How much long-term financial planning do you take the lead on in your marriage?

[american_mama]

How much long-term financial planning falls to you in your marriage, stuff like retirement planning, college savings, home purchase/mortgage/re-finance, health/life/car insurance. I am not asking as much about the weekly and monthly bill paying, even though I know the two are inter-connected.

I probably do about 90% of the long-term stuff, if not more, and I find it stressful. There is no one to check my mistakes, follow up to ask if we're on top of X or Y, and I often wonder if we're making dire mistakes because of it. DH and his family have little experience with financial planning, and it's not something he talks about with his friends. It's not on his radar screen. If anyone is going to figure out if we should re-finance the house, or buy a stock, or what 529 to start, it has to be me, and I find it hard.

I talked about this a lot with my parents this summer (they're both pretty into this) and I am learning to bounce ideas off of them. DH is interested and willing, but very, very far from taking the lead in this. I am also going to more personal finance seminars, making more appointments, may take a course, and we may just hire a personal financial planner.

So, how much of the long-term financial planning do you take the lead on?

[edurnemk]

We pretty much do all that planning together

DS tends to stress more thinking over the best strategy, but we discuss and decide together.

[AnnieW625]

We are 50/50. Both DH and I have 401k, and 457 plans through our employer (we both work for the state, but in different divisions). I am responsible for mine, and he is responsible for his. Right now we both also have pensions. It's really the best plan for us because we have never had to meet with a money manager, although if DH gets a job that doesn't have pension we'll most likely have to go down that road (and honestly it makes me a little nervous). I have been a state employee since I was 22 so the current retirement plan of pensions, and 401K/457 is all I have ever known.

[pinkmomagain]

My dh takes the lead on this but asks me for input/opinions. That's just the way I like it.

[WolfpackMom]

DH doesnt have a retirement account yet (eek but we are still pretty young atleast), I have my 401k and a few mutual funds. I have a financial planner by way of my parents whom I really need to speak to more about these kinds of things. I think both DH and I will take on more active efforts for retirement accounts etc once we get student loans and my car paid off. For education accounts, we have been lucky enough to have my parents set up an education fund for DS that is already fully funded, our financial planner takes care of it and I honestly know very little about it because my dad just created it a month ago. Once I get that information I am sure I will be the person taking care of that 100%.

[wellyes]

We view our various retirement accounts (IRAs, 401k, rollover) as one big pot so it makes sense to have one person in charge of making sure it's properly diversified.

But we're also pretty much "all index funds / buy and hold" so there isn't that much management that needs to be done, aside from figuring out how much we can contribute.

[boolady]

I probably do about 90% of the long-term stuff, if not more, and I find it stressful. There is no one to check my mistakes, follow up to ask if we're on top of X or Y, and I often wonder if we're making dire mistakes because of it. DH and his family have little experience with financial planning, and it's not something he talks about with his friends. It's not on his radar screen. If anyone is going to figure out if we should re-finance the house, or buy a stock, or what 529 to start, it has to be me, and I find it hard.

DH is interested and willing, but very, very far from taking the lead in this.

This is our situation, almost to a T. DH's parents did little to no financial planning whatsoever, not because they couldn't have saved, but they didn't. They also did nothing to talk to or teach DH about long-term (or short-term, really) financial planning or savings. He understands what I tell him, but like the PP said, it's not really on his radar screen. It's strange to me, because it's not like he doesn't care or worry about retirement, college, etc. It just literally doesn't seem to occur to him to ponder it often, if at all.

It all works out for the most part, because I'm a retentive freak about things like this, so I say "Let's do A, B, or C," and he says "Okay." We don't do anything really risky and I research it to death, so I hope we're okay.

[boltfam]

My dh takes the lead on this but asks me for input/opinions. That's just the way I like it.
:yeahthat:

[TwinFoxes]

I do long term, DH does short term. We are both happiest that way.

OP, a fee based financial planner might help you. A fee based planner doesn't get commission from products they sell you, so you shouldn't have to wonder if they're giving you the best advice. DH and I saw one, and found it quite helpful.

[Binkandabee]

I do 100% of it. DH knows he has an IRA and he knows its with Fidelity...but has no idea what its invested in, his rate of return or anything like that. He knows the girls each have 529 accounts and he knows where (West Virginia), but again knows nothing about what they are invested in or how much is in each of them. He's fine with me being in charge of this, and I am too so it works out fine.

Every so often I will send DH an email that has the balances of all the accounts just so he can see big picture where we are...but it's literally nothing more than the account name and the current balance.

[JoyNChrist]

I do 100%. Short and long term. DH is horrible with money, so he gets his weekly budget for expenses and I take care of everything else.

It doesn't really bother me. I'm a control freak so I like being in charge. We joke that our financial situation is "he makes it, she manages it." Works for us.

[katydid1971]

Dh is great with short term finances and I take care of all the long term stuff. I enjoy doing the research and talking with our Financial Planner. DH pay all the bills and watches our regular bank account more. It kind of reflects our personalities, he tends to worry about the short term in general more where I tend to worry about the long term more. We compliment each other well like that.

[jgenie]

I do 100% of it. DH knows we have accounts at certain banks but couldn't tell you anything else. We're planning to hire a financial advisor in the very near future.

[katydid1971]

I think it's awesome that so many of us are in charge of the family's funds!! Go Girls!!

[Corie]

My DH is in the financial industry so he is the expert. I let him handle everything.

He really enjoys doing it and I have no interest.

[maestramommy]

I voted 25%, although we discuss a lot and Dh does ask me some about strategy.

[jent]

I am, by default. DH has absolutely no interest at all, to the point where I had to set up a IRA in his name because he just procrastinated doing it himself. However, I wouldn't consider myself "expert" or even knowledgeable-- I really to need to see a financial planner. Basically, I always feel I must be doing it all wrong.

[niccig]

We do 50/50 - discuss and then do it. DH takes care of his 401K, mine is in Australia, so he lets me deal with that, and there's no much to do with mine. We're both talking about long term finances more.

I'm going to make an appt for us with a financial planner. We might be on track, we might not be, so I think it's worth an appointment to see where we stand.

[JBaxter]

None. DH and his financial planner ( child hood family friend) handle it. I see the papers come in every month/ quarter DH shows me what "my" stuff is doing and our joint accounts. Im fine with it. We didnt do to bad in the last down turn ... did do to MUCH either.

[gatorsmom]

DH is a whiz with numbers and business dealings. So, he'll tell me what he wants to do and what his plans are and I let him know if I'm comfortalbe with that or ask questions. He's responsible for the money around here.

Likewise, I'm responsible for the kids' educations and well-being. I had planned on sending them to a private school and I told him my plans and he agreed. He goes to the conferences but I"m the one asking the questions and discussing stuff with the teachers. As an offshoot of this, I set up the kids' 509 plans and monitor the contributions to those accounts. But that's about it.

[lchang25000]

My dh takes the lead on this but asks me for input/opinions. That's just the way I like it.

:yeahthat: