What do you do when you don't do a b'day party?

[jayali]

For various reasons we are not planning on having a birthday party for Matthew this year. Last year we did a party combined with another friend of his. This year we were going to skip the friend's party and now I am sort of feeling bad. Not that we are big party people to begin with, but I want to make sure his day is special. We will send in a treat to his class and probably go out for dinner and have a cake with his Aunties, but I think that will be it.

He has been invited to so many parties this year - some very over the top - so I think he may feel bad that we are not having some sort of celebration for him. His birthday is in May and with Mother's Day and Communion obligations we are sort of limited to possible dates. Plus he is going to be going to a different school next year and I would probably want to invite his friends from that school but if I invite any of the kids in his current school I feel like I have to invite all 15 of them. I am running out of time and don't know what to do.

Sooooo - how can I make his day special without planning a major party to celebrate?

[brittone2]

we had DS's first big party since his first bday party last year when he was 5. For his 6th bday, i was hugely pregnant and not in the mood to do a huge party. We suggested some ideas (would have done a party if he expressed that it was a big deal to miss it) like bowling (he had been asking to go, and has never gone) with a friend plus go out to lunch, or stay in a local hotel with an indoor pool (something else he had expressed an interest in previously).

He opted for bowling. We had one of his best friends and her family meet up with us, and we did bumper bowling w/ the kiddos, then out to lunch at Red Robin. That was the day before his actual birthday. On his actual birthday, we went out to dinner (he got to choose and selected a Hibachi restaurant) and had cake with his grandparents. He was totally satisfied with that (phew!).

[schums]

My DC have only had one "real" friend party (when they turned 6). Normally, we let them pick dinner or the restaurant on both their actual b-day and the weekend day we do the family party on (g-parents, uncle come over for cake and ice cream). I usually try to put out the birthday tablecloth and napkins the night before their actual birthday too. Aside from that, we don't do a ton. DD's b-day is in the summer, so we might go swimming or something that day, but DS is usally in school on his b-day so our options are more limited.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I would let him choose one or 2 close friends and take them somewhere fun- bowling, mini golf, amusement park, movies, water park...

Or, this was a hit here for Christmas one year- my mom took ds to a hotel overnight. He played in the pool, had room service and just loved it.

I think that a party can be any size so long as there is cake, presents and maybe some decorations + a general fuss. :) Even if it is just your immediate family that is ok. But, it can be nice to share it with a few more people. Just invite low maintenance people that are fun and easy to hang out with.

I love b-day parties but can see how they don't always work out. So long as something special happens it's good. To me, birthdays are a big deal and deserve to be celebrated.

Beth