Lost a battle of will, whats the best seat for this situation?

[WolfpackMom]

MIL wants to take DS to and from play dates with his cousin. While I do want DS to play with his cousin and to spend time with MIL, she is not the most fabulous driver, and she drives an old car. DH at first was a no-go on this with me, then he changed his mind and we duked it out and I appear to have lost.

The car is a 93ish Buick, built like a tank I am told...DS currently is RF in a Britax RA50 in both or our cars. We plan to keep him rear facing to the limits of the seat (35lbs). Right now he is 14months and approximately 24-25lbs.

MIL wants to buy a seat for her car so she can do this. I will only feel comfortable if DS is rearfacing, center (unless tighter fit outboard) and in the safest seat possible. She plans to drive him 1-2 x a week, I plan for it to be once every other week because she has no free time and he in daycare part time so Im not sure when her schedule is going to really mesh with his.

I am trying not to be paranoid about her driving him in this older car, but Im feeling a bit miffed about the whole thing.

Guidance on the best seat for this please? And where to get the best price?
I am almost inclined to give her the RA50 and to put a seat with a higher RF limit in my car but I dont really want to pay for a $250 seat right now just so she can have our current one in her car and she is willing to buy one for her car (but not sure she would go for buying one to put in my car).

TIA! :bowdown:

[Joolsplus2]

I feel your mommy-pain (my mom insists on driving my kids in her '91 Explorer...)
Check out this lovely video to argue that 'built like a tank' insistence... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBDyeWofcLY (or don't, you already know which car will win, I'm sure ;))
Might consider a seat with built in lockoffs, maybe a good deal on a Roundabout 55, or a True Fit Premier (that way, if the center lapbelt install doesn't work out, then you won't have to muck with a locking clip for with the outboard non-locking seatbelts). I wonder if we can figure out how to get you a top tether in that car for when forward-facing is the only option... hmmm... I might have to research that for you.

[WolfpackMom]

Oh gosh I didn't even think of the nonlocking belts and no tethers, sigh. I should be thinking about tether solutions too because SIL and MIL plan on having DN FF in the car and she is a string bean and I know SIL is just going to aim for the cheapest seat or just use one from one of her other kids that's like 5 yrs old. They aren't big into car safety and think I'm a nut over it and just acting "too good" for them. Sigh.

[yankinweimar]

Is it ever possible to trade cars with MIL? I have a similar MIL and I have agreed that she can drive my older DD to school to "help" me(7 min ride, no highway, but lots of stoplights for her to race through:32:) in MY car with MY seat installed how I like it. She moans but she'll do it. It means that sometimes I have to take her car to work, which is annoying for me, but, in my mind, safer for DD. Just a thought.

[WolfpackMom]

Is it ever possible to trade cars with MIL? I have a similar MIL and I have agreed that she can drive my older DD to school to "help" me(7 min ride, no highway, but lots of stoplights for her to race through:32:) in MY car with MY seat installed how I like it. She moans but she'll do it. It means that sometimes I have to take her car to work, which is annoying for me, but, in my mind, safer for DD. Just a thought.

I have tried to think of a way to make that possible since I have done it before but with DN living 30 mins away and MIL 20 mins we run into snafus with trading all around while I'm trying to work. My initial thought was to have her come to get DS and take my car and leave hers and I think that may work most of the time but DH seems to think that's too complicated and may offend her ( I know it will but don't really care too much since safety is more important). It would also require installing DN's seat into our car each time and I'm worried MIL won't get a proper install for her in my car and I won't be there to do it for her. I'm not going to sacrifice her safety so DS can ride in our car when I know I can atleast put both seats in her car properly for both kids and leave them installed rather than having to take one or the other in and out.