How do you deal with bedtime stalling

[DietCokeLover]

Every SINGLE night, before I put DD to bed, I ask her to go to the potty. Then, I encourage her to go ahead and try. She always says she does not need to go. Then, every SINGLE night, once she has been in bed for 10 minutes or so, she says she has to go potty.

This infuriates me for some reason. I guess it just pushes a button.

I know she is stalling going to bed, and though she typically does have to go to the bathroom - I am bothered that she won't go when I ask her to before getting in bed.

How do you deal with what you know are deliberate stall tactics about bedtime?

[KathyN115]

This made me laugh, only because my 4 year old DD does the exact same thing. I am always surprised when she goes to sleep without coming out of her room. Tonight she had to pee, then she came back out to see what I was watching on TV. Ugh, GO TO BED!!! I just keep sending her back, if I get really mad I threaten to take one of her stuffed animals each time she comes out, and I get to choose which one. She has one bear she loves, so that usually works.

[edurnemk]

My 2.8 yo does the same thing, but after the potty, comes the "I'm thirsty, I need water", another 10 minutes go by and he finds some other excuse: he's scared, he wants me to pull the blanket up, sometimes he just says "I need something", "What do you need?" "Umh...." (last night he said he needed medicine :rotflmao:)

Lately, after the second time he calls me, I tell him I won't be coming back into his room until the next morning. He's cried a few times, but I know I need to stick to it.

It drives me insane. This is why I refuse to move him to a bed, he will stay in his crib as long as humanly possible! ;) That, and the fact he wakes up before 6 am most days.

[citymama]

We deal with this too - except it's not once, but multiple times that she says she needs to get out of bed to use the potty. Our strategy (yet to be implemented) is going to be to move her Bjorn stand alone potty inside her room. So even if she gets up she doesn't get to leave the room. We don't want to say she can't get up to use the bathroom - what if she really does need to go? (highly unlikely but not worth risking it) Try and keep cool and humor her and try and make getting up an unattractive prospect if possible!

[Indianamom2]

How do I deal with my 6 yr. old's stalling (much the same thing at SIX)?

Lots and lots and lots of cookies....for me. :wavey:


Honestly, if you get it figured out, please let me know. DD is a horrid sleeper, although all-day K has helped.

[gatorsmom]

Well, I KNOW some of my kids will stall going pee and getting pjs on so I have them do as much as possible while the family is still playing in the family room the 30 minutes before we go upstairs to bed. When I ask them to go to the bathroom while we are still in the family room, they will go no question. i also ask them all to put their jammies on while we are still hanging out and watching TV. And they just run up, get jammies on and come back down.

The last thing I do is bribe them to go upstairs with the promise of a chewy vitamin. When I suggest we go upstairs to read books before bed they stall. If I suggest we go upstairs to get our vitamins, they race each other up there. :rolleye0014: Then all they have to do is brush their teeth and get into bed. Then I read books to the twins and DH reads to the boys and vice versa after prayers.

[lalasmama]

La did the bedtime stall about pottying as well.

Before I tell you what I did, though, I will tell you that I can be a toughie when I know La's testing limits. Oh, and the only time she's ever wet the bed was when my (not really smart) dad and stepmom let her sleep with a huge sippy cup of juice when she was 3.5 years old.

When she was about 4.5years old, she puked one night. New mom that I was (she'd only lived with me full time for about a year at that point), I called the advice nurse. She let me know that there was a bug going around, and the pukies are followed by the runs. So, 3 hours after I put her to bed, I hear her crying, saying she needs to go potty. I walk her into the bathroom since she's not used to being up in a dark house. She pees-- no diarrhea, so I'm counting my blessings! Goes back to bed, and I hear her chatting with some stuffed animals. I walked in, took the offending animals (Froggy and Elmo), and walked out, no words said. She went to sleep.

Night 2, the call comes about 90 minutes after bed. Now, she hadn't puked in 24 hours, hadn't had any diarrhea, and was largely back to herself, so I thought it was kind of odd, but allowed her to get up and go potty, despite the fact she had gone right before crawling into bed.

Quick note--we have always been a "no fluids after dinner" family (well, except when my dad believes my child and lets her take 10 ounces of juice to bed with her), and she has always done a potty-pajamas-bed routine, so that bedtime is happening about 15 minutes after peeing.

So, Night 2, she gets up, pees, and goes back to bed. I hear chattering. Now, she's got her frog... and Elmo... and her Cabbage Patch Kids.... I walk in, remove the party, and leave. She goes to sleep, after whining.

Night 3. Pee. Pajamas. Bed. 45 minutes later, the call comes, and she's heading to the potty. You see where this is headed, right? Yep... after she returns from peeing, she assembles her gang, now including: the frog, the Elmo, 4 Cabbage Patch Kids, her "Snap-N-Style" dolls, and a duck, in her bed, and she's chattering with them all. Elmo and Duck are planning a tea party at Frog's house, and the Snap dolls need to know what to wear.

Night 4, aka, "Mommy's Slow, But Finally Caught On" Night. Every toy available heads up for a slumber party on the top bunk bed. She pees, she poops, she happily gets in her pajamas, snuggles into bed (bottom bunk!), complains about how lonely it is, I point out that everyone is on the top bunk watching over her, and she goes to bed. 5 minutes later, she summons me to take her to the potty. Mean mom I am (and knowing that she wouldn't wet the bed), told her "Nope, you just went. You have peed out all the peepees there are. I know you are trying to get out of bed and play, and that's not how we do things. Bed time. Now. Goodnight." She persists, "But I'm going to have a pee pee accident." I remain steadfast, "Well, I'm sorry, but you will be sleeping in it if you choose to pee in your bed." She protested for another 30 seconds, did a "hrmph", and was asleep and snoring in minutes.

Now, at 6, I tell her when I am putting her to bed that if I hear her, she's losing a Silly Bandz each time, and that she will find out in the morning how many and which ones she lost.

She knows that her bedtime is the adults' quiet time, and that she will get some very cranky adults if she fakes 102 reasons why she can't go to bed. Oh, and once the lights are off and I say "goodnight", I now refuse to go in there for "anything". (Of course, in an emergency, I would.) But, the major point is that she knows she's not going to get the attention after I have told her goodnight.

[Roni]

I'm still dealing w/ stalling @ 7 & 10. Two things that help--I've started the going-to-bed ritual earlier, & I designate a time that I'm "off-duty"--i.e., if they want me to scratch their backs or read with them, they better be in bed before that. Also, like a PP said, I'll have them get on their PJ's, etc. while we're hanging out (during a commercial, if we're watching tv).