WTD 7 yo DS Pulling Out His Hair!!

[StantonHyde]

So 7 yo DS is sort of an anxious kid. We have had him evaluated by an OT for sensory issues and muscle strength. He does need to increase his hand strength and he has some mild anxiety component on the sensory assessment. He had been "picking" at his fingers when he was anxious or concentrating or zoning out in class. I was ok with that because we all do something like that--as long as it isn't destructive or disruptive. We have an eval scheduled in the next 3 weeks for learning disability (he probably has some dyslexia going on and maybe some ADD)--it will be part of a full neuropsych type eval.

In the last 2-3 weeks, he started running his fingers through the top of his hair and pulling at the tangles that got created. He would get several strands of hair out at a time and he complained that his hair was getting snarled. So I took him and got his hair cut pretty short--figuring that would fix it. He had a small bald area from pulling his hair, but I figured we would be ok. In the past 4 days he has rubbed that bald area into a larger bald patch that is very noticeable. I am very concerned and had decided to call the awesome child psychologist I know to schedule an appointment/consult.

This morning, the school secretary called because the teacher was concerned and wanted to know what she could do to get him to stop. DH answered the phone (I wasn't home) and said we were aware of this and would talk to the teacher. I just called the psychologist today and am waiting for a return call.

Is there anything I can do for DS to help him with this in the mean time? I am so sad and depressed that he is doing this as a coping mechanism. I just don't know what to do...

[sste]

I think this is trichotillimania (sp??) - - I believe its related to OCD, in that broad family. Or it could be just a one-off short-term stress reaction. I think you are doing absolutely the right thing getting this addressed with a child psych expert.

I don't know alot about this but I and DH are terrible hair players/twirlers. In the short term, maybe you can give your DS a competing behavior? Maybe make a sensory replica of hair with many strings of yarn or cloth cut into ragged strips -- tell him when he feels the urge to yank his hair instead to pull on the cloth/yarn.

[egoldber]

Ugh, I'm sorry. :(

Older DD's therapist recommended a book to us that I have found very helpful.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_3_7?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=freeing+your+child+from+anxiety&sprefix=freeing

It addresses the issue of trich and gives tools and techniques for dealing with it. I did not read this chapter, just skimmed it briefly because we are not dealing with this issue, but the rest of the suggestions in the book have been very helpful.

[jse107]

Yes, this is trichtillomania. It is related to OCD and anxiety. I agree with the above suggestions. Perhaps try to utilize another "fidget" item (squeeze ball, straw, koosh ball, etc).

I hope your appt. with the child psych goes well!

[713abc]

I have what I'd consider a very mild case of "trich". Actually, just last night DH and I talked about it - me trying to convince him it truly is considered a "condition" and not just a bad habit. (He says everyday to me, "stop playing with your hair!").

Mine started when I was pretty young. It was worse when I was young but never horrible (a small bald patch or two developed) but got better over time.

For what it's worth, I have no "OCD" tendencies at all; when I was younger I did have some anxiety (was a bit of a hypochondriac) but I've grown out of that too. While aware of it, my parents never really paid much attention to my issue or seemed to worry about it. I have an identical twin sister who does not have it.

Robin

[ThreeofUs]

Nothing to add - pp's are right and I really like Jen's suggestion. But sending good wishes for a great meeting with the psychologist.

[Globetrotter]

I sent you a PM.

[pinkmomagain]

So sorry to hear it. Two of my three daughters have trich. One pulls from her head and one pulls from her eyebrows. :-( Many psychologists don't know too much about it or how to treat it. I would ask ahead of time if the therapist you/dc see has experience with trich.

Here is a really great support organization: http://trich.org/

If you have any questions at all, feel free to PM me about it.

[edurnemk]

I don't have any advice to add, but DH had this when he was a kid and it went on for several years, although it wasn't serious all the time. MIL took him to the dermatologist when she noticed the bald spots on his scalp (I guess back then child psychologists and such were not so common, plus the IL's are anti-psychologists... that's a whole other thread).

Anyway, the dermatologist told MIL he was pulling it out himself and it was anxiety and that she was probably pressuring him too much, I don't know if this was a correct assesment, but if I had to live with MIL everyday I'd be pulling my hair out, too, :hysterical: They didn't do much about it, but DH got involved in a lot of sports activities and that may have been an outlet for his stress, after a while he stopped pulliing it out. Oh, and apparently the worst episodes happende when they moved to a new house, and SIL was born.

Now DH is freaking out because DS loves playing with my hair, it soothes him, but when I'm not within his reach he'll fidget with his own hair, not pulling it though. DH is afraid DS will start pulling it out like he did.

[StantonHyde]

Wow. I did not know how common this is. Thank you all for the link. I was struck that skin picking and hair pulling stem from the same issues. I figured CBT would be needed and some sort of substitute. I was thinking of sending him to school tomorrow with Playdoh or a squeeze ball. Maybe the yarn thing would be a good idea.

Gotta count my blessings. This is a recognized issue and there is good research on effective treatment. It can be treated/grown out of. And we have access to some great mental health professionals. (I work in a University-based psych hospital that treats children so its fairly easy for me to find a good provider)

sigh. This is hard on moms.... Thanks for your words of encouragement! :love5:

[pinkmomagain]

Rebecca, it sounds like you have great resources close by. I have tried fidget toys and for my girls it helps minimally. One dd used silly putty at school. She also finds that chewing gum helps. Many say that avoiding sugar and caffiene, and excercise helps. My girls are on medication right now that seems to help. There are also some supplements that help some people too. There are also two other websites you might want to check out http://trichworld.ning.com/ (this one is mostly adult trichsters but as a parent I find it really insightful to read their postings) and there is also a yahoo group for parents of trichsters that is good too. HTH!

eta: bandaids on fingers, cotton gloves, and hats are also helpful blocking tools to try!

[Melaine]

No real experience but I did have some concerns with DD2 playing with her hair at night. It seemed she was only pulling out already loose hair and it has gotten less frequent.

All that to say, I read that olive oil on the hair makes it slick and more difficult to pull it out.

[DrSally]

Gotta count my blessings. This is a recognized issue and there is good research on effective treatment. It can be treated/grown out of. And we have access to some great mental health professionals. (I work in a University-based psych hospital that treats children so its fairly easy for me to find a good provider)

sigh. This is hard on moms.... Thanks for your words of encouragement! :love5:

I'm really glad you have excellent resources at your disposal. You're right, it's a recognized issue and there good treatments. I'm glad you're getting on top of it now before it becomes a self-reinforcing behavior (relieves anxiety, so continue to do it, etc.). :hug: I know it's so hard for us to have our kids go through difficulties.

[StantonHyde]

Thanks again to everyone. We have an appointment with the psychologist on Tuesday. I got the Freeing YOur Child from Anxiety Book, DH went with DS to pick out a punch of squishies etc. The teacher is ok with him having playdoh or silly putty etc. Now I just get to talk to the principal about having him wear a hat. And we talked to DS about being detectives and figuring this out and he seemed ok with that. whew!! Now to go through the wretched process of behavior change. I wish things with kids could be "fixed" but there is always something!!!!