We might be having a...

[fedoragirl]

...BOY! And for some reason, this terrifies me. When I was pregnant with DD, we longed for a girl, and we got our wish. I always envisioned myself as a mother of a girl...dunno why. Also, DD has been a very, very easy baby, and laid-back toddler now. So now I am terrified that I'll get a holy terror and won't know how to handle a boy, etc. My own childhood experience with my only brother isn't that positive. My mom dotes on him, and he always seemed to get the lion's share of her affection. Even today, they are closer than ever--which is good for them. I guess I always resented that and knew that he was getting attention because he was a boy--which is culturally true where we originally come from.
Is there anything I need to do or know before we emark on yet another adventure?
FYI: I am only 12 weeks, but the OB who saw me for DD also predicted her gender at early screening, and he was right. He did say he has been right 99% of the time.

[logan's mom]

I have an 18 month old son and he has been such an easy baby. Always very happy and content. Not the greatest sleeper but that's probably more my fault anyway! He is such a snuggler! I love it! Just use your experience to help you treat both of your children as fairly and equally as possible. I really feel like laid-back moms have laid-back kids! Congrats!

[swissair81]

My son is the easiest of my children. My holy terror is a very girly-girl.

[janine]

...BOY! And for some reason, this terrifies me. When I was pregnant with DD, we longed for a girl, and we got our wish. I always envisioned myself as a mother of a girl...dunno why. Also, DD has been a very, very easy baby, and laid-back toddler now. So now I am terrified that I'll get a holy terror and won't know how to handle a boy, etc. My own childhood experience with my only brother isn't that positive. My mom dotes on him, and he always seemed to get the lion's share of her affection. Even today, they are closer than ever--which is good for them. I guess I always resented that and knew that he was getting attention because he was a boy--which is culturally true where we originally come from.
Is there anything I need to do or know before we emark on yet another adventure?
FYI: I am only 12 weeks, but the OB who saw me for DD also predicted her gender at early screening, and he was right. He did say he has been right 99% of the time.

Congratulations! I can understand what you are saying..I have a DD who is the same as yours and sometimes wonder how I'd handle a boy (what if he is a holy terror like you say?). I guess the same could be for a DD #2 though and how wonderful to be having one of each. I hear what you are saying about your own experience with your brother (my mother's culture also values boys..she keeps telling me how her friends who had grandsons are ESTATIC) but things are different now, even in traditional cultures. Girls are now considered of equal "value" due to societal shifts which is a great thing for our little girls. Congrats again, is your husband happy?

[vonfirmath]

...BOY! And for some reason, this terrifies me. When I was pregnant with DD, we longed for a girl, and we got our wish. I always envisioned myself as a mother of a girl...dunno why. Also, DD has been a very, very easy baby, and laid-back toddler now.

my boy is very easy-going and laid-back. That is more a personality of the child than a sex-based criteria :)

My friends have three children -- girl, boy, girl. Mom and dad are laid back. 1st and 2nd are laid back. The third is dominant. She was leader from 2 minutes out of the womb. She's 15 and very sweet now -- but its been a rough row to hoe for the family.

[YouAreTheFocus]

I have an 18 month old son and he has been such an easy baby. Always very happy and content. Not the greatest sleeper but that's probably more my fault anyway! He is such a snuggler! I love it! Just use your experience to help you treat both of your children as fairly and equally as possible. I really feel like laid-back moms have laid-back kids! Congrats!

:yeahthat:

I have a 17 mo old son, and from birth he has been the easiest, most laid back baby I've ever met! Always happy--smiling, laughing, and clapping at everything. Loves giving hugs and blowing kisses. I don't think we have done anything differently (yet, at least) than we would have if he had been a girl.

[indigo99]

My boyfriend in highschool had this horrible terror of a kitten who would hide and then attack your legs, clawing and biting. The poor thing wasn't born that way, but the two teenagers in the house would play rough with him and taught him to be aggressive like that. I think that sometimes little boys get treated differently and learn to play more rough than girls.

I don't believe that boys have to be more likely to be a holy terror though. My little brother was always very sweet and loved playing dress up and wanted to grow up to be a princess. My own son really hasn't shown any behaviors that I'd call typically boy so far. It's more about the individual personality, and I think that you'll be pleasantly surprised at how much you'll love having a boy.

So was this an ultrasound at 12 weeks when the OB guessed boy or...?? I'm really, really anxious to know what I'm having, and I have my 12 week ultrasound next week.

[BabbyO]

Wow, I'm in the exact same and opposite position. I'm also 12 weeks (congrats to you!) and while I haven't had any early predictions...I'm TERRIFIED that this baby is a GIRL. My 20 mo old DS is such a dear and the easiest baby/toddler ever. He even sat still for a full hair cut last night...the stylist said he's by far one of the best she's ever had.

I think its normal once you have one to be scared of the other gender...as for holy terrors...I'm pretty sure its an even 50/50 split for boys and girls!

Good luck...I'm sure you will have a wonderful child...boy or girl! :)

[boolady]

Well, I'm not expecting anything, but my two godsons are the most laid back, easygoing children in the world. I really don't think you can take the gender stereotypes to heart.

[plusbellelavie]

Congratulations! I completely understand because it was somewhat like that for me growing up...I had 5 brothers and they got a lot of attention or what I saw as "free passes" for just being boys especially my younger brother who was the "baby" of the family. But, I believe that since you experienced it that you will make an effort not to have it happen in your family between your kids. KWIM?

Plus boy or girl you will be surprised how different their personality will be!

DS1 was the most laid back happy baby and still is pretty much!

DD had more of a stubborn attitude not necessarily a difficult baby just knew what she wanted!

DS2 is a combination I would say...more easy going...happy going lucky kind of kid but boy when he wants something he lets you know it!

Enjoy the adventure!

[eh613c]

Congratulations! I think you need to embrace the difference between your DD and DS. My first was a boy and he has been really easy. I'm currently 30 weeks pregnant (with another boy)and I can feel the difference. This second one is more of a nightowl and more active! No 2 kids will ever be the same and that's what is so special about each of them.

As for your brother getting more attention than you, this is your chance to make things right and give equal attention to your kids.

[fedoragirl]

I know that you are all right. I just fear that I may "ignore" future DS' needs or wants because I think he's a boy. KWIM? I also felt my brother got to do a lot of things because he was a boy and that was the explanation handed to me. Anyway, I definitely can make sure things are equal between my children. I just don't want to be heavy handed with one and easygoing with the other.
Thank you for your good wishes. I actually went in for early screening to test for down's syndrome etc. I did it for my last pregnancy too. It's routinely offered to all moms but especially to moms of "advanced maternal age." Ha! The OB is very experienced and he predicted DD's gender and was right. He did tell me not to pin my expectations on his word, but I know he's right because my pregnancy so far, has been the complete opposite of the last one.
All the best to the expectant moms!

[KpbS]

Boys are wonderfully fun! Really, truly. Before kids, I always pictured myself as a mom to 1 or 2 girls. Surprise! I now have 3: boy, boy, girl and I love being a "boy" mom. Don't let your family dynamics from your family of origin dictate your family's future. I love the old saying comparing not being able to chose which child you love best to which hand (right or left) you love most. You love them both the same.

[Momof3Labs]

I had a handful of a boy, and the easiest boy on earth (as babies, at least).

My SIL has two girls - one a handful as a baby, one easy-peasy.

It has nothing to do with gender.

[Uno-Mom]

I'm super-curious. What signs did they look at to identify sex at 12 weeks??

About your concerns: seems like you are very aware and thoughful. You sound like a person who will avoid those pitfalls you fear just by being intentional about your parenting.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I understand because after ds1 I couldn't imagine having a girl! Girl world scares me still! I understand boy world and it's pretty awesome! You'll be a great boy mom. Boys are a ton of fun and you can parent different than your parents.

Beth

[fedoragirl]

[QUOTE=Uno-Mom;3067820]I'm super-curious. What signs did they look at to identify sex at 12 weeks??
I have NO clue. He says he just knows but I think he doesn't want to give out details of every body part in case he is wrong. It's mainly to check if the baby shows signs of chromosome issues like down's etc.

[fedoragirl]

Thank you all for your confidence in me--it certainly bolsters mine. Now I have to navigate the boy world of clothes and I just can't find anything I like. Why does everything have sayings or dinosaurs or sports themed stuff all over boy clothes? Arrghh!

[swissair81]

Thank you all for your confidence in me--it certainly bolsters mine. Now I have to navigate the boy world of clothes and I just can't find anything I like. Why does everything have sayings or dinosaurs or sports themed stuff all over boy clothes? Arrghh!

I dislike all that stuff. I have had luck with selected clothes from J & J, Gymboree, Baby Boden, and Baby Gap. Also some Old Navy. I am very conservative in my clothing choices. I won't let my son wear any characters, guitars, dinosaurs, sports, skulls, or strange sayings. I might have more criteria that I just forgot about, but I am quite selective. Ebay is often a great resource. The NWT stuff especially. I am keeping all my boy baby stuff to use again. It will probably be just my luck that my next boy will be born in a completely different season.

[Minnifer]

This thread is very timely for me as I'm feeling the same way - kind of petrified of having a boy! All of my friends with boys the same age as my DD have holy terrors, and when we get together, they spend their time racing around, crashing into things or falling, making loud noises, etc - you get the picture.


Now I have to navigate the boy world of clothes and I just can't find anything I like. Why does everything have sayings or dinosaurs or sports themed stuff all over boy clothes? Arrghh!

And, as silly as it sounds, this part has been almost the hardest for me. It makes me really sad not to be excited about all the little outfits for DS, the way I've been (and still am) for DD. Not to mention all the adorable clothes that were barely worn and now won't get reused (it's unlikely I'll have another after this).

And then I feel guilty too b/c I know none of this *really* matters and that I will be very lucky to (hopefully - knock wood) have 2 healthy children...

[cindys]

I love having boys!! Sure, I would have liked a little girl but I just decided that all the girly stuff I would just have to buy for my nieces :)

And there are TONS of cute little boys clothes that arent all dinosuars, sports etc etc...

I do have to say that to me there is nothing cuter than a little boy in jeans and a baseball cap...

And yes, boys have alot of energy but I will take that over hormonal teenage girls! My sister has 3 girls and 1 boy...All teenagers...the girls make her insane!

Cindy
Mama to 3 boys...19, 4 & 2 :heartbeat::heartbeat::heartbeat: