therapist-don't work for the state-etc, so I know about the ethics of eating...however, when I took my prep classes the trainers ended up mentioning some yummy food they ate when visiting foster/adoptive parents, so I bet she can and maybe will eat...

She will not be a fly on the wall...and will mostly be talking to us...From what I understand we should be starting the homestudy process now (which involves her basically interviewing me), but on the phone she said this would be a meet-n-greet and we would also be scheduling some follow up appts, so I am not exactly sure what it will look like....

Anyway, thanks again....I think I will try to figure out how to arrange crackers, fruit and cheese in a pretty way...which is not my strength!

[lizzywednesday]

Thanks for the replies and suggestions! I'm actually a social worker myself, although I am a therapist-don't work for the state-etc, so I know about the ethics of eating...however, when I took my prep classes the trainers ended up mentioning some yummy food they ate when visiting foster/adoptive parents, so I bet she can and maybe will eat...

She will not be a fly on the wall...and will mostly be talking to us...From what I understand we should be starting the homestudy process now (which involves her basically interviewing me), but on the phone she said this would be a meet-n-greet and we would also be scheduling some follow up appts, so I am not exactly sure what it will look like....

Anyway, thanks again....I think I will try to figure out how to arrange crackers, fruit and cheese in a pretty way...which is not my strength!

What shape is your platter? I like working with round serving platters because it makes it easy to section it off visually, but have also done pretty arrangements with cutting boards (rectangles) ... with very little skill or effort. (I don't consider myself a particularly skillful person, though I do have a few artistic tendencies.)

When arranging, put your cheese & fruit on 2/3 of the platter; don't feel like you need to put it all out at once. The cheese will stabilize everything else while the crackers will slide around a bit. If using crackers in plastic sleeves, just undo the sleeve and just kind of slide them out from the middle to the outside edge of the platter; they'll kind of naturally fan out a bit. Don't be afraid to overlap rows of crackers slightly; it'll look OK as you finish filling the plate.

Sometimes I see a photo in a magazine that helps me plot out my work and I kind of riff on that ... but that may not work for you.

[crl]

Anyway, thanks again....I think I will try to figure out how to arrange crackers, fruit and cheese in a pretty way...which is not my strength!

Grapes (green, black and red mixed together looks nice) in a pretty bowl, crackers in a spiral on a plate and cheese on a wood cutting board with a knife to cut. Or crackers in a circle on a plate and cheese cubes piled in the middle. (I know you know this, but she really won't care about your food presentation.)

Catherine

[chozen]

when our case worker came to our house for homestudy we offered her drink etc and she declined, im not sure if they are allowed to eat at clients homes.

[MmeSunny]

Oh, I remember this. . . it was not that long ago for us and we're getting ready to go back for another! Well, of all of the sw we had come through the house for fc/adoption/resource development, etc. NONE of them ever ate or drank anything. Not a thing.

I would offer and have a little something, but really, they are going to be filling out notes/paperwork while they are there and snacks are just another something to balance. I wouldn't stress out about it at all.

County workers are really just checking the basics. Do you have food in the fridge? Where are your smoke detectors and fire extinguishers? Do you have roaches/rodents? Are there feces or trash on the floor? (Yes, that really is one of the questions on the form!) No where does it say, "Rate this potential families yummy snack skills or decorating taste."

Enjoy this part of the process. I know it's hard, but your new child will be in your home soon!

[TwinFoxes]

How about a savory muffin? Like a corn muffin with mild chilis? Or a cheese muffin. Easy to eat, plus s/he could take one with her. A nice warm corn muffin on a wintry day. Mmmm. Plus it's home made without looking over the top.

Good luck to you and your new little one! :)

[Pepper]

Our SWs never ate anything, either, though they did accept coffee. For the home visit when we were in process for DS#1, I made banana bread with chocolate chips. The only one who ate it was the dog...he snuck up onto the coffee table and stole a piece when we walked the SW to the door! Fortunately dear doggie was OK; I still remember the panicked phone call I made to the vet. They asked me how much chocolate he ingested and I was trying to count the number of choc chips in each slice of bread :tongue5:

[JustMe]

Thanks everyone! I think I will keep it really simple...maybe go to TJs and see if they have something simple and ready-made, so that she doesnt have to feel weird if she can't/doesn't want any. I know that this is typical of social workers but as I said I got a different impression during the training classes I just took (when the trainer who is also a social worker mentioned what a great cook one of her adoptive parents was)...but I will feel things out in this initial visit and go from there with the next visit.

I never fail to be amazed and appreciate the thoughtfulness of this group!

[sste]

OK, I am a freak and a teacher's pet from way back! But, I would consider doing a nice TJ's spread as detailed above AND a dish or snack from the country you wish to adopt from. Something pre-prepared at TJs or something very easy. Your social worker probably won't like it or eat it. But, if I was that social worker I would probably give the person credit for WANTING so much to make a favorable impression.