Daycare: When you call me at work and say "No need to worry, but..."

[wendibird22]

A. I am going to worry because obviously there's something wrong or you wouldn't call me on my cell at work,
and
B. I then feel like a horrible parent the rest of the day if I let my child stay in your care the rest of the day because you did in fact tell me not to worry.

I get a call at 8am today telling me that DD2 fell and hit her head on a bookcase and has a large bruised goose egg above her eye. The director tells me she cried but has stopped, they are putting ice on it, that she appears fine, and no need to do anything, but that they always call a parent when a child injures their head. Ok fine. I appreciate that. Really I do. But then I'm sitting at work (or in this case the parking lot outside a business meeting), arguing with my inner voice about whether I'm a horrible parent for leaving my injured child at daycare and relying on them to judge whether she is acting fine or not.

Man being a WOHM bites sometimes!

[MamaSnoo]

BTDT.....I'm sorry. The only thing worse is when they do not call you.

[BabbyO]

I hear your pain. I guess I'd rather argue with my inner voice, though, than find out at the end of the day, giving me NO option to do something more if I felt it necessary.

If it makes you feel better, our sitter called me at 8:30 AM yesterday with a similar call...only it was a fender-bender they were in while DS was in the car. Thankfully she knew how to check the MA tether to see if there was damage to the seat and did that before she called. It made me feel less guilty about not leaving!

WOTH is really tough!

[deborah_r]

BTDT, too. I know the feelings you are describing. I just had them Tuesday with my 2nd grader, who has an injured foot (had x-rays, no fractures) but the doctor told me he should be fine to walk around, just no running/jumping etc. So the school nurse calls me Tuesday after he had only been there about an hour, he is saying his foot hurts. I suspected he enjoyed staying home on Monday so much (well the part of Monday we weren't in Urgent Care) that he might be milking it a little. So I told her to send him back to class and see if he came back. I felt bad about it, but also didn't feel his injury was so bad that he couldn't handle it. Monday afternoon I had to keep telling him not to run, so I figured he was exaggerating.

What I have figured out since then however, is that it hurts him more in the morning and he actually was in some pain, so I feel crappy now. It hurts until he walks around some and stretches everything out. By the afternoon he is running and jumping. So I've now been giving him Motrin in the morning before he goes to school (I think today will be the last day for that, he seems much better today).

It is so hard to decide when to go get them and when to ride it out! And of course head injuries are the scariest.

[bubbaray]

FWIW, here they are required by licensing to call the parent if the child is injured in their care. I got the same call 2w ago about DD#1.

[smiles33]

Yeah, talk about mommy guilt. But I'd feel worse/upset if I showed up to pick up DDs and saw a goose egg. I remember showing up once and seeing teeth marks (from upper and lower jaws!) on her forearm and being shocked no one had called to tell me. I had to find a teacher to ask what happened!

[twowhat?]

Yup, they're required to "let you know" but yes, BTDT with feeling like an awful parent. But you are not. Your child is fine!!!

This happened once with DD1 got a skeeter bite on her eyelid. We knew about it. But that afternoon they called to say "not to worry, but just to let you know - her eyelid is swollen almost shut." So yes, fell prey to the "bad parent" complex, skipped out on work to pick her up early and take her to the ped only to be told that there's really nothing to do other than to wait it out, and oh here's a prescription for a stronger antihistamine but you don't have to fill it out if you don't want to...all of which I really already knew so it ended up just being a waste of time. DD1, of course, was fine.

[Uno-Mom]

Same here.

My worst was a month or so ago when they called to say Sprog had been feverish but they were putting her down to nap and thought she would be ok to stay. She'd been crying and wanting mommy but was now calm.

I was home sick that day. I really needed MY rest. But talk about feeling awful, I wasn't even at work! (It turned out fine. I got the rest I needed to get better. Daycare texted me every couple hours to update that Sprog napped and her fever went down, etc.)

[tamie]

BTDT too and sending a collective hug.

I work from home and have been super busy. I could go pick them up, but I wouldn't get any work done. At the same time though, I am sitting at my desk worrying! UGH!

[wendibird22]

Glad I'm not the only one who feels mommy guilt in this type of situation. And DD2 is trouble with a T so I have a feeling this is just the first of many of these types of phone calls. Oy!