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View Full Version : Long post...having a real stressful sad week already!



plusbellelavie
03-16-2010, 07:07 AM
I swear whoever said that bad things come in three was not wrong...I have had a really stressful 48 hours and know it is going to be a long week!

Yesterday morning at 6 am my 7.5 yr old left for her first "voyage" away from the family with her 3rd Grade class for a week...miss her so much it hurts especially since this is the first time she has been away overnight from one of us! (I have only left her for the birth of her younger brother and I made DH go home to sleep and to check on the DC rather then stay with me after the birth because I am so overly attached to them) so this trip is harder on me then on her I think! She was so happy to go so that help make it a little easier to send her.So DH drops her off only to call me to tell me that DD best friend end up not going on the trip because she has a gastro with fever! Awww so sad the girls were looking forward to sharing a room and entire experience together...I felt awful for both of them.

Go to drop off DS1 at school later in the morning to find out that a little boy in 2nd Grade both parents were killed on Sunday morning in single car accident...apparently driving too fast on a small country road! So terrible for the little boy who is a complete Mamas boy his face lit up every time he saw his mother at the end of the day it was beautiful to watch!! Obviously the entire school is in shock and so sad for the little one!

The admistrator decided to not tell the two classes who left for their trips about the death which I have to say I am grateful for because my DD knows the little boy well and the mother too since the kids having been taking tennis lessons together for years plus playing in school...I think it is best that she is home before she is told so we can help her deal with everything.

But unfortunately my day was not finished the little girl who lost her mother to cancer in my DD class 3 weeks ago wanted to go on the class trip with her classmates and her father agreed but yesterday afteroon at the end of classes a close family friend of the girl came to tell the mothers who were there that the dog that the little girl parents gave to her in Sept was gone and they had looked all day with no luck! She asked us all to look for the dog because if the girl came back and the dog was gone they are not sure how she will handle it all since it was a gift from her mother!

There is no humane society here in France to bring lost dog so last night another mother and I went to the two local vets to tell them what was happening and we are hoping that someone will pick up the dog and bring it to them!

I swear I didn't want to go to school this morning because I don't want to hear any more bad news or any kind! My DS1 was happy to go because I kept hugging and kissing him and telling him how much I love him...i wish I could do it to his sister too though!

It really just the start of the week and I feel emotionally drained and at complete lost at what to do...I have done mindless things for hours, wrote delated, wrote and re delated this post and surfed the web for stupid things, and just cried but now I am not sure what I am crying for my DD, the parents, the little boy, the little girl, the dumb dog ....I am just a wreck!!!

It helps to share but I feel so helpless because even though I know these people I am not family and I don't know how to help positively!

thanks for reading...

MoJo
03-16-2010, 07:15 AM
:grouphug: I wish you could hug your DD too!

And eventually, I know you will find positive ways to help these people.

WatchingThemGrow
03-16-2010, 07:19 AM
Wow. That's a lot to deal with! I'm shocked a 7yo can go away for a week with her class, and the rest of the stuff is just so sad. Are there school counselors or social workers in France who can help people set up really practical ways to help the families? Maybe a carecalendar.org thing would give some ideas about how to help. About dealing with the stuff in general...I'd likely just be praying for them all. Are you able to talk to your DD on the phone each night?

plusbellelavie
03-16-2010, 08:40 AM
This is a private school...technically Catholic but not strict...no counselors just the local priest. Everyone is at a loss at what to do...I think the principal has called the mayors office to see if they can offer any help but basically the attitude in France is that it is more up to each individual family to do what it is best and that each teacher has to be the "counselor" for their class as a whole. But it is possible that the mayor can send private counselors to help but it is his decision...but I hope he decides that the kids and the teachers need some professional guidance dealing with this one!

I know that the 2nd Grade teacher is at a total loss on what to do for this young boy...he wanted to come to school yesterday but his Aunt and Grandmother wouldn't let him...they told him he could go on Thursday...we will see if that happens!! He is obviously doesn't understand and just want to find his friends. Knowing this little boy I know that when he finally comprehends/realizes that he is going to be devastated...he is an only child and his parents but especially his mother was his world! They were so young too...only 35 both of them and the mother who all of us knew best a real lovely lady! It just makes you more grateful for the little things when you think about it really....

Unfortuantely because the kids are so young on the trip (in France starting in Kindergarten depending if the teacher wants to organize it or not that year the kids can go for week voyage with the class....and no parents are allowed to go with the kids at all but there are other trained adults/teachers that go with the class!) that they don't let them talk on the phone to the parents because otherwise they would have tons of crying kids each night! But we do get updates on a blog or at school they post what the kids are doing every night so that does help a little!

But yeah I would LOVE to just hug my little girl and tell he how much I appreciate and love her....It took a lot of convincing by my DH, her teacher, her friends mother, my mom and her for me to let her go...and I feel awful that I feel guilty for just wanting her here with me now to talk to her and hug her! I have to wait for Sunday though...I just hope that that the school is able to keep the information away from the kids until they are home and the parents can be there to support them after they get the news!

thank you for the posts and for the website I will look at it!

arivecchi
03-16-2010, 11:13 AM
My heart hurts for those little ones who have lost their parents. :hug: Hugs to you as well. That is a lot to bear. :grouphug:

elephantmeg
03-16-2010, 12:14 PM
I'm so sorry.