Birthday Gift Question

[Cuckoomamma]

A friend was chatting with me about an upcoming bday party her daughter was invited to attend (7 yo) and said that instead of a gift, they made a donation to a charity in the bday girl's name. She felt that the family would be grateful not to have another piece of plastic around the house. The charity sounded wonderful, but I couldn't help thinking that my girls would be a little disappointed if one of the girls who attended their party just gave a donation in their name. Sure, I would talk it up really well and I know that they'd think it was a wonderful thing, but I also think they'd be missing that "hunk of plastic", lol.

Just wondering what you all think. We've been to parties where the guests were asked to make a donation in lieu of bringing a gift, but that's a little different, imo.

[Melaine]

That isn't appropriate for a child's gift, IMO. A party is not about your personal charities, philosophies or environmental beliefs, it's about celebrating the child.

[SnuggleBuggles]

It isn't really my style. I am happy to donate to charity as a family. I am really just not a fan of dictating presents; I'll give suggestions if asked but that's it. I prefer to keep birthday parties small so that the influx of stuff is minimal. I chose not to host a b-day party with ds2's classmates because we didn't need more stuff. I plan to, instead, host a playdate sometime where everyone can socialize, I can host and there is no expectation of gifts. That's how I handle the "stuff" issue.

eta I know kids that age that ask for this sort of gift though and that is different, imo. If they really feel strongly about a charity then it could be considered. I, as a parent, would still buy my b-day kid presents.

Beth

[crl]

I would not do that unless specifically requested, especially for a child.

Catherine

[brittone2]

In my circle of friends, it isn't uncommon for people to do no gifts parties or once in a while a donation to a charity. However, I would not skip a gift and provide a donation instead unless the host specifically requested that for their DC.

[Ceepa]

So this friend chose a charity herself and donated in the name of the birthday child? It's misdirected to think that supporting a favorite charity is the same as honoring a child on her birthday.

[sste]

I wouldn't do just a cash donation. But, I think it would be great to do one of those "Adopt A X" charities where the child gets a small stuffed animal or other little fun/educational things and in some of them a follow-up mailing about their adoptee. I have seen this done well at certain zoos and animal rehabilitation centers and I think it would be both a really fun gift and a nice donation.

[WolfpackMom]

However, I would not skip a gift and provide a donation instead unless the host specifically requested that for their DC.

:yeahthat:
Although the idea of adopting an animal at the zoo or something with stuffed animal is a very cool idea - that still includes somethign tangible for the child which makes more sense than just donating and telling a kid thats their gift. While thoughtful, if its not requested by the family, I think most kids would wonder where their present is...