Did your older DC visit you in the hospital after delivery?

[lowrioh]

Now that we're in the final countdown I was thinking about whether DH should bring DD to the hospital to visit me and meet her new sister? DD is 27 months and pretty active. I'm not sure if it is good for her to come and meet DD2 before we bring her home or if seeing me in the hospital will upset her.

FWIW, my Mom or sister will be staying at our house with DD while I'm at the hospital. I have left her with my Mom for a week while I was away for work and DH came along with me and she did fine.
So, if you had a toddler, did you take them to the hospital after the new baby was born?

[ThreeofUs]

Yes, but only for a 1/2 hour at a time. And we had activities to do in the room during that time. Otherwise it's too long....

[maydaymommy]

Ds1 was 28 months when ds2 was born. He came to visit at least once. He got a present from the new baby that thrilled him and also kept him busy. It was nice to have him there, and he was having so much fun & had so many plans with my mom and sister that it was easier for him to leave me there than we expected it to be.

[jse107]

Absolutely. O came for about an hour. He was excited to meet E, but our fondest memory of the day is when the he was so excited to eat the "dead fish!" (fish sticks) that came for lunch. :) He was 3 at the time.

It's a wonderful time and it's reassuring for the LO's to see that you're fine!

Congratulations!!!! Wishing you all the best for a smooth, uncomplicated delivery!

[wellyes]

We had MIL bring DD to meet her younger brother - maybe 45 minutes? She did great. She was 23 months.

I was surprised about how matter-of-fact she was about having a new baby that mom was holding. And I was so happy to see her at that point too.

She wasnt' upset to see me in the hospital. I think it would be different if I were hooked up to machines or looking sick. If your delivery is really difficult and it impacts you physically maybe reconsider, otherwise I'd go for it.

[wendibird22]

Yes, DD1 was 29mos when DD2 arrive. DH brought her to the hospital a couple times after the baby arrived. We had DD1 bring her present for the baby and we gave her a big sister gift then. I agree to keep the visit short and to have things to do. I think we actually had her visit during a meal time so that she'd be occupied by eating her lunch/dinner. Now that I think about it I'm almost certain that DH went home to get DD1 and brought her back with her dinner. She visited, ate, put on her pj's, I read her a story, and DH took her home for bed. It worked out well.

DD1 was interested in the baby for about 5mins and then was on to other things. DD1 wasn't scared at all by the hospital.

[lowrioh]

We did get her a gift from her new sister....a little camera that her BFF has that she ALWAYS plays with.

[baymom]

Definitely! DS came to visit for only about 1/2 an hour with my Mom (he was 19 months) and was so excited to be there. We had talked up him becoming a big brother and he was thrilled to finally see her. It is as big a moment for your older one as it is your your DH and yourself, IMO.

[Octobermommy]

Yes, ds was 23 months when baby ds was born. My parents brought the kids up and we had gifts from the baby to the big siblings. It was very sweet. It was the day after he was born.

[AnnieW625]

No DD1 couldn't come and visit me in the hospital:(. Our hospital because of the whole H1N1 scare didn't allow any visitors under the age of 13. DD2 was born in April too, and Kaiser claims that flu season is active until July:shake:. I went home a day earlier than I should have because of this.

[infocrazy]

DS1 came to visit DS2 and I. He was 21 months. He was fine. I don't think he stayed too long. I couldn't believe how big he looked with my new baby.

DS1 and DS2 (4.5 and 33 months at the time) did NOT come to visit DD. We had her at 5 am ish on Wed and were home around 11 am on Thu. If they had made me stay another night they would have visited but it made more sense to keep them home and meet her there.

[jgenie]

No. DS1 had never been away from me and we were worried that my having to stay would be too hard on him. We left for the hospital after he was asleep on a Monday night - DS2 was born at 11:00 that night. DH was home Tuesday morning when DS1 woke up and I was home Wed. at noon.

[LarsMal]

Yes, both times.

L was 16 months when M was born. I had her around 10PM on a Friday night. DH brought him to the hospital Saturday afternoon and a couple more times after that. He did fine, but he was/is also a Daddy's boy so he didn't mind being away from me!

I had C around 5PM on a Wednesday. My mom brought L&M (3.5 and 28 months at the time) to visit while I was still in recovery. I think in hindsight I would've waited until I got to my room, but they were fine. They visited for a little while and then came back again the next day for a few hours.

[SunCB]

I know with DS2 that DS1 came but it was only a 30 mins trip. Now for DD, I actually cannot recall the boys coming. It was 1.5 hrs away so for them to have a 3 hr trip for such a short time would not have been worth it plus I was only for about 29 hrs total (3.5 for L&D, 24 after then just a bit more for final discharge bc they took longer than expected).

[SnuggleBuggles]

Ds1 was 5.5 and he came for about 20 minutes before he wanted to leave. I had ds2 at a birth center though so was home a few hours after the birth. If we were separated longer from ds1 I would really have wanted to see him, even if meeting the baby wasn't a priority to him.

Beth

[Momof3Labs]

Yes, both times, but only short visits.

[ellies mom]

My oldest was four so a little older but yeah, she came to the hospital several times. My mom was in town so she would stay with DD1 at night while DH stayed with me at the hospital. They would mosey on over when they got done their morning activities. DD would spend some time with us in the room and then DH would take her out for several hours while my mom stayed with me. When they got back to the room, my mom would take her home for the night. It worked out really well for us. We had a gift waiting for her from her sister so she so was happy with that.

One thing you might want to ask about is the visitor policy during flu season. I had my Family Birth rotation last fall and most of the hospitals were not allowing children in the family birth units at all and were limiting the number of visitors overall. There isn't as much hoopla around the flu season this year but I would still ask.

[Roni]

Yes--when dd2 was born, it was also my b-day, so dd1 came right over, met her sister and had cake! (She was 3.) This time, they had to wait until after school the next day, since dd3 was born after 10 pm.

[lmwbasye]

My mom stayed with Liam and she took him by the hospital for an hour or so each day. On the final day, DH went home and picked up Liam and brought him to the hospital so he could be part of bringing George home. He loved it and there were no troubles at all. In fact, he was excited to see all the cool stuff and to see that I was okay.

ETA: The first day, George "gave" Liam a present for becoming a big brother and he was entertained by playing with that in the hospital as well.

[kdeunc]

Yes they did visit. DS1 had turned two the week before DS2 was born. He was brought for a short visit the day after DS2 was born (late afternoon csection). When DD was born both boys visited for a very short time. DS1 was 5 and DS 2 was 3. DS two seemed a little more nervous/anxious about me being in the hospital. All three births were csections so I still had IV fluids and had to talk about my incision and not being able to pick DS2 up. That said, I would still opt to have them there for a very short visit. Cramped hospital rooms do not make good play spaces for active kids! :) But they would have been disappointed to not meet their little sister at the hospital.

[MommyAllison]

No, we didn't want DD to come to the hospital, for a few reasons. We thought it might scare her (previous traumatic hospitalization for her), we knew she would want to stay with DH & I rather than going home with grandma (she'd never been away from me overnight before, and was still nursing), and we didn't want her to have to say "hi, bye" to DS. We didn't have any visitors in the hospital with DS, because we wanted DD to meet him first. When we got home, she got her "big sister" gift and gave DS the gift she'd picked out for him, held him, etc. It was perfect, and we'll do it the same way if we have another baby in the hospital.

ETA: I was only gone for about 30 hours. If I'd had a c-section with a longer stay, we would have done things differently.

[eliasmom]

My parents brought DD for maybe 30 minutes or less. She was semi-interested in DS, obsessed with DH and good ol' mom was just plain invisible. She got over that within a day or two of our coming home from the hospital.

[wencit]

Yup, the day after delivery, DS1 (who was a bit over 3yo at the time) came to meet his little brother for about an hour. DS1 is now 4 1/2 and STILL talks about how his baby brother brought him a huge lollipop and cookie when he was born. ;)

[sste]

No, but I think it can be a very nice thing. In my case DH works in a hospital and from the age of 2 DS has understood that daddy works with very sick people in the hospital, the ambulance brings people to the hospital, if he runs into the street without one of us he may have to go to the hospital and the doctors can't always fix you. So, for him, going to the hospital would have been potentially upsetting because he knows it as a place for broken people. Plus, I was not in great shape and didn't want him to see me like that.

[bubbaray]

Yes, DD#1 was not quite 3 and my BFF and her husband (drove 5 hours in winter!) came and looked after her while I had my c/s -- it was at 8:30am and they brought her around 10am -- can't remember how long they stayed. We had a "gift bag" from DD#2 to DD#1 (LE canvas tote with her name on it, stuffed with all sorts of activities, DVDs, etc for my friend to do with DD#1 while I was at the hospital).

[newg]

Yes....DD1 was almost exactly 2.5 when DD2 was born. My mom and sister were staying with her at our house and they brought her the day after DD2 was born. She was born at night, so it wouldn't have worked out, plus I wanted to be able to get out of bed, be showered and free from the ivs and cathader (sp?).
DD2 gave DD1 a gift when she came in the room; a brand new baby doll. She was so excited. We also had her come at dinner time. So she sat on the bed with me and ate subway while everyone visited. My mom and sis took her home for bath and bedtime. DH took her out to the car and gave her a bag of teddy grahams to munch on in the car (this helped her "forget" she was leaving me and the new baby).
It actually worked out a lot better than I thought it would. She was not worried at all about me being in the hospital. She knew that DD2 was going to be there and she'd finally get to meet her. The only thing that bothered her was seeing DD2 get checked out by the doctors......she thought they were hurting DD2 because she was crying, so DH to her to look at the nursery to see all of the other babies.

[Canna]

Well, DD#2 was born at home, and DD#1 was there also. She slept through nearly all my labor, woke up in time to see #2 being born, stayed around for a little while, then went to playgroup with a friend (it was morning), came back, etc. She was 35 months old.

If we had gone to the hospital for some reason, we would have encouraged her to visit. I remember being three when my sister was born and being very upset that visiting rules didn't allow me to actually visit my mom's room. I had to stay in the lobby and my sense of justice was aroused - I didn't think kids were any germier than other people!

[JBaxter]

Yes Logan came later that day ( he ws 3 at the time and Connor was born at 1am) Logan and Connor were in the room when Nathan was born ( 12 & 9) and Logan & Connor were with Nathan in the waiting room when Jack was born and were back as soon as things got cleaned up. The next day Dh brought Nathan after preschool and we hung out all afternoon.

[tabegle]

DD was 19 months and she visited both days I was in the hospital for no more than 2 hours each day. She did great! She also got a baby of her own to hold while mommy held the new brother. :)

She wasn't scared at all.

I read a long time ago that kids generally do not see/notice all the tubes and wires connected to a person wheras the adults do see that.

Good luck!

[pb&j]

DS was almost 3 when DD was born. He was staying with my parents while we were in the hospital - they live just a couple blocks from the hospital, so they walked over for a short visit just after DD was born. He also came the next day, as we were getting ready to go home.

My parents were there with him the whole time. He had a great time, and was a very proud big brother!!

[elephantmeg]

DS (25 months) came in a few min to meet his new sister. He sat on my bed and played with the take a long thomas set "she" brought him (he still firmly believes she brought it, lol!). He didn't even glance at DD, lol but the grandparents were glad to have her a few min and DS was glad to see me! DN is 3 and just had a baby brother (2 days after his 3rd b-day) and he has held him endlessly, kisses him etc. Totally foreign to me but whatever!

[citymama]

Yes, the day after DD2 was born. I think it was very important to her and to us. Her grandmas brought her - it was truly precious.

[jenstring95]

Yes, every day. DS had just turned 2 when DD was born. I had a C-section and was in the hospital for 3 nights. Our hospital has sibling cakes, so we had a little party in the room for DS. For some reason, it was also very important to me that we all went home together. DH picked up DS the day I got released. I wanted to make sure DS felt included in the homecoming. He actually sat in the wheelchair next to me as they wheeled me out of the hospital, and then he took his baby sister on a tour of the house when we got home. :)

[ett]

Yes, but DS1 was already 3.5 and it was only a short period of time on one day.

[DietCokeLover]

Yes, DD came to see me both days I was in the hospital with DS. She was only 11 months old at the time and she only stayed for about an hour each time.

[kerridean]

Yes, and she really stressed me out. She was 22 months old and was like a mini tornado in the room. She tried to press the nurse button, messed with the equipment, cried, and was generally bored and difficult. She was trying to crawl all over me in the bed post C-section. Ouch!!!! I told DH to take her home and get a sitter for the next day so he could visit.

It sounds so mean, but I just could not take the stress of her being in the room. It was much better then next day when DH came alone and we could concentrate on the new baby. I feel bad about it now, but it was how I felt at the time.

[kijip]

Yes. But he was 5 and 1/2 so old enough to not be a ruckus maker, able to appreciate the situation. A young tot would only work for a little bit, with an adult there just to watch him.

[HannaAddict]

Yes, and my first born was about the same age as yours will be. I had ordered cookies and milk shake I think from room service for him. He came in, was sweet but we kept it fairly short with dad and uncle there to hang out too. He cried a bit on the way home, but now loves looking at the pictures of him in the hospital with baby sister. He also came with my husband to pick us up and take us home with his new baby sister. I would totally do it.

[mom2MandC]

Unfortunately DD1 wasn't allowed in the hospital while I had DD2 due to hospital policy during flu season (which was very disappointing).
DD1 was 21 months old and it was hard to be away from her for that long (I had a csection so I was there 4 nights)- then come home with her new baby sister. She was happy to receive a present from her new sis upon our arrival home.
Although she is so attached to me, so I could see how her leaving at the end of their visit could have been a big problem. I guess it depends on how you think going home at the end of your visit would go.
Good Luck!!!

[lhafer]

Yes. But he was 5 and 1/2 so old enough to not be a ruckus maker, able to appreciate the situation. A young tot would only work for a little bit, with an adult there just to watch him.

This is it for me too, except my daughter was 4 (well, 3 weeks shy of her 4th birthday). My DH brought her and my mom for about an hour. It was very nice. She was SO excited about the baby (and she still is 8 months later). This is her meeting her baby sister for the first time: