veronica
02-21-2011, 12:28 PM
update marked at end of this post in red....
I usually don't like to air our my problems but man, she just ticked me off today.
A little background, my parents are from a different country. They don't really understand a lot of the customs/traditions here but have learned a lot through the years.
I'm 24 weeks into this pregnancy. It hasn't been an easy one and it has been very emotional for me, for a lot of different reasons.
My mom just asked about a throwing me a shower. I told her that I didn't really want to plan my own shower, and with twins, it's a bit late to get this started. She said that a friend of hers had mentioned I should have a shower since we are having twins. My moms reply? "oh, I mentioned it to her a while ago but she hasn't done anything about it." It's like she is fine if it doesn't happen but doesn't want to be on the hook for it not happening, that would be my fault.
I know she doesn't know to call places, or get invites, etc. But, she could have at least asked DH. DH knows I would have loved a shower to help with all of the "twin" things we weren't planning on. but, it's so late now, I feel like I don't want to burden him (he is working on the nursery, taking care of DD and DS as much as possible, working FT and dealing with his mother, who entering the advanced stages of alzheimer's).
Then, she proceeds to say, "well, all of your friends live so far (2hrs) and they have kids, so they wouldn't come. who would come?" So, now I have to plan my own shower for my imaginary friends.
And furthermore, while DH and I could really use some help with the extra gear we would like, I would just like to have some sort of celebration of the miracle that has happened to us. We had nothing for DS and I feel horrible, especially after being told he wouldn't be born. I was just relieved to have him. But, naturally conceiving twins is pretty darn cool and I'd love to celebrate it somehow. My mom is a twin so it is so neat to have it carry in our family.
sorry for the typos but I'm so mad that my mom made me cry today!!!!
UPDATE 2/26: So DH and I talked. He has been working on it all week with my mom and some friend's help. I offered to help but he has it all covered. I'm so happy. I told him that the most important thing to me is to have my three best college friends be able to attend that day. I've had some depression issues with the pregnancy that I have only really shared with them and it would mean the world to me. It sounds like it may be in the near future as he made me do a registry online at BRU last night! DH and I find ourselves getting caught up in the fear of having twins , that a celebration will be so nice for the both of us.
bonus: we had an ultrasound yesterday and all looks great. The boys are both measuring fantastic and equal and are both thriving. Now....the stretchmarks on my belly, those are thriving too:jammin:.
Thanks guys, for cheering me up when I was down. It means more than you know :)
I usually don't like to air our my problems but man, she just ticked me off today.
A little background, my parents are from a different country. They don't really understand a lot of the customs/traditions here but have learned a lot through the years.
I'm 24 weeks into this pregnancy. It hasn't been an easy one and it has been very emotional for me, for a lot of different reasons.
My mom just asked about a throwing me a shower. I told her that I didn't really want to plan my own shower, and with twins, it's a bit late to get this started. She said that a friend of hers had mentioned I should have a shower since we are having twins. My moms reply? "oh, I mentioned it to her a while ago but she hasn't done anything about it." It's like she is fine if it doesn't happen but doesn't want to be on the hook for it not happening, that would be my fault.
I know she doesn't know to call places, or get invites, etc. But, she could have at least asked DH. DH knows I would have loved a shower to help with all of the "twin" things we weren't planning on. but, it's so late now, I feel like I don't want to burden him (he is working on the nursery, taking care of DD and DS as much as possible, working FT and dealing with his mother, who entering the advanced stages of alzheimer's).
Then, she proceeds to say, "well, all of your friends live so far (2hrs) and they have kids, so they wouldn't come. who would come?" So, now I have to plan my own shower for my imaginary friends.
And furthermore, while DH and I could really use some help with the extra gear we would like, I would just like to have some sort of celebration of the miracle that has happened to us. We had nothing for DS and I feel horrible, especially after being told he wouldn't be born. I was just relieved to have him. But, naturally conceiving twins is pretty darn cool and I'd love to celebrate it somehow. My mom is a twin so it is so neat to have it carry in our family.
sorry for the typos but I'm so mad that my mom made me cry today!!!!
UPDATE 2/26: So DH and I talked. He has been working on it all week with my mom and some friend's help. I offered to help but he has it all covered. I'm so happy. I told him that the most important thing to me is to have my three best college friends be able to attend that day. I've had some depression issues with the pregnancy that I have only really shared with them and it would mean the world to me. It sounds like it may be in the near future as he made me do a registry online at BRU last night! DH and I find ourselves getting caught up in the fear of having twins , that a celebration will be so nice for the both of us.
bonus: we had an ultrasound yesterday and all looks great. The boys are both measuring fantastic and equal and are both thriving. Now....the stretchmarks on my belly, those are thriving too:jammin:.
Thanks guys, for cheering me up when I was down. It means more than you know :)