When will DS calm down?

[HIU8]

DS just turned 5. For awhile he has been in this really weird stage. He has a total made up language. He puts words he thinks are funny at the end of people's names. He cannot/willnot talk without tacking on some made up word onto everything (and it usually is a word to sound funny or nasty). He shows us his chewed food and makes up (what we feel are nasty) jokes. He is also now into teasing his sister relentlessly. Please please tell me this is a stage and not his wonderful emerging personality.

I feel like my sweat boy has been taken over by aliens.

[deannanb]

:waving4:
aliens have taken over here too!
I don't worry about it - just creativity and exploring the world in a way we aren't used to.

[bubbaray]

OMG, just when I posted last week sometime in another thread about how my DD#1 got so much better once she started Kindy. OMG, this past week has been INSANE here. We think it might have something to do with DD#2 being really sick and getting a lot of attention just b/c she's been so sick.

DD#1 basically spent from 5pm to bed in time out. It was horrible. She hates me, wants me to die, wants me to go to jail.

And, yeah, I swear to God, if I hear her use the word "poo" in every sentence this week, I might scream.

The talking back is what I'd expect from a teen. I just can't believe the attitude.

Sigh. I'm so stressed -- worried about DD#2 (who still isn't better), up to my eyeballs in gators at work, worried about DH (who is not 100% since the summer breakdown and just can not handle stress). He is freaking about the ILs coming for Christmas b/c of DD#1's behavior -- the ILs think our girls are horrible monsters and he's afraid their behavior will prove the ILs right.

I have no idea how to handle it. Other people's children don't seem to be like this. DD#1 just brought home a freakin' GLOWING report card from Kindy. I swear, I just do.not.know.what.to.do.

[sarahsthreads]

We're in a really weird stage too. I think (hope?) it's a combination of the normal ...what is it called, disequilibrium or some such? ... that occurs around their birthday and the whole holiday thing. I have to admit I was enjoying my newly turned 5 year old until we went to the mall Friday afternoon to go see Santa.

She seriously has been a crazed lunatic since then. I mean, she literally hopped off of Santa's lap, walked out of the little Santa's workshop area, and then *took off* into the mall. DH had to chase her down and carry her back kicking and screaming (to the point that I was afraid mall security was going to come and arrest him for kidnapping a child) and then she proceeded to have an on-the-floor tantrum in the mall...right in front of Santa and all the families waiting to see him. Way to show Santa how good you've been all year, DD1! (It seriously would have been hilarious had I not wanted to melt through the floor out of embarrassment...looking back it is pretty darn funny.)

She has been in time outs and sent to her room and had privileges and toys taken away more times in the past 48 hours than in the last entire two months put together. I'm actually looking forward to the bus coming to get her tomorrow so much I feel a little guilty. I'm hoping that the time away from each other will "reset" everything a bit. (Mind you, I worked - as usual - for most of Saturday, so it's not like we've been in each others' hair all weekend.) If I hear the phrase "but Mommy, I'm so, so sorry!" one more time it will be too soon, because each time is followed by an immediate repeat of the behavior she was "so, so sorry" about 10 seconds ago.

In fact, I had to put her in time out this morning. In church. In the *cry room* for heaven's sake! I mean, kids are expected to not be perfect angels in the cry room, and I don't hold my kids to any higher standard than anyone else in there, but she was a holy terror. My 16 month old was behaving better! I felt like I should apologize to everyone else there. (Well, maybe not so much the older couple who came in late and left early and glared at us the whole time. Hello? It's the "cry room", not the "come in late and leave early room".)

So, yeah, I feel all of your pain, and I'm hoping someone on this thread will chime in with some good advice, or I'm going to go on a looooong vacation all by myself until after the holidays are over!

Sarah :)

[bubbaray]

Sarah, you reminded me. Yes, church today was SOOOO interesting. DD#1 was DANCING. TG we were in the back with all the teens, they just thought it was funny. I.did.not.

What is this disequilibrium thing?

[MichelleRC]

I have likened my 5 year old son to a hormonal teenage girl. He has been a freaking lunatic for the past few months. He does not listen, talks back, has screaming tantrums where he throws stuff, and is just generally not so much fun to be around. But then 5 minutes later he is hugging me and telling me he loves me. Sigh. At least he is cute.

[JBaxter]

It takes a while ... sorry... We have the attack of toilet references and the term cheese head is somehow hillarious.
DS1 went through the random meaningless knock knock jokes, DS2 did toilet humor now ds3 is combo of toilet humor and cheese references. Ive found kindergarten and 1st grade are the worst

[hillview]

What is this disequilibrium thing?

It is cited in the "Your 5-year old" by Ames series (most of the ages mentions it). Basically you have a normal kid for 6 months and they a psycho for 6 months as kids move in and out of equilibrium. I am over simplifying it (and I don't think the doc uses the term psycho;)). I believe it has to do with learning new things/mastering them etc. but I am in a hotel away from my book so not 100% sure.
/hillary

[purpleeyes]

It takes a while ... sorry... We have the attack of toilet references and the term cheese head is somehow hillarious.
\

Yeah, we were doing really well once he turned 5, until about now. Recently anything having to do with the "butt" is absolutely hysterical. :duh:

I'm ignoring the butt stuff and cracking down on the annoying immature behavior when I know he can do better.

Once a few months go by, I bet we'll all be finding something else to worry/complain about!! :D

[KpbS]

Good to know it's not just the boys :) The strange humor is what is going on here--you know, "Mr. Stinkypants/face/head" is just the funniest thing ever...

[marie]

I'm ignoring the butt stuff and cracking down. . .




:hysterical:

[ThreeofUs]

I vote for aliens. They stole my son, too. I think it's just the stages they go through at this age.

Exasperating, funny, weird, gross. Yep. Aliens.

Hugs to you!

[sste]

Cohen should hire me as his pr person I have rec'd this book so often (following Brittone2 turning me onto it) - - Playful Parenting. Of your list, I would personally lean toward letting everything go, goofing off, turning it into a game - - except for ignoring the food chewing and addressing jokes that are mean to other people. For bathroom humor, I would consider turning it into something that is still a little nasty but not as far as your DS wants to go - - in other words, give him a substitute. So, maybe "poopyhead" is OK with you but you don't want him to get much grosser than that - - then make up a poopyhead song you can sing together and if he gets nastier make it a game to get him back into acceptable nasty territory. I actually think this is a major skill that DC learn at this age -- how to be a little bit rude/nasty/funny without going into totally socially unacceptable territory - - perhaps your DS being fixated on this kind of humor is really about him trying to learn that skill.

Of course, given that I have a 2-year old and no actual experience you may want to rely more on other posters!!

[brittone2]

FWIW, 5 has been challenging around here. Lots of emotional turmoil, etc. Lots of disequilibrium ;)

DS will be turning 6 in February and in the past month or so things have been sooooooooo much better. I feel like I'm finally getting a sneak peek at Ames and Ilig's supposed "sunny and serene" 5 year old LOL. (fwiw, I've liked looking through their books to see what is age appropriate, etc. in the past, but the Sunny and Serene 5 year old was NOT present in our house until the past month).

I'm sure in a few weeks I'll be posting to say that 6 is even more challenging than 5 though LOL.

[MMEand1]

I have found 6/7 to be quite a challenge! My DS is acting CRAZY!! Talking back, pitching fits about how we "never let him do anything", and how I (or my DH) is not the boss of him and that we need to go to jail. He finds ways to aggravate my DD (almost 5) and will say and do things to her just to make her cry ("I'm wearing your princess crown because I am the queen", "I've got your pony, haha") AGH!! I gave him a duffle bag the other day and told him to pack up that things he wanted to bring with him to military academy. He broke down and started crying about how we are a family and families are supposed to live together (that broke my heart) and "please don't make me go". I sent him to bed at 6:30...

I don't know what to do either. I really am tired of it. I told him that if he could not straighten up that I would start taking away his activities. He did not believe me, so I did not sign him up for swim lessons for the last session of the year. Tuesday afternoon he went to get ready for swimming and I told him that he was not going. He could not believe it. When I told him that if he doesn't improve I would take ballet away too, things started getting better. He has not been so crazy this past week, but I have a fear that he is just looking at different tactics!