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View Full Version : Does anyone here take really good care of...themselves?



tiapam
03-25-2011, 11:28 PM
Not sure I worded that properly. I just feel like so many posters here and people I know IRL are not. Just curious as I struggle with this. I am starting to realize part of it is my fault and I am thinking of trying some experiments, mostly with sleep. I don't get enough sleep even though my kids mostly sleep through the night. So why am I still up and on the computer? Because it's me time. But I am starting to think sleep would be a better way to use that time.

If you do take very good care of yourself, what are your secrets?

Katigre
03-25-2011, 11:35 PM
I take good care of myself. I think that I do it because I make myself part of the 'family priority' - i.e., just like DH's needs and my kids' needs matter, so do mine, because our whole family's health depends on each of us taking good care of ourselves. I get alone time and DH is with the kids, I do my hair and makeup the days I go out of the house and have flattering clothes that fit (even though they're discount from Kohl's or Old Navy). I never.ever miss showering in the morning. I'm also pretty in touch with who I am and what I need and am not shy about asking for it and making it happen.

I just feel fairly balanced in how I manage life and things like that - and I have a good community of friends/family around me which helps a lot too.

DebbieJ
03-26-2011, 12:01 AM
I do not take good care of me. Working on it. Often feels selfish, though.

tiapam
03-26-2011, 12:54 AM
I do not take good care of me. Working on it. Often feels selfish, though.

yeah i get the selfish feeling. i have been wanting to schedule a massage for forever but keep coming up with excuses for not doing it. and i am way behind on doctor appointments. for dr appts bringing the kids with me or finding childcare is such a pain as i never know how long it will take, so i sometimes need to have a second sitter to relive the first, someone to take dd to school or pick her up, etc. i get a headache just thinking about it.

elektra
03-26-2011, 02:22 AM
That would be a big fat NO.
I go to sleep between 1 and 2am, I am overweight, never exercise, do not get pedicures and rarely buy new clothing items for myself.

DietCokeLover
03-26-2011, 07:29 AM
That would be a big fat NO.
I go to sleep between 1 and 2am, I am overweight, never exercise, do not get pedicures and rarely buy new clothing items for myself.

I could have written this, except I go to bed a little earlier than you. I feel guilty focusing on myself, especially when we have so little time and financial resources.

momm
03-26-2011, 07:34 AM
No. I don't exercise, don't even take a long luxurious shower, much less anything else. I need to change that though. It's always something to be done for the baby, for the house, for DH, for, for for.
I know I sound whiny but it's just fact not a whine :)

hellokitty
03-26-2011, 08:22 AM
I'm trying to work on this. I think that when you have little kids you get sucked into a vortex and forget that you need to take care of yourself. I'm just now coming out of that trance now that my older two are less work. Trying to get healthier in general, loosing some weight, re-doing my wardrobe, trying to go out more with friends, etc.. I find that it's pretty common, where during the younger yrs (kids under age 4), moms just look haggard and kind of frumpy b/c they are pulled so many directions and the kids are so needy. When their kids start going to all day school, things start to improve for mom, since they have more time to themselves. I've run into friends that I haven't seen for a few yrs and was amazed at how good (and put together) they looked as their kids got older.

bisous
03-27-2011, 02:50 AM
In some ways yes and in some ways no. My clothes are pretty frumptastic these days owing to my bank account! I'm a little bit embarrassed at our local mall which is pretty nice. The kids don't seem to mind me though, lol.

I do make sure that I get sleep and eat well. Exercise? Well I have TIME and support to make it happen, but I don't because I don't love it. I've started walking now that the days are longer and DH is home in the evenings and I'm really enjoying that. :)

My biggest lesson this year was to take care of my stress level. Even if it means not living up to a certain expectation for myself or dropping a less than absolutely crucial but still important responsibility, I need to make sure that I have breathing room in my life or I can't function. Because I've really suffered with this in the past couple of months, I'm doing pretty well at saying no and being kind to myself right now.

lhafer
03-27-2011, 09:49 AM
That would be a big fat NO.
I go to sleep between 1 and 2am, I am overweight, never exercise, do not get pedicures and rarely buy new clothing items for myself.

This is me. Only I just started excersing 4 times a week. We have a gym membership and I wasn't taking advantage of it. At all. It is $160/mo for all of us (DH, me, DD1 and DD2), DD1 has swim lessons there which adds $40/mo - otherwise it's $120/mo.

I was just lazy. But they have a great kid center that my DD1 loves going to. They have a great play room for the baby. I just have to call and make reservations for the baby.

I do a cardio class monday mornings at 8:45am. I drop off DD1 at preschool at 8:30 and head over. I do pilates on T/Th at 8:30. Take the kids with me and they have fun. Then I do another cardio class W or Fri.

DH and I also have memberships to Massage Envy. We try to get them once a mo. But many times they will call me because I haven't been and can go get a 2 hr massage and use up my sessions. It's a $40/mo membership for each of us.

I don't get pedicures very often. Or cut my hair but like twice a year. And I never buy clothes for myself. But I am slowly changing because I realize that if I don't take better care of myself, I might not be around long enough to see my girls grow up. I decided to start the excersing first. It's the harder habit for me to get into. I just started excersing 2 weeks ago. So I'm going to do that for a 4-6 weeks and get into a good routine. Then I will begin to work on my diet. If I did it all at once, I would just get overwhelmed and frustrated, and I would quit. The other thing I don't do is I don't get on a scale. I know about how much I weight. I just want to feel better. I don't want to depend on numbers.

I am 100 pounds overweight, I already have cardiac issues, high blood pressure, and high cholesterol/triglycerides. My father dropped dead of heart attack at the age of 51 and he was healthy (that they know of). I'm 33 years old. I think I am finally growing up and realizing that I am important too.

twowhat?
03-27-2011, 09:53 AM
I do not take good care of me. Working on it. Often feels selfish, though.

Same here. Either I feel selfish or don't have the energy. I don't even put lotion on after showers anymore (yeah I know, it's AWFUL) because I just want to go to bed and it takes time to properly massage in all that lotion!! My skin has definitely suffered. Just in the past few weeks I've been forcing myself to at LEAST moisturize my face after showers. I definitely treat myself like CRAP. On the rare occassion that I cook, I always cook healthy and rarely touch any of it - I save the leftovers for DH and the girls while I go out and get Subway or something for lunch.

I'm sure this will all bite me in the butt (really, it already has as I feel - and apparently LOOK according to a co-worker - about 10 years older than I really am), but I also really don't see it changing until it gets MUCH easier to care for the kids.

The only thing I've really done for myself is to go shopping for work clothes mostly because I really needed clothes for work. I AM going to take a week-long staycation with the rest of my vacation time next month and I AM going to make an effort to go get my hair cut, massage, shopping for myself. I'll even go out and buy makeup!!

swissair81
03-27-2011, 11:40 AM
If I had any spare time for myself, I have completely blown in by being in PT for the past 4 months, and with my school work. Add Passover cleaning to that, and basically I just forget about it.

emily
03-29-2011, 08:51 AM
No, I have really let myself go after having DCs. I WOTH with a terrible commute and can't imagine getting up any earlier than I do to exercise, which is the only thing I really want to start doing again. I'm hoping we can start exercising as a family once the weather gets warmer.
Did not know that Massage Envy had memberships?? 40/mo seems so reasonable. Maybe I can start taking care of myself with a massage or two??

Green_Tea
03-29-2011, 09:23 AM
I have been taking much better care of myself since the beginning of the year. I have a (silly) goal of being at my most fabulous in terms of health when I turn 40. I am 36 now, so I have 4 years to get there :tongue5:.

I started weight watchers on January 3, and have lost 18 lbs to date. I am about 6 lbs away from my goal. I have completely changed my eating habits and have cut out almost all refined carbs and extra sugar and increased protein and fruits and veggies. I feel SO much better.

I have also been working on getting more sleep and exercise. I am doing better with the sleep part than the exercise part. But I have 4 years to figure that out ;).

One thing that has made it possible for me is an extremely supportive DH who truly splits parenting and house-related chores 50-50 (when we're both home, that is.) I refuse to feel as though I am being selfish for making choices that make me a better, healthier mother and wife. Those choices might involve exercise, getting a haircut, or even going away for a few days to see a friend without the kids. I chose my husband as my lifelong mate because I knew he'd be a terrific dad and would be 100% capable of parenting solo when necessary (just as I do and have done as a SAHM for the past 8 years). I cannot imagine feeling bad about leaving my children with their father while I recharge my batteries. And I encourage DH to do the same! The kids still get the VAST majority of my time and attention, but it's easier to feel good about that when I know that my own needs are not being (totally) neglected.

hillview
03-29-2011, 10:00 AM
Well ... I am trying.

I recently started working out with some other friends and that has helped a LOT. Really an insane amount. I am not so great a the haircuts etc but do okay in general. Sleep is a key issue for me and I am trying to get the kids to stay in bed and to get my self to bed at a good time. So maybe my answer is sort of?
/hillary