Crib tent or full bed?

[elektra]

We converted DD's crib to a toddler bed about 2 months ago now, after she began to climb out. We have been sleep deprived ever since. Our good sleeper has now turned into an over-tired little girl who fights naps during the day, fights bedtimes, and comes into our room 1-3 times per night now, often needing MUCH consoling to settle back down.
I have tried a sticker chart, the teach-me-time alarm clock, rocking her to sleep, having DH lay down next to her, having her come in our bed, returning her to her bed several times,... and a few other things. But we don't seem to be making progress. And to me, Progress = her sleeping through the night with a limited getting-to-bed routine, in addition to DH, DS and myself also sleeping better, preferably TTN as well. So now I want to try either putting the crib back together and putting a crib tent on it, or converting her toddler bed to a full bed so we can lay down next to her if needed.
I am really resistant to putting a lock on her door and locking her in there. It just seems so scary and cruel to me. Worse that CIO in the crib or something. Even the Weissbluth book suggests only using that as a last resort. But would that really be scarier than the crib tent? Are we just past the crib though at this point (DD will be 3 on March)?
And then I am thinking of just converting the bed so we can at least lay down with her on something softer than the rug on the hardwood floor. However, she has never really slept well in our bed. She doesn't just cuddle right up. She fights for the pillow and has a hard time getting comfortable. So I'm not sure if she my idea of us snuggling together at bed time is realistic either.
The Weissbluth book says that you should just return the child to their bed without giving her any attention and then just walk out, even if you have to do it 100 times in one night. I just don't see how this would work though because A) DD would not physically let me leave the room, she clings on to me when she doesn't want me to leave. B) this is very likely to wake DS up. Maybe we need to just go through this exercise (of the returning to bed) if it really works though, and hope DS's schedule doesn't get too screwed up in the process.

When do they start just going to sleep in their bed??!!?@?@?@@#$%@#$%@$

SO what next? crib tent or full bed?

[arivecchi]

As someone struggling with this very issue, I say put the crib back together and do the crib tent. OW, you will have a new resident on your bed like we do. The problem will be that she's been out of the crib for a while now, so she will probably put up quite a fight. Why did no one warn us of this awful transition? :hopmad:

[AnnieW625]

I voted for convert to full bed. We moved DD from her crib to her twin bed (crib didn't have an option for a toddler bed) at just over 2 yrs. old. At first it was a hard balance, but DD eventually started sleeping in her bed just fine. We never co slept, but DH or myself would lay with DD in her bed if she got up at night. I was really hesitent to do this at first though. Books before bed always help and I think it also helps with a twin or full size bed so you are comfortable in bed too.

I also still have those stickers I'll try and get them in the mail tomorrow!

[Fairy]

Oooyy this is a toughie. I ... I dunno. I voted crib tent. I do not think it's cruel (I vote 100% against a lock on the door no matter what, I just wouldn't be able to get past the fear of soemthing going wrong in there), and we were almost at the point of going the crib tent route when it all worked itself out. However, there may be a win in converting to a full bed. Maybe with a big girl bed, she'll get a sense of pride that will keep her in there. Ultiamtely, however, she's got as much freedom with that as she does now with the toddler bed. So, I think you may be better off with the crib tent.

FWIW, my DS gave up naps at home by age 3. It killed me. But it's not that, it's the getting up during hte night that is more problematic, IMO. So, for that alone, I vote crib tent.

[mommylamb]

I voted full bed, but... I'm totally talking out my backside because I don't know. DS is 2.5 now and he's still in a crib and I may just keep him in it until he turns 20. But, I think it is probably awfully hard to move backwards after the toddler bed.

We've been having sleeping issues lately too. DS has been a great sleeper for the most part. He goes right down without a fuss and until the last few weeks would sleep through the night (though he has been known to be a very very early waker). but lately he has been deciding to wake up in the middle of the night and will cry unless I bring him to our bed... I'm just not into the co-sleeping thing and we only have a queen size bed, so it is really squished with the three of us and at least 1 of our 2 cats.

[arivecchi]

We converted DS's 1 toddler bed to a full size bed and that did not help at all. He wanted us to sleep with him the entire night in the full size bed with him which was very uncomfortable for me and DH. It did not change anything for us so now he sleeps in our full size bed. At least we all have room. I have no idea how we will ever evict him from our bed. He loves it.

[wimama]

We had a very tough time getting DS to stay in bed and sleep.

When we took his crib down we initially put his mattress on the floor. He was really good about going right to sleep himself when he was still sleeping in his crib, as soon as we took it down, he wanted us to lay down with him until he fell asleep So, we did we laid on the floor next to him. Then we gradually over several weeks (months) started sitting in the hallway while he fell asleep gradually trying to cut down the amount of time we would spend in the hallway. We used to joke that we didn't really cosleep until he was 2 years old. LOL.

We both caved and gave into staying with him for a while at bedtime, we would take turns. Both DH and I work full time, so we didn't mind a little extra time with him. He did seem to need us there with him for a while. I think it would have been easier for him to transition to a converted toddler bed.

We did put a extra tall suspension gate in the doorway of his room to keep him inside. His room was literally less than a foot from the top of the stairs. It was a necessary to keep him safe, but he could see us and talk to us easily through the gate. I couldn't bear not seeing him through a closed door and didn't want him to feel locked away.

[bluestar2]

I voted converting to full bed

[Fairy]

And that's the probloem. Once they find the comfort of your bed with you, evicting them is an uphill battle that will make you insane and cause alot of grief. Then you get to the point when you're just so exhausted that you just say, whatever, just let me SLEEP! Now, if you don't mind family bed or co-sleeping, then you're golden. But if you don't, then from his behavior so far, it's sounding to me like you want a crib tent at this point.

[JBaxter]

Can you baby gate her bedroom door or put a knob cover on it? Ive done both with my crew. Yes sometimes they slept on the floor but they stayed in their room. "I" dont like crib tents but thats me.

[Fairy]

Can you baby gate her bedroom door or put a knob cover on it? Ive done both with my crew. Yes sometimes they slept on the floor but they stayed in their room. "I" dont like crib tents but thats me.

Totally forgot about knob covers. Those are little miracles. Worth a try.

[egoldber]

because I know if DD was in the crib w/ tent, she would have woken up, realized she was "trapped" when she tried to climb out and become hysterical

This is what I always think of when I think of crib tents. I'm not normally clautrophobic, but the idea of them makes me feel very closed in.

[bluestar2]

never mind...

[okinawama]

I have a 9mo old, so I'm clueless. I had a question though ( I have not done ANY research, so I have no idea about crib tents...), isn't a crib tent like locking the door as far as safety goes? If something were to go wrong, they couldn't escape either?

[khalloc]

I moved my DD to a full-sized bed when she was 2, literally, like a week after her birthday. The first few days we still had the crib set up. She would keep changing her mind about where she wanted to sleep. Then we took the crib down so she didnt have a choice.

I remember he being fine for a couple of months. But at that point she wouldnt get out of bed by herself. She would stay in bed until we came to get her in the morning. Then she figured out that she could get in and out on her own, and after that it was awful for awhile. I think I blocked it out a bit. Once asleep she was good though. She had always been a good sleeper. We ALWAYS bring her back to her room when she gets up at night. Once in a while we give in and let her sleep with us if she gets up at 4am or after, but everytime I do that I wish I hadn't, so we TRY real hard not to give in. I did use doorknob covers for a bit, but she HATES that. But the threat of using them is usually enough to keep her in her room. She is 4 now.

I now have a 20 month old son and I can say I will not be moving him to a big boy bed until he is at least 3.

I would definitely not plan on laying in bed next to her (going for a full-sized bed) because that is a bad habit to start too (if you dont want to continue it). Bringing them back to their room does really work. You just have to repeat it and repeat it and repeat it...until you want to pull your hair out.

[kozachka]

We put DS bed in our bedroom. And he also spent quite a bit of time getting asleep in our bed, but eventually we weaned him off sleeping with us but getting him asleep was a struggle for years. Once he was asleep it would have taken a bomb explosion to wake him up. Occasionally, he'd get up for water, which we left on his bedside table. He is currently sleeping in his own room, and has no issues with sleep.

I wish we went through a difficult stage of getting him to soothe himself to sleep but our living circumstances were quite cramped at the time, and I really needed sleep.

[mom2binsd]

We put a crib tent on DS's crib at about age 2, as there was no way he was ready for anything else, it's been a godsend. He's now 3 1/2 and can unzip the tent if he really wants to, but he loves his crib and the tent. We figure we'll get him a full bed in March for his 4th birthday, but part of me doesn't want to mess with the 12 hour nights!

[elektra]

Well after last night where DH read her stories and slept on her floor til 9:45 or so and then tonight where I just left her after reading mulitple stories, fixing blankets every which way, and then with DH finally coming in for relief, I just really do not know what to do.
The crib tents are $100 and I really don't want to spend that. But a new mattress will of course be alot of money too. Maybe I just need to nut up and get the tent. I mean it could last another 6 months+, right? BUt then are we just putting off the inevitable for 6 months? Ugh. This is absolutely no fun.

[kozachka]

Upon advice from this board we got our twin size mattress from Costco for $150 plus tax. There were also full size ones available, in case you want to go this route. And we will be using it hopefully for years to come. It is a very good mattress.

Have you checked Craiglist for crib tents? I doubt they get too much use, so I would not hesitate to buy a used one. Or maybe some of your friends have one that they no longer use? Hope things will get better, and lots of hugs.

[citymama]

And that's the probloem. Once they find the comfort of your bed with you, evicting them is an uphill battle that will make you insane and cause alot of grief. Then you get to the point when you're just so exhausted that you just say, whatever, just let me SLEEP! Now, if you don't mind family bed or co-sleeping, then you're golden. But if you don't, then from his behavior so far, it's sounding to me like you want a crib tent at this point.

Oh dear, this is us. Taking off the crib sides meant DD in our bed. At first it was 3 am or 4 am. Now it's 11 pm - before we're even in bed. Which means NO time for us at all. We love having DD snuggle up for part of the night, but 11 pm to 7 am is a bit much. I try and put her back to bed in her room, but she wakes up literally every half hour until we are in bed and she can just crawl in. She is hysterical if we try and return her to her room at that point and we are exhausted and just plain weak.

But as my belly grows and we gear up for DC2, we know she has to be in her room again. I just don't know how or when this is going to happen. But it really needs to.

Sorry for the digression, elektra. I say go with the crib tent if you can!

[DietCokeLover]

I voted crib tent because a little while back I asked on here about converting our cribs to toddler beds and the advice I got on here was to keep them in the cribs. (We've had crib tents for over a year now). Everyone said that naps got dropped and sleeping changed when they went to a bed, and I was not ready for that.

FWIW, DD turned 3 last week and we'll be staying in our crib tents for a while. I like that she naps.

[Fairy]

I voted crib tent because a little while back I asked on here about converting our cribs to toddler beds and the advice I got on here was to keep them in the cribs. (We've had crib tents for over a year now). Everyone said that naps got dropped and sleeping changed when they went to a bed, and I was not ready for that.

FWIW, DD turned 3 last week and we'll be staying in our crib tents for a while. I like that she naps.

I've been thinking about this some more, and I agree with the fact that nap is very likely to be a casualty to moving away from a crib with what you're already describing. I know my child needs no fewer than 10 hours a day to be my normal little dude. When we went to a bed, he kept nap for a while, but eventually it was gone, and I know it would have remained had we kept him in a crib. so, I had to find creative ways to get him to sleep earlier for the night. So, keep this in mind for yourself.

[elektra]

I've been thinking about this some more, and I agree with the fact that nap is very likely to be a casualty to moving away from a crib with what you're already describing.
ITA. Naps are either non-existent, or are from 2:30 - 4 which then pushes bedtime back to 9:30 ish. But even after DD wakes up several times a night she is still up early in the morning. And then if she doesn't nap, she pretty much cries from 4pm to 7pm and then crashes, only to wake up hysterical several more times throughout the night.
DH and I have been going back and forth on the tent vs. full bed, going over pros and cons. His take (based only on instinct- they guy has yet to pick up any kind of baby or sleep book) is that getting the tent is only putting off the inevitable switch to the bed. My thinking is that even so, maybe DD will be more ready in 6 months, plus we can use the tent for DS eventually.
Last night DH went in to her room twice (she seems to settle down easier if he goes in before she is fully roused and running into our room). I went in twice, back to back, and then finally just brought her in bed with us at 3:30. She then proceeded to first steal my pillow, then she ended up sleeping lengthwise at the top of my pillow, wedged up against the back wall, so my head got pushed down. Her feet are then in DH's face. It's basically a comedy routine that is nowhere near funny for us in the bed!

[Joolsplus2]

Make sure you can FIND a Crib Tent... the ones at BRU were pulled from the shelves for some reason, not sure if they were recalled or what? I've had a lot of very disappointed parents looking for them :(

[Fairy]

...then finally just brought her in bed with us at 3:30. She then proceeded to first steal my pillow, then she ended up sleeping lengthwise at the top of my pillow, wedged up against the back wall, so my head got pushed down. Her feet are then in DH's face. It's basically a comedy routine that is nowhere near funny for us in the bed!

Are you sure you're not us? I thought we were the only ones. My god,this is totally us you are describing. DS is all over the bed everywhere but in his designated area, we are in different zip codes on teh very edge of the bed with DS's feet and head all over the place. He's in his bed more than in ours, but there is still some work to be done here. I am not alone! Yay!! Uh ... sorry.

[Melaine]

We used a camera and kept putting them back in their beds everytime we saw them get up. It took quite a bit of watching and waiting and consistency but they went back to being good sleepers. That being said, naptime did go away soon after the transition. I tend to say find a solution to move past this issue rather than digressing by going back to the crib, but I totally understand that it's a hard choice and the crib tent might be preferable.