I hate my in-laws

[ha98ed14]

Really, I do. SIL is worse than MIL, but today MIL took the cake. Of course she will always see her own daughter's point of view, but sometimes the comments are just really hurtful. Shove your head as far as you can up your ass and you might begin to approach these people's level of self absorption.

[edurnemk]

:hug: I totally get it because I hate mine, too. They're capable of anything to get their way, everything is about them, etc. Hang in there.

[jenfromnj]

I'm sorry! It's awful to have self-absorbed relatives (or "relatives") who automatically think that whatever their child says is right/true. So frustrating.

[MontrealMum]

:hug: I totally get where you're coming from and it sucks! My 40th b-day was last Sat. and ALL of them completely ignored, or forgot, it. Yet at the same time I'm expected to be planning something for MIL's b-day which is in a week and a half because SIL is not local (an hour away) and bad at party planning and has dumped it on DH. Which means me. Honestly, besides a gift/card, I don't have anything in the works at this point. After 17 years of this carp from DH's family I just don't have it in me anymore to deal with the totally uneven expectations and the assumption that everything MUST go their way.

[hellokitty]

Well, if it makes you feel any better, I feel the same way about my mil. She is the most self absorbed, selfish person I have ever met. Is it evil to say that I am really upset that she probably inherited her mother's longevity gene and will be on this earth to make us miserable for a long, long time?

[StantonHyde]

I have this with my dad. I got this email from him saying he wants a guaranteed time he can reach us on the phone and be able to talk to me and DH for a looooong time every week. (which involves him pontificating for at least 30 minutes with each of us and repeating the same convo 2x) He says he needs this because "it give me a reason to keep living". hmm, well if you put it that way, I will make sure we are never around when you call!!

I stopped returning his "emergency" phone calls when I realized that as soon as he left a message for me, he dialed 6 other people and told them the same story 6 times over. So--if he doesn't get to tell it for the 7th time that day, life is over? Call your dang therapist!

And he is only 72!!!!!!! His mother lived to be 96. It is going to be a loooooong 20 fricking years!

[Nicsmom]

I also have a self-absorbed, selfish MIL, and know how hard this can be. Sorry.

[hellokitty]

I have this with my dad. I got this email from him saying he wants a guaranteed time he can reach us on the phone and be able to talk to me and DH for a looooong time every week. (which involves him pontificating for at least 30 minutes with each of us and repeating the same convo 2x) He says he needs this because "it give me a reason to keep living". hmm, well if you put it that way, I will make sure we are never around when you call!!

I stopped returning his "emergency" phone calls when I realized that as soon as he left a message for me, he dialed 6 other people and told them the same story 6 times over. So--if he doesn't get to tell it for the 7th time that day, life is over? Call your dang therapist!

And he is only 72!!!!!!! His mother lived to be 96. It is going to be a loooooong 20 fricking years!

OMG, your dad sounds like a combo of my mil and my parents put together. I HATE that my parents used to force us to make mandatory phone calls to them each wk. Even if we had nothing to say. I've fallen out of that habit since having kids, but my mom was here yesterday and bugged me about it and said that we should talk more often on the phone. That usually means that she digs me for info about my personal life (yesterday's dig was her thinking it was appropriate to ask me how much $$$ my DH makes and when I snapped back that it was inappropriate, she acted all hurt about it, she asks this question several times a yr), criticizes it (gave her a belated mother's day gift yesterday, which she apparently hated) and then complains about my dad and then when I agree with her that my dad is an a$$, she gets mad at me for saying bad things about my dad, ugh. So, no, I have no desire to talk to her.

My mil gives us a guilt trip if we do not call her enough, to tell us that she could have died and we wouldn't have even known. :6: As if my fil, who is alive and well would not notice the stink of her dead body!?!? She is only 65, her mom died at 95. We potentially have a very long 30 yrs ahead of us having to deal with her, plus having to deal with my parents too, but my dad is extremely unhealthy, so I don't think he will live that long. My mil basically enjoys talking about how everyone else has a better life than she has and about everyone should feel sorry for her, b/c she has lived such a, "hard" life (not really). Plus she is a hypochondriac, so her normal, "status" is that she is always deathly ill. I told my DH this and he got irritated with me for being sarcastic when his mom came home from a 2 mo trip to korea and declared when she got back that she was, "so sick." I said, "what's new, that's her normal status?" If you ask her how she is, she never says that she is doing well, she always tells you she is sick and then goes on and on about it. For someone who has a bunch of scans every yr and all sorts of testing, the doctors have YET to come up with ANY diagnosis. She's basically sick in the head, and everyone else seems to realize this except for herself, fil, bil, and my DH who ware so used to her acting this way, it's just, "normal" to them.

[StantonHyde]

the doctors have YET to come up with ANY diagnosis. She's basically sick in the head, and everyone else seems to realize this except for herself, fil, bil, and my DH who ware so used to her acting this way, it's just, "normal" to them.

See, I have always thought that being able to tell people its all in their head is an advantage. But for my dad, being "mentally ill" is his identity. So if you tell him that somebody else has worse issues than he has---oh nooooooo, nobody has suffered like he has. But then when you tell him that you don't want the kids visiting him alone etc because he can't handle it, he is sooooo offended (but he was telling you last week that he is just barely above being suicidal)!!!!! Or he gets to say that everyone is mentall ill--just like him, but nobody has it as bad as he does. Pick one track--any track!!!

What's the definition of a narcisstic personality disorder? Somebody who is happy only when everyone around them is miserable! Yes he is mentally ill but that's a reason, not an excuse. Ever since my mom died 5 years ago, my interactions with my father have been one long, giant lesson in setting boundaries. Thank God DH is on board!

[StantonHyde]

[QUOTE=hellokitty;3146860]My mil gives us a guilt trip if we do not call her enough, to tell us that she could have died and we wouldn't have even known. :6: As if my fil, who is alive and well would not notice the stink of her dead body!?!? [QUOTE]


:hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:

If we didn't laugh, we would cry!!!