Am I Missing something?

[HIU8]

Maybe I just don't get it. The person who does dropoff and pickup of a child at DS's school has told us about this child's outbursts before. The child is medicated. I am listening and my child has those same type of outbursts, but is not medicated. I have learned my child's triggors and have learned ways to "bring him out" of the behavior. Although it is very difficult for me at times. I'm honestly wondering several things (and I do not by any means know the full story with this other child and I do not want to know): Do outbursts where a child smacks (mine does not do this as of yet), yells "give me food now, now, now" and growls require the child being medicated (these are adhd children)? Should I be looking into meds for DS (he exhibits things at home but holds it together at school)?

[pinkmomagain]

I do not by any means know the full story with this other child and I do not want to know

I think this is key. You really don't know his whole story. Maybe his needs aren't being addressed properly, maybe they are still trying to figure out the right balance of meds, who knows.

In relation to your child, it sounds as if you are getting by OK without meds:he holds it together at school and you've done a good job figuring out strategies to help him out of outbursts.

[HIU8]

Like I said, I don't know the story and I'm not interested in the details. But, I guess I was wondering if I'm making a mistake not looking at meds for those types of behaviors. Or really, if those types of behaviors are what drives ppl to use meds for their adhd children. So, I guess what I'm curious about is at what point is a line drawn (behavior wise) where meds would start to be considered. I've gotten little guidance with respect to this, and I'm honestly not sure how much I need to allow DS's behaviors to escalate before meds are considered.

[pinkmomagain]

It's definitely a tough question that each parent needs to ask about each individual child. Hopefully, with the input of educators and medical professionals along with mommy/daddy-radar everyone comes to their own conclusions with each individual case.

In my case, I've looked at my 2 children who are on some type of behavioral/mood medication and seen (1) they were having difficulties beyond the normal range (I would be sad to see them suffering and they stood out to me significantly from their peers), (2) behaviors were detrimentally getting in the way of their potential (academic, social, etc.), (3) the responses from others (family, peers, teachers) to their behaviors/moods were negatively affecting their self-esteem.

I guess a good first question is: are the behaviors negatively impacting his success at school and his family life on a consistent basis for an extended period of time? And also, have other methods been tried?

[egoldber]

In my case, I've looked at my 2 children who are on some type of behavioral/mood medication and seen (1) they were having difficulties beyond the normal range (I would be sad to see them suffering and they stood out to me significantly from their peers), (2) behaviors were detrimentally getting in the way of their potential (academic, social, etc.), (3) the responses from others (family, peers, teachers) to their behaviors/moods were negatively affecting their self-esteem.

This is what lead us to finally try meds for older DD. It was not until this year (4th grade) that I felt that she was far enough outside the norm and it was making an impact socially to the extent that meds were worth it.

I think that point comes differently for each kid, and for some kids not at all.

[HIU8]

Thank you both. No one has ever put it to me this way. It is very helpful.