View Full Version : Anyone else have a hard time getting back into "the swing of things" with their DH??

02-06-2011, 09:56 PM
I can't be the only one.........................

DD2 is six months and I am still EBF, and I have pretty much no desire to be intimate with DH. It's not that I don't love DH, or find him attractive......I actually wish I wanted to have sex with him.
I just can't turn off my mommy brain and turn on the wife brain........and the fact that my body is a human vending machine right now doesn't help either.

We both know it was like this when DD1 was a baby, but it is really getting hard for DH to understand that I am not choosing to be like this. It's really hard for him, that I would rather get some extra sleep than be intimate.

Please please tell me I'm not the only one!!

02-06-2011, 10:17 PM
You're not alone - DS2 is up every two hours at night add to that DS1 gets up once or twice a night since we moved him to a toddler bed and is roaring and ready to go at 6:00 every morning. I am T.I.R.E.D. I get 30 minutes or so to myself every night and I just want to spend it in a quiet room. I'm still nursing and I'm sure that adds to it. DS1 started STTN at 15 months and I'm REALLY hoping DS2 follows in his footsteps. :hug5: It stinks but I keep reminding myself it's only temporary and will soon pass. :praying:

02-06-2011, 11:40 PM
I could have written your post except that it's "DS" instead of "DD2", right down to the age - he'll be 6 months next Sunday.
Last night we had our first night out for a nice dinner with a teenage babysitter (the 2 other times we have gone out, it was to a bar-type restaurant with a friend and my mom babysitting) and I thought it would be a prelude to something "fun", but the babysitter called to say DS was screaming, so we hurried home and then had to spend a half hour calming him down, and then I fell asleep before DH made it to bed.
We used to DTD in the morning - especially while I was pregnant - but we have gotten into a routine where DS wakes us up, DH goes and gets him and brings him into bed and then we have some family time in the morning.
Added to my lack of desire and energy, we have b.c. complications. I had to stop BCP because it was affecting my supply, I am reluctant to get Mirena, and neither of us seems to want to deal with a condom.

no, you're not alone!

02-07-2011, 05:49 PM
DD is 11 months and still sleeping in our bed. And I've rebuffed any DH advances because I would SO much rather sleep than do anything and don't have the luxury of being able to sleep until 8am on days I go to the office...

02-08-2011, 01:05 PM
This was me with DD1, it took me forever to get back into the swing of things. With DD2 it's been a little more frequent the first year because she is a better sleeper, but overall it's been better, but of course it will never be what it was prior to kids. It's still hard now because we used to reserve the early afternoons when we were off but now that DD1 has stopped napping that's been a little more non existent.

02-08-2011, 01:35 PM
I would rather get some extra sleep than be intimate.


The biggest issues for us are that Ha wakes me up twice/night still (which Jelly Bean didn't do at this stage) & Jelly Bean is giving up her nap, which was our preferred time even pre-kids. I don't want to get up at 5 a.m. or earlier, and by the time both kids are asleep, I typically go to bed within 10 minutes.

02-18-2011, 08:27 PM
Please please tell me I'm not the only one!!
You are not the only one...and now I know I am not either :applause:

02-18-2011, 08:29 PM
So not the only one...

02-18-2011, 09:28 PM
I am SO with you...

02-20-2011, 11:51 AM
You're definitely not alone. For me it didn't get better until after I stopped EBF unfortunately. Don't hesitate to talk to your dr. about it I've heard of people getting estrogen cream to help.

02-28-2011, 07:27 PM
You're not the only one. Your DH should understand that the baby needs you right now. Maybe after EBF you'll feel a little more intimate with him.