Talk to me about behavior charts.

[LarsMal]

What has worked/not worked? How do you do it- stickers, coins? Do you give and take away or just give? How do you handle rewards?

I really need to start something for DS and DD and I'm just not sure how to go about it.


TIA!

[calv]

don't use one but M&D has a chores/behaviour one and it's super cute! $15 I believe at AC Moore

[elliput]

I just got the M&D one for DD yesterday, so I can't say how well it is working for us, but my first impressions of the tool are good. I was about to post asking for suggestions on where to hang it. :)

[Globetrotter]

I have used those from time to time but keep slipping!

The key is consistency, which is a hard one for me, but when DD was little they were a lifesaver for the morning routine (and the rest of the day, for that matter!). Instead of yelling, I would just have her check off items on the list. She could add up points and spend them on small things or save up... up to her.

I do reward charts with DD for another issue and find they are great motivators when used consistently (instead of constantly badgering her to do stuff).

[newbiemom]

I took a regular piece of paper, and everytime my oldest did what he was supposed to, he got to put a stamp on it. When we had I think it was 20 stamps, then we went out and got a little treat.

Don't take away if they misbehave, because then they see their hardwork come to nothing. I would just say "Well, if you had done this, you could have gotten another stamp, but since you chose to do that, you don't get one." You could point out how much closer they could have been to getting their reward.

We put the paper on the fridge, so it was easily accessible and he was frequently reminded of it.

As for the reward, make it something important enough and big enough for your child to work for. Something that matches what you're working on. For us, it was a small toy. But he wouldn't have been as willing if I just offered say, a cookie. On the other hand, something like a Thomas piece (like the roundhouse) would have been way too much, YKWIM?

[MamaKath]

The key is consistency, which is a hard one for me, but when DD was little they were a lifesaver for the morning routine (and the rest of the day, for that matter!). Instead of yelling, I would just have her check off items on the list. She could add up points and spend them on small things or save up... up to her.

I do reward charts with DD for another issue and find they are great motivators when used consistently (instead of constantly badgering her to do stuff).
ITA with the consistency thing. Here are some good charts that you can print to make it more enticing. http://www.freeprintablebehaviorcharts.com/
How old are your kids?

Behavior charts can be really good for some kids. Some kids need really little time chunks (20 minute chunks, just 1 activity at a time, just the morning, etc.) and then really small goals to meet (like 5 stickers to get a price, etc). Some kids can handle just having a piece of paper that gets stamps or stickers instead of a chart, some need the more organized visual of a chart. Whatever you choose to do, be consistent, be clear on your expectation (ie- We are going to read a book together. I want you to sit with me while we look together at the pictures. You can not run around the playroom during this time. If you sit with me for the story, you will get a sticker on your chart!), praise a job well done, and restate expectations as the situations change.

Having said all that, they don't work for everyone!!! Hope you find some success in them.

[MamaKath]

Here is an interesting article regarding making behavior charts work.
http://specialchildren.about.com/od/behaviorissues/ht/behaviorchart.htm

[bubbaray]

We have the M&D chore one and its a bust. You need to hang it somewhere very secure (like on a stud) b/c its heavy.

What works best for us is to have DH and the girls pick a calendar (usually princess or something) to print from the internet (I have no idea where he gets them from), then they get to pick what stickers they use.

I have to say, the biggest problem with sticker charts is mommy & daddy. I tend to forget. LOL

[hellbennt]

if you want to go whole hog, go for accountable kids...
search for a coupon code, of course, lol.
we have this and again, it's about consistancy. we haven't been consistant, but it DID get us started...

[maestramommy]

Our very first chart was just the calendar. Dh had been teaching Dora to "mark the day." When we were potty training, she drew in a smiley face on every day that she didn't poop during nap. When she woke up clean for 2 weeks she got a "special present."

Our next chart was a printout I made from something online. We used freebie stickers. For that I just told her she needed to fill all the squares, but it was basically 2 weeks worth.

[DrSally]

Only give, don't take away, as the purpose is positive reinforcement. One trick is to start out "easy", so they can experience an early success (2 stars for a reward), and then up the ante as you go along (3, 4, 5 stars, etc.). I also put the chart in an easy to see place, either on the kitchen table or on the bathroom counter, so it would be on DS's mind and he could see how many stars he needed for a prize.