When kids DON'T seem to have stranger danger?

[rin]

Is there a diplomatic way to handle this, or do I just need to be straightforward, clear, and possibly offend?

Ever since my DD was born, we've fairly often had the experience of being out in public and meeting someone (say, a cashier, a waitress, most recently a saleslady selling some landscaping stones) who wants to hold our baby. In most cases these people seem perfectly nice and friendly (in every case it's been a woman who generally seems to want to talk about her own kids/grandkids/etc), but I'm just not comfortable with handing my daughter over to a complete stranger to snuggle.

The problem is that my daughter just doesn't seem to be aware of the stranger/non-stranger divide, and I'm pretty sure would perfectly happily go to any of these people. Most recently today, we were standing with the stone saleslady, who kept saying (to my daughter) "Do you want to come to me? Come on! Come give me a hug!" etc etc. Ok, over the top, but whatever, if it were just that I could smile and say that the baby just wanted to hang out with Mama. The real problem, though, is that my DD almost always responds to situations like this by leaning forwards and putting her arms out for the person to hold her, so I can't exactly say that the baby doesn't want to go. Does anyone have any ideas for a good response to communicate that I'm not comfortable with her going to strangers, but not make the other adult feel uncomfortable?

[s7714]

You could always pull out a line like "oh, she's just getting over a cold and we don't want to share our germs" or something along those lines. Personally I always went for a straight forward "no thank you" or "I'm not comfortable with that" response. But then I'm not the type to really care if someone is offended. :bag

[rin]

You could always pull out a line like "oh, she's just getting over a cold and we don't want to share our germs" or something along those lines. Personally I always went for a straight forward "no thank you" or "I'm not comfortable with that" response. But then I'm not the type to really care if someone is offended. :bag

Oh, that's a good one! Thanks. I never think of those lines myself. I know I'm probably worrying too much about what other people will think, and that it's probably good for people to realize that they're out of line, but I guess I'm a bit of a confrontation-weenie. :shake:

[Indianamom2]

I would likely go with something like the PP poster suggested, but I also think it's absolutely fine to be honest in this case and tell the stranger that you're trying to teach your child about not going to strangers right now. I would most certainly not be offended by that...and frankly if someone is, it's their problem.

FWIW, my DD was like that. She would (and still will) talk to anyone. She won't go to them, necessarily, and I didn't usually have people ask to hold her (Maybe I give off a vibe of "don't touch") but it worried me too.