View Full Version : UPDATE: Decision Pretty Much Made..................School readiness question...LONG
Update:
I visited our neighborhood public school grades K and 1st. Both classes had a lot of time where kids were on their own or working in a small group of peers while other kids were with the teacher for reading etc...Both classes were quiet and kids engaged in something. K has an aid that stays in ONE classroom. The other 2 K classrooms do not get an aid. No aids in 1st at all. Plus, our neighborhood school is the only school in the county with a deaf and hard of hearing program integrated into all classrooms in all grades (started by Galudet). K had 27 kids per class and 1st had 28 per class. I was impressed with what 1st was doing. I spoke to the principal about what K was doing also (already above what DS is doing in his modified K program). Principal told me to bring DS to K roundup and they would speak with him and decide if he belongs in K or 1st.
Now the private: K (the grade DS was accepted into) will be a max of 12 kids and 2 teachers. Kids will range from just turning 5 to turning 7 in K (so far we know my DS and one other student will turn 7). I got to see them doing a cooking segment. The K kids were reading the cooking instructions off the board. They were reading long sentences. They were discussing how/when something is a solid, liquid and gas etc... The class will be predominantly boys also.
A couple of extra things. Public has one 20 minute recess (and I understand that might be on the chopping block for my county). Private has recess before school, morning break, PE 5 days a week, recess after lunch, afternoon break (recess). So 5 times during the day for physical activity (which DS needs to help regulate himself).
Here is another glitch. Since DS is in a Pre-K program doing K work, he isn't doing all the K work in a normal K. So he is missing about 1/2 of what they do in K. Putting him in 1st may be a bad idea (as he would not be caught up). Plus, DH and I have really been observing DS and how he reacts/interacts with others. We realize he truly functions better with kids younger than himself. If we place him with same age peers in 1st there is a big chance that socially it will be a disaster. What I noticed at the public school was that the K kids already seemed more mature that DS.
the more we talk about it, the more we realize that putting DS in private K may be the best thing for him (even though we really would rather do public 1st, I think we realize that we will most likely be back to private in a year anyway). Decision not final yet, but we are leaning heavily towards private K.
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Some of you have seen my posts in the lounge about DS and K. He is 6. His bday is in November. Our cutoff for K is September 1st. DS is in a private Transitional K program this year with all kids who are K ready. It's a school for kids who need extra social and pragmatics support. We are not re-enrolling him in the school next year. One reason is that they do not offer FA and we cannot afford $26,000.00 tuition next year. They say he needs one more year there in K (doing K and 1st work). They will not move him to 1st b/c they say he is not ready. DS got into another private that has things in place to help SN kids (it's similar to the school he is in but more academic and less clinical). They have FA and we should bet getting something (I hope). DS has been diagnosed with ADHD and he is dealing with SPD. He is in OT. He needs speech therapy for articulation of a few letters. He may also need vision therapy (although we are waiting on that). The new private also accepted him for K. I asked for him to be reconsidered for 1st. They decided it was not an option for him there. So, here is my dilemna. Do I just go public and do 1st (b/c he is 6 now and will be 7 in November) with outside OT, speech and a social skills class? Will it be a disaster for a kid who 2 schools have said is not ready yet (even though he is age appropriate)? Do I send him to the private K (as a kid turning 7 in the fall of K--with probably most of the boys at age 6 in K at this school already)? What happens if/when he goes into public after I do this? Will this be a huge deal for him (to be the absolute oldest in a public school classroom--by at least 18 months if not more)?
I'm going to our public K to observe a 1st grade class. I guess I will be able to surmise if my DS will be able to handle it next year.
DH and I are really torn. On the one hand, DS is immature. On the other hand, I have never heard of anyone sending a child to K who will be 7 in the fall of K (even if they are immature). DS is doing the saxon math for K now and is reading (although he will not open a book--he reads trucks, signs, things off the TV etc....). I'm worried about a few things--Can DS make it in 1st in public (or will the large class be to overwhelming for him and will be not be able to do the work)? Will holding him back cause other issues if public vs. private? Public says they will put him in 1st and pull him out for reading, handwriting and to meet with the school counselor with a group of kids (social skills stuff) if there are other kids in the school who also need it.
I'm really lost if you have not already been able to tell.
egoldber
03-07-2011, 12:33 PM
You already know my opinion. :)
I'm going to our public K to observe a 1st grade class. I guess I will be able to surmise if my DS will be able to handle it next year.
But I want to comment on this. When you observe, ask to also observe a K class. Those kids are his peers, NOT the first graders. If you look at first graders in the middle of the third grading period you will say no way, no how is my kid ready for this. And you're right. He's not ready for it NOW. But he may easily be ready for it THEN. Kids learn sooooooo much in first grade. Really.
So ask to see a K class to get a better feel for what his age peers are doing now in public school.
Thanks Beth. I was going to do that also. What gets me is how can the privates make a determination that he is not ready for 1st when they are evaluating him NOW also. When we did the school visit for the school he is in (last year when he was in pre-K). They put him in the K class for the visit and then told me he would not be ready for K this year. I always felt like the filled spot they needed filled even if it wasn't a great fit, and I could not figure out why they were evaluating him with kids 1 yr older than he was. My inclination now is public (although the private he got into is wonderful-not in the top 3 or top 5 in the area. It is a specialized school. But they really want to hold him back and I'm not sure I totally agree with that at this point.
o_mom
03-07-2011, 01:27 PM
But I want to comment on this. When you observe, ask to also observe a K class. Those kids are his peers, NOT the first graders. If you look at first graders in the middle of the third grading period you will say no way, no how is my kid ready for this. And you're right. He's not ready for it NOW. But he may easily be ready for it THEN. Kids learn sooooooo much in first grade. Really.
So ask to see a K class to get a better feel for what his age peers are doing now in public school.
Yes! Look at the K class to gauge ability. Has the public school offered any kind of readiness testing? I really do think that if possible, you should put him back on track. I also really do question the motives of the two private schools that say he is not ready for 1st. Both have financial motivation to have him in K.
While the second one may offer FA now, what kind of guarantee are they giving you? Will they offer the same amount of aid for gr 1+? Will the $ amount stay the same or will it increase with tuition increases? How much outside, focused therapy can you get with the amount the private school will cost (which can be paid for with FSA/HSA pre-tax money, possibly)?
infocrazy
03-07-2011, 01:28 PM
But I want to comment on this. When you observe, ask to also observe a K class. Those kids are his peers, NOT the first graders. If you look at first graders in the middle of the third grading period you will say no way, no how is my kid ready for this. And you're right. He's not ready for it NOW. But he may easily be ready for it THEN. Kids learn sooooooo much in first grade. Really.
So ask to see a K class to get a better feel for what his age peers are doing now in public school.
REALLY good point. DS1 is 5, he will turn 6 at the end of July and he is currently in K. I would probably give the public school a chance with 1st grade. I would be more concerned about the age difference in later years of school.
I want to know what it is they are doing in their first grades that they are sure he is not ready for? Have you checked the cirriculum differences or talked to moms with kids in the program. IIRC, my son sounds very similar to yours. He is not diagnosed SPD, but I feel he has a few sensory issues. He gets OT and speech and is actually being evaluated for auditory processing - his articulation has improved but I feel he has an underlying issue with speech/language/listening that is not being addressed (well, it's being addressed but I need it in his IEP). His OT says his fine motor issues effect reading/learning due to having more difficulty scanning a page and keeping on track, etc. His birthday is 8/2004 and is currently 6 and in first grade. Our cut-off is 12/1 and he started on time. I have a hard time imaging how holding him back would have helped him. I mean, I understand he is developmentally behind and somethings would have been easier to learn if he had waited a year. But it is not as if EVERYTHING is going to eventually catch up to a certain level and be easy for him. It is a constant work in progress.
I would be concerned about what the private schools expectations are. I think they need to make adjustments to his level, not that he has to wait until he catches up. Will they want to hold him back another year if he isn't up to their standards?
I know the larger class size is a concern, but if he has ADHD he can get accommodations in his IEP. Does public offer speech and OT in your area? What is your general feeling of this public, do you know a lot about it?
I know it is so hard going through all of this. We just want the best for our kids and it is not easy to work within the system and then have the pressure of making the best decision for them.
:grouphug:
o_mom
03-07-2011, 01:49 PM
I have a hard time imaging how holding him back would have helped him. I mean, I understand he is developmentally behind and somethings would have been easier to learn if he had waited a year. But it is not as if EVERYTHING is going to eventually catch up to a certain level and be easy for him. It is a constant work in progress.
I would be concerned about what the private schools expectations are. I think they need to make adjustments to his level, not that he has to wait until he catches up. Will they want to hold him back another year if he isn't up to their standards?
This brings up something that has been bothering me about the whole situation. To me, the goal of therapy/therapeutic placement should be to catch him up to his peers. They seem to be taking almost the 'easy' way out of just letting him stay behind. If he were within a month or two of the cutoff and could go either way, I think that would be one thing, but to be 6-9 months older than the other kids should not be a consideration unless they have very specific, objective measures that show he is globally delayed by that much AND that he cannot catch up even with support and therapy. I cannot understand a school saying that their goal is to bring him up to a level a year below his age.
mikeys_mom
03-07-2011, 01:55 PM
If you look at first graders in the middle of the third grading period you will say no way, no how is my kid ready for this. And you're right. He's not ready for it NOW. But he may easily be ready for it THEN. Kids learn sooooooo much in first grade. Really.
This was so true for my DS. He is currently in grade 1. He has a late September birthday and our cut-off is Dec. 31st. It is very rare to hold kids back here so it was never really a debate for me. However, he is really immature and his teacher last year at the end of SK told us that he will have a tough time adjusting in grade 1 but not to worry, he'd be fine in the end.
Even at the orientation at the beginning of this year, I could not see DS doing the things they were listing off. Well, by parent teacher interviews this past December, DS's teachers both remarked how much he had matured and grown emotionally since he started grade 1. It was a huge change that DH and I noticed at home as well.
Good luck. Sounds like a tough decision.
pinkmomagain
03-07-2011, 01:56 PM
I agree with Beth, Kindy is the important class to observe in my mind to assess how/what his peers are doing.
Honestly, I just don't get holding him back again. If you put him in public first grade next year and things are not going well in the mainstream classroom, then I would think he would best be accommodated in a Sp Ed Kindy in the public school...they probably have at least kindy section with a Sp Ed teacher/coteaching/assistant teacher. Or maybe they would keep him in the mainstream classroom and have an aide to shadow him (which would be great to help with social/pragmatics)....of course if a dx/iep warranted it.
This brings up something that has been bothering me about the whole situation. To me, the goal of therapy/therapeutic placement should be to catch him up to his peers. They seem to be taking almost the 'easy' way out of just letting him stay behind. If he were within a month or two of the cutoff and could go either way, I think that would be one thing, but to be 6-9 months older than the other kids should not be a consideration unless they have very specific, objective measures that show he is globally delayed by that much AND that he cannot catch up even with support and therapy. I cannot understand a school saying that their goal is to bring him up to a level a year below his age.
This is another issue I struggle with. No one has told me that my DS has global delays that would warrant this. NO ONE. OT says another year of therapy will most likely be it for him to catch up. I'm also not sure how valid the ADHD diagnosis is (done at KKI by a nurse practitioner who saw DS for 1.5 hours and did some "testing"). I sort of feel like the whole redshirting thing has gotten out of hand. I also feel like the privates sort of make it so that it's very hard to leave and go back into public (helps their bottom line that way). Then I see DS who, like I said, is immature for his age. His bday is Thanksgiving which is basically 1 week shy of 3 months over the 9/1 cutoff here. He has emotional immaturity (will go into tantrum mode at home--never at school. likes to play games instead of listening to what needs to be done--again at home and never at school). He also has friends his age and friends a year younger who he gets along with. There are also kids his age who are way ahead of him with respect to maturity.
o_mom
03-07-2011, 02:19 PM
This is another issue I struggle with. No one has told me that my DS has global delays that would warrant this. NO ONE. OT says another year of therapy will most likely be it for him to catch up. I'm also not sure how valid the ADHD diagnosis is (done at KKI by a nurse practitioner who saw DS for 1.5 hours and did some "testing"). I sort of feel like the whole redshirting thing has gotten out of hand. I also feel like the privates sort of make it so that it's very hard to leave and go back into public (helps their bottom line that way). Then I see DS who, like I said, is immature for his age. His bday is Thanksgiving which is basically 1 week shy of 3 months over the 9/1 cutoff here. He has emotional immaturity (will go into tantrum mode at home--never at school. likes to play games instead of listening to what needs to be done--again at home and never at school). He also has friends his age and friends a year younger who he gets along with. There are also kids his age who are way ahead of him with respect to maturity.
I do think that you shouldn't discount the benefit of peer models in helping him mature in those areas he lags. I said before in the other thread that my DS who is on the older side of the age range in 1st tends to drift down to the lowest allowed level of behavior. That means that behavior I think he should be beyond is allowed because he has kids 12 months younger in the class with him - the teachers don't want to have a double-standard of letting the younger kids do something that the older ones can't (ETA: which I understand and we deal with it because that's the way the birthdays fall :)). Being with kids who are older and more mature gives him good models to follow and we see much better behavior and choices. It sometimes makes me wish his birthday was a few weeks earlier.
Putting your DS in a K class may just give him a pass on his behavior and not give him a good model of the level he should be at. And FWIW, my DS1 stil has tantrums at home and tries to get out of work by goofing off and being silly (he does this at school, even) and he is over a year older than your DS. That your DS doesn't show these at school is a good sign, IMO.
Pepper
03-07-2011, 02:23 PM
We haven't been through this just yet (DS1 is almost 5), so you can take my advice with a grain of salt (or the whole shaker) :-). After reading through this thread, it seems like public 1st is a good option . If you don't have to pay private tuition, presumably you will have extra $$ to cover any additional private therapy for the year.
I think it's odd that the private schools are tellingyou to hold him back again, too. FWIW, we're in the public preschool, which I've been very happy with. DS1 doesn't have a full "diagnosis" yet but he's SPD (we do private OT), impulsive, hyperactive and probably ADD as well. He currently gets speech, play therapy, and an OT consult at school, and we have a behaviorist who comes to visit at home every other week. At our last IEP meeting, I asked what the kindergarten classes were like and how they thought DS1 would do? They told me that he'll be in the behavioral management class, which is very small - 6 kids, 1 teacher and 2 aides. Hopefully he'll progress enough that he can be in a regular 1st grade classroom.
I know our district does a lot of placement testing for kids when they start K, I think the first few days of school are spent on figuring out where they're at. I think DS1 is smart enough, but his behavior really gets in the way of his ability to participate in a class. His preschool teacher has a dual certification in special ed; after the last IEP she pulled me aside and told me that I shouldn't worry - she's seen lots of kids who had much bigger behavioral challenges than DS1, and they all got it together by 1st grade. (Whcih made me feel a lot better!).
Anyway, my point is saying all of this, is that no one has even suggested that I should keep DS1 back in preschool for another year. Maybe it's because our district has the $$ to pay for services, or maybe it's because DS1 is at the extreme end of the scale! Anyway, if your public school is willing to give your DS the services he needs, I think it's worth trying them out. If things aren't working for him you can make a case for new/additional services.
HTH
This brings up something that has been bothering me about the whole situation. To me, the goal of therapy/therapeutic placement should be to catch him up to his peers. They seem to be taking almost the 'easy' way out of just letting him stay behind. If he were within a month or two of the cutoff and could go either way, I think that would be one thing, but to be 6-9 months older than the other kids should not be a consideration unless they have very specific, objective measures that show he is globally delayed by that much AND that he cannot catch up even with support and therapy. I cannot understand a school saying that their goal is to bring him up to a level a year below his age.
I agree with this.
To me, the question of whether or not it would benefit a child to be held back depends on whether the child has a delay or a disorder.
If the child has a delay, that means that the child is following normal development, just at a slower pace. The delayed child can benefit from some extra services to help him/her get through a particularly troublesome phase, but overall the child is expected to catch up to his/her peers with minimal extra help. This is the child who can do really well with an extra year.
However, the child has a disorder, that means that he/she is following a different developmental path. Extra time is not going to change that path; more serious intervention is needed. That could mean special services, cognative behavioral therapy, medication, diet changes, special educational techniques, or a combination of these. The goal of these interventions should be to allow the child to function in an environment with his/her peers, not with children who are markedly younger.
Since there is no evidence of global delay and there is evidence of a disorder, I think you should give serious thought to placing your child in an age-appropriate classroom.
mytwosons
03-09-2011, 04:08 PM
There is no way I would hold him back again.
I really like how our district presented school readiness. They gave parents a list of skills kids should be working on over the summer and then told the parents not to worry if their child couldn't do something by the end of summer. The school would work with the kids, meet them where they were at and provide appropriate supports.
I think you should place him in public 1st and then make sure the school provides him with the supports he needs.
I don't think it will be a big deal for him to be one year older than a lot of kids. But, if he is 9 in second grade, I can imagine other kids remarking on it. One of DS's friends has ADHD and is very immature. He was held back one year and some of the kids in his class have remarked upon his age and behavior. (e.g. He is older than us. Why doesn't he know better?) There are other kids in the class w/similar behaviors but they seem to fly under the radar of the other kids because they aren't older.
elliput
03-09-2011, 06:27 PM
However, the child has a disorder, that means that he/she is following a different developmental path. Extra time is not going to change that path; more serious intervention is needed. That could mean special services, cognative behavioral therapy, medication, diet changes, special educational techniques, or a combination of these. The goal of these interventions should be to allow the child to function in an environment with his/her peers, not with children who are markedly younger.
Since there is no evidence of global delay and there is evidence of a disorder, I think you should give serious thought to placing your child in an age-appropriate classroom.
:yeahthat: From my own experience- DD is very immature compared to her peers, however, she is also very intelligent (knew all of the K sight words and 80% of the 1st grade sight words before the fall parent/teacher conference). Holding her back due to social immaturity would have been a huge disservice to her. IMO, she needs to have age appropriate behavior modeled so that she can learn it. It does take longer for her to internalize the behaviors, but once she has it down, she uses it.
My issue is that DS is immature AND his processing speed is slow AND he refuses to read (he can but he refuses to open a book for anyone). Plus, he still gets his days of the week mixed up (months mixed up) etc... Add to that he forgot the site words he knew. He forgot literally forgot the in at and words such as those. I would get him tutoring over the summer b/c no way could he make it if I didn't. I'm really on the fence still. I'm waiting for the public school to call me back with a date I can go and observe (hopefully next week). I will call again tomorrow about it.
pinkmomagain
03-09-2011, 09:12 PM
My issue is that DS is immature AND his processing speed is slow AND he refuses to read (he can but he refuses to open a book for anyone). Plus, he still gets his days of the week mixed up (months mixed up) etc... Add to that he forgot the site words he knew. He forgot literally forgot the in at and words such as those. I would get him tutoring over the summer b/c no way could he make it if I didn't. I'm really on the fence still. I'm waiting for the public school to call me back with a date I can go and observe (hopefully next week). I will call again tomorrow about it.
I wonder if anyone has given you any feedback about whether or not some of his academic performance issues are anxiety-based? In other words, are his recall problems (and refusal to read) due to being anxious? I'm not at all professional and don't know how strong a possibility it could be, but when my dd2 was younger she had alot of recall issues, conversational/social issues, had a hard time with novel (new) tasks....and as we went through it with her (and looking back) it really all seems to have been anxiety-based. She still has some issues with this...
We are seeing a therapist in a few weeks about anxiety issues that DS has. I will definitely ask if the slow processing et al could be linked to anxiety.
KrisM
03-09-2011, 10:19 PM
I don't have a lot to add, but I will say my DS throws tantrums at home still. He cries at a lot of things. He doesn't do any of that at school. In kindergarten, he learned to read, but wouldn't. Now in 1st, he reads almost every day by choice. I'm not sure he's a lot different than your son in a lot of ways and he is doing fine at 1st grade.
traciann
03-09-2011, 11:48 PM
Other than observing a classroom, have you met with the public school to discuss your son's situation? Do they have any suggestions on the best fit for him?
My issue is that DS is immature AND his processing speed is slow AND he refuses to read (he can but he refuses to open a book for anyone). Plus, he still gets his days of the week mixed up (months mixed up) etc... Add to that he forgot the site words he knew. He forgot literally forgot the in at and words such as those.
These are clearly signs of a disorder rather than a delay. I don't mean to be harsh, but this is not typical development. I think you need to have a serious discussion with the public school about what services would be available to your DS to help with these difficulties.
I think you really need to address the fact that he can read, but refuses to read books. You need to figure out the underlying cause. I'm brainstorming, but here a couple ideas that struck me:
You mentioned vision therapy may be needed. Could he be experiencing visual difficulties when reading? If reading causes him eyestrain or headache, it will not be an enjoyable activity.
Could he have a specific learning disorder, such as dyslexia?
The class he is in now...can the other students read? Do they read books? Is it possible that his reluctance to read to due (in part) to being in a class with non-readers? Do you think that if he were in a class of kids who read, he might feel more willing to read books?
I don't know if any of those possibilities fit your situation, but maybe they are something to think about.
The vision thing is on my mind. The OT is pushing it. WEI says to wait a year (that was several months ago). DS is just now getting really good at telling me that he is angry etc... (he would not before). My next thing is to ask him if his eyes or head hurts when he tries to read.
His class is not reading books, which is also part of the issue. Some of the kids are further behind. They do site words, copying etc... but he is not in a reading group etc... This is one reason he is not going back to this school next year. I feel like they have lumped him in with these kids and for reading he should have been with the K class. He can read. He reads at home (everyone but books--signs, food you name it).
I have no idea if he has dyslexia. However, when reading with me or DH he doesn't seem to transpose letters (I don't know what the other signs of it are though).
I'm still waiting for the public school to call me for a time to come in. One thing I'm going to ask is to have DS assessed to see if they think 1st is a good idea. That should bring out areas they feel he needs extra help and then we can go from there with the IEP (I hope).
egoldber
03-10-2011, 01:17 PM
Heather, I know you hear all the time that kids are reading in K in MoCo. But I can PROMISE you, that not all kids in K are reading. MANY MANY kids enter first grade reading not at all or reading only very simple BOB type books. A BOB book is on grade level for end of K and beginning of first.
On grade level for END of first grade reading in FCPS is simple books like Mr. Putter and Tabby or Henry and Mudge. Children who receive the MOST support in public school are kids who are below reading level.
infocrazy
03-10-2011, 01:48 PM
I sort of feel like the whole redshirting thing has gotten out of hand. Then I see DS who, like I said, is immature for his age. He has emotional immaturity (will go into tantrum mode at home--never at school. likes to play games instead of listening to what needs to be done--again at home and never at school)
My issue is that DS is immature AND his processing speed is slow AND he refuses to read (he can but he refuses to open a book for anyone). Plus, he still gets his days of the week mixed up (months mixed up) etc... Add to that he forgot the site words he knew. He forgot literally forgot the in at and words such as those.
My DS1 actually sounds a little similar. He doesn't really tantrum at home, but he definitely will cry over things he has no reason to cry about-drives me crazy! He doesn't at school. Listening is not his strong point anywhere. He definitely wants to play games instead of homework...but really I would rather be on here than working so I don't think that is that big of a deal or a surprise.
My DS doesn't really enjoy reading yet, but he can. We started doing a few things to help. He has a sticker chart now for homework (I give him extra to practice writing and cutting etc) and if he does homework without a fit, he gets a sticker. Once he gets 5 stickers, he gets to choose a new book. I have some next level reading books for him. DS2 is trying to teach himself to read. He will read some of the level 1 Bob books and ask DS1 for help. This puts DS1 in more of a teacher role and he LOVES to "help" DS2 read...but really he ends up reading most of the book. TJ also has letter cookies. I give him 5-7 and tell he needs to make X number of words with them before he can eat them. After he does, I spin through as many as I can make for him to read, then he gets to eat them. We also do this with the numbers in there for number recognition. I honestly think this is how he learned to "read" thousands in numbers. We will eventually use these for Math.
DS1 also thinks that getting things wrong is funny...it is not. But that is what happens sometimes when he "forgets" sight words or other stuff. So.not.funny. He has to recite the days of the week to get what tomorrow is, and I would be surprised if he knew all the months. He knows it is March and his birthday is in July.
I will say that he is probably one of the younger maturity level in his class but he is also one of the younger age kids (will be 6 in July). His teacher is not a great fit to say the least and needs to retire. She doesn't really handle the boys very well. I think she thinks that he has some attention issues, but I (and my aunt who was a teacher/principal) think it is more a maturity issue. ETA: About the redshirting, I totally agree. I think part of DS1's problem is that his teacher is comparing him to his classmates, who are much older. I was very surprised to see one girl's hand writing/drawings etc. It was WAY above DS1's level. Yesterday, he told me she is 7 so that explains quite a bit.
He is currently in K and will be in public 1st grade next year. Hope that helps.
Will this be a huge deal for him (to be the absolute oldest in a public school classroom--by at least 18 months if not more)?
I think the age gap might be challenging, not necessarily now but in a few years when they're in middle school and he's hitting puberty a full year or two ahead of all the other kids. My niece experienced precocious puberty (I believe she was 9 when she got her period) and she also had a very difficult time socially, which I can't help but suspect was exacerbated by the fact that she was already wearing a bra and dealing with pads while most of the other girls in her class were still nowhere near that stage. Granted the issues are a bit different for boys, but I do think it's something to consider, and at least weigh.
Are there any schools in your area that do mixed grades? No idea if this is still a thing, but the elementary school I went to in the 80s had mixed K/1, 1/2, 2/3, etc grades for kids who maybe weren't quite ready either socially or academically for the next grade up, but weren't necessarily at the point where they needed to fully repeat a grade (or, on the flip side, younger kids who were ready for a bit more of an academic challenge but weren't necessarily ready to skip a grade). I was in a mixed 4/5 classroom, and wasn't particularly aware of the logistics from an adult perspective but remember that year fondly.
I figured as much. My own brother didn't read a stich until second grade (in MOCO). I got the call and have an appt to see our public on Tuesday morning. I'm going to be with the principal (wish it was the assistant principal as she is a much much nicer person to deal with). Anyway, I'm getting the "tour" of the classes. What I want is to sit in on one for 15 minutes each (don't know if they will allow me to or not).
Update after visit to public and private options.
SnuggleBuggles
03-20-2011, 10:32 PM
The private school sounds great in a lot of ways. I would just keep advocating for him to go onto 1st grade instead.
GL!Beth
What they told me was that if DS was advanced in any subject (mainly math or reading now) he would be put into a group that fit his needs. Plus, if they feel at any point during the year that he needs to be moved to 1st, they will do it. I'm ok with this.
Pepper
03-21-2011, 09:03 PM
Wow! The visits were really helpful,eh? So glad that you have much more clarity now about the options :thumbsup:
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