3-star Day Care....why did someone else get my milk??

[czekit7]

Seriously, I'm paying decent money to a 3-star daycare; walked into daycare on Friday to have one of the "teeny-bopper" teachers (not DS regular Mon to Thur teachers) tell me that they had heated up a bottle of breastmilk for our ride home (we live a bit out of town, and if he wakes during that ride home, he SCREAMS!). Well, I go to the warmer to get his bottle, labeled with HIS name on it with HIS breastmilk, and low-and-behold, the bottle is MISSING (OK, first it's an expensive Avent bottle...I'm so petty...but that freaking bottle was $9.00). ANYWHOOOOO....so, she says (with a terrified look on her face), "oh no, someone else must have gotten it because we just pulled it out 20 minutes ago to put it in the warmer". So, Saturday, after a 3 hr trip, he has to liquidy GREEN poops (normally bright mustard yellow with seeds...you know, normal breastmilk poo), that smells like TUNA!! WTHeck!!!! Now, my DS does get Similac supplements on a daily basis, but it still come out yellow, not green/brown and smelling like TUNA!! I said something to his regular teachers this morning, but I just keep thinking about it...I'm slightly miffed...and THEN he goes 40hrs without pooping (which my DS will normally have two-three poopy diapers a day), which of course freaked me out...he's only 11 weeks old. Do I keep him in this 3-star (highest rank for DHS) daycare, or try to get back into the smaller daycare that I had him in the first two weeks of daycare (only a 2-star). The 3-star has Awesome reviews for developmental learning at all ages, but ..... I'm just don't know. Damn it!!

[elektra]

I don't know how it works at daycares with regards to the bottles and food, but I would be freaking out if another baby got my breastmilk and I would also be freaking out if my child was fed someone else's milk or formula or anything other than what I had sent for him.
I hope you figure out what is going on. So hard figuring out childcare.

[Cam&Clay]

This happened to a friend of mine. She went to pick up her DS and he was laying there drinking a bottle...of formula. He was breast fed and she pumped. She was pissed and heads rolled.

Luckily, there were no side effects, but the bottles were labeled with the babies names. Not mixing them up is so important.

[MamaMolly]

DD was only in daycare a few weeks (so what do I know?), but IIWY I'd speak to the director about it. JMHO but if the bottle is labeled there is no excuse. Teenie bopper or not, they need to check and double check.

My DD has food allergies and I was on an elimination/restricted diet while BF. On top of the lovely green poops at your house, there is no telling what the other baby might be suffering. Keeping the bottles straight is a safety issue.

For now I'd put aside the bottle issue (about it being expensive) and focus on the issue of best practices. I think it is fair to tell them that you are disappointed, seeing as this is one of the top ranked child care facilities in your area.

FWIW the idea of DD having someone else's milk doesn't skeeve me out in general. It is that the milk is an unknown...quality, from an unknown person that I'd mind. We all have different comfort levels about what we eat and drink while BFing. The way I see it is that breastmilk banks test their stash, you know? One of my BFFs breast fed her niece when she was baby sitting because Mama was running really late. She called and asked first, though! ;)

[WatchingThemGrow]

Ugh. I don't know what to say, but that's not okay. With allergies of all sorts, intolerances, etc. they need to know how dangerous that is. Interesting that it is rated one of the top ones when they don't have the same teacher M-F and that the "subs" aren't ingrained to double check things like that!

I wouldn't worry TOO much about the changing poo, though, unless he's showing other signs of being sick. Poo changes a lot over the course of time and every change can tend to freak us out.

[DrSally]

So not OK! I would be talking to the director too. If nothing else, so that she can do some retraining/re-emphasizing on this issue. Where do I begin...DS had a milk allergy until age 2, and I was on an elimination diet for dairy. Also, he has a severe peanut allergy, so I wasn't eating any peanuts or nuts. When he did get formula, it was Alimentum. Giving him regular formula could've caused an anaphalactic reaction, like it did the first time he got it. Also, in terms of someone elses BM, there is the infectious disease issue as far as what can be transmitted via BM. Now, don't freak out. In all likelihood, this mom didn't have any infectious diseases, but it's a bodily fluid, and should be handled with respect as such, KWIM?

I agree with watchingthemgrow about not being too worried about the poop. It was a one time thing and most likely did not affect your DS, but it shouldn't have happened in the first place and should NOT happen again.

I've never had children in daycare, so take this for what it's worth. But, for an infant, I personally would prefer a small, family daycare, and a center with lots of programs for a toddler.

[AshleyAnn]

FYI - Good start formula causes green/dark smelly poops. So I wouldn't worry about him getting something dangerous or having an allergy. I would be much much more upset if it were BM from another mother than formula - there can be some nasty stuff in EBM. I'd also be worried about them heating the milk in the warmer for a long period of time and it going bad before they feed it to him. Yuck. I'd call the director on this - if nothing else to start a paper trail of any issues youre having. If no one tells him/her about this sort of thing it wont be fixed.

I'd KILL my sitter over lossing a bottle. DD got hooked on a preemie nipple in the hospital and now the ONLY bottle she can use is the old style playtex ventaire standard bottle with a slow flow nipple. I buy those suckers on ebay and consider $9 bucks each a steal. Hopefully your bottle turns up!

[ThreeofUs]

O.M.G.

I would document, send a letter with the information, my concerns and a request for a meeting with the director. Formally, with a follow-up phone call. So they would know, immediately, that I was taking this extremely seriously and that I expected them to do so as well.

I would be sure to point out that I changed day cares to them because of their stellar reputation, and that I would be very sorry if something happened to sully that reputation. But I would make it very clear that I expected them to take steps to ensure this never happens again, and that I expected an investigation and resolution for my particular situation.

I. would. be. SO. pissed.

[newg]

Like pp have said......I would be absolutely pissed........I know what's in my BM and what's not in it.....even if you don't have to worry about allergies, that would still be a good point to bring up to help hit home how big a mistake a bottle mix-up can be. I have a friend who couldn't do formula because her son was allergic to dairy and soy and went into anaphalatic (sp?) shock with either type of formula. She had to excusively BF with no dairy in her diet........and also what pp said about overheating it....you do that and I think it can take away some of the nutrients.........

You are paying them to not make mistakes like that.

[Snow mom]

My DD received about 2 oz of someone elses BM around 8 mos before the DCP realized she had given DD the wrong bottle. Don't get me wrong, I was definitely pissed, but I think your situation would piss me off in a whole different way. My daycare was totally honest and upfront about what had happened. I would have had no way to know that DD had received someone else's BM if they hadn't volunteered the info. It sounds to me like your daycare has no idea what happened. Was their some insinuation that your DS had received someone else's bottle or did you just think that because of the change in poop? I think best case scenario is he didn't actually receive a bottle (as the one that was in the warmer was for you to feed him) and someone just accidentally grabbed your bottle when packing up. Things like that definitely happen, especially when someone who doesn't usually pick up their LO (like a dad who usually has mom pick up) is left in charge of gathering stuff for their LO. Maybe your bottle will come back today with an explanation of what happened. Then your only loss would be the milk that was in it.

[wellyes]

Mistakes OK.

Saying nonchalantly "oh, oops, must've given someone else your breastmilk" so fundamentally wrong that I have no words. Hell no.

[MamaMolly]

I think best case scenario is he didn't actually receive a bottle (as the one that was in the warmer was for you to feed him) and someone just accidentally grabbed your bottle when packing up. .

Oh, Good point! That makes sense. When I read the OP I just assumed that she knew that her DS got someone else's bottle. But now that I've re-read it I see that we don't know for sure.

For sure I would still try to find out, though. Cause she knows someone else's baby got her milk. And that is just not ok, no matter who's baby gets the wrong milk.

[czekit7]

Thank you for all of your suggestions and support! I know it's been 5 days now, and I've mentioned it to his regular teachers, but I will call the director today.

[mctlaw]

This must happen more than we think it should, which is frightening. When DS was a baby, my breastmilk was given to another baby although my child did not receive any in turn. I was not thrilled but I imagine I would have been livid had I been the parents of the child who received someone else's breastmilk. The incident had to be reported to the state, and I imagine this is so in your state as well, so you may want to mention that in your discussions.

And my daycare was/is a top accredited facility.

[TonFirst]

and THEN he goes 40hrs without pooping (which my DS will normally have two-three poopy diapers a day), which of course freaked me out...he's only 11 weeks old.

I just wanted to add that suddenly going for days without a poop for an EBF baby is totally, completely normal. Really. It freaked me the heck out the first time it happened with my son, I called the ped repeatedly, they told me it was normal - and, lo and behold, it is. Just pray that when they finally DO poop, it's on the 3-star daycare's watch, and not yours, because Katie bar the doors, it's an awful mess!

[gatorsmom]

...and THEN he goes 40hrs without pooping (which my DS will normally have two-three poopy diapers a day), which of course freaked me out...he's only 11 weeks old.

Not pooping suddenly for days is pretty normal for babies. Mine were ebf for the first 11 months (the twins were 7 months) and weren't in daycare and I think they all did this, even with no changes in feeding schedules. I remember several times wondering what I'd eaten that they hadn't pooped in days. Then, just as I was getting worried- bam! blow-out diaper. But, it really worried me, especially with my first baby.


As for the daycare's nonchalant attitude about the bottle mixup, I would be livid. I agree with Dr. Sally that as unlikely as it is, breast milk can carry diseases like any other bodily fluid. The daycare is playing with a loaded gun with their attitude toward something like this.