My toddler is a climber/hitter HELP

[Octobermommy]

My 19 month old just began climbing on furniture. I have found him on top of the dining room table and jumping on my high mattress. He has no fear. My older children never did any of these things so I am at a loss. I say no, take him down, redirect but he does it over and over. I don't have any place to store my dining chairs and I have a smooth floor so he can scoot them over.

The reality is I can't watch him every second and I am going to lose my mind!

Also, he is a hitter. He has been for months now. He hits when he is mad. We say "no hit" and "gentle" and then guide his hand gently. Again, neither of my older kids do this.

Any btdt advice?

[amatahrain]

Would love some advice too. My 20 month old niece lives with me and my 16 month old daughter has bite marks on one elbow and both knees. The kid loves elbows and knees for some reason! My DD has started hitting now too! For a long time we kept my DD in long sleeves and pants and that was fine since it was winter, but it's pretty hot here now so we need a new plan of action.

My niece is a climber but she is very cautious and seems to know her limit. Thank God, if not I think she would have ended up on top of the fridge by now.

Obviously we watch them but sometimes it's hard and they are just so BUSY at this age!

[scrooks]

My DS is also a bit of a climber....way more than DD ever was. My solution is to gate our family room and eating area and keep him in there where the potential for falls or accidents is severely limited. I see other people with kids my ds's age wander around completely ungated and I don't know how they do it. I would have to be watching him every sinlge second.

[georgiegirl]

It will get better with age. My 22 month old just stopped hitting people for no reason. He's still pretty wild when it come to climbing . I have to watch him constantly in the kitchen since he does push the chairs all over so he can climb on the counters in search of dangerous things. I did end up rearranging things and moving stuff like knives so he cannot access them, and I took the knobs off my stove and dishwasher months ago when I noticed he was pushing the chair to th stove and turning it on at 18 months. He is beginning to unrstand things like "too hot, burn". But we did have an incident where he turned on the toaster oven and burned his hand on the heating element. I now make sure anything he can possibly reach is unplugged (with the plug hidden or out of reach.). My DD wasn't like this at all. Its very draining.

Eta: I've joked about renting him out as part of baby-proofing other peoples homes because he can and will find anything that any possible child could get into. He was crawling at 5 months and walking at 9.5 months. Thank goodness he's short, so he is physically limited in what he can climb up on sometimes, but he is very creative about finding stuff to help him climb on taller stuff.

[hellokitty]

We are in the same boat. DS1 was not a hitter or a climber, DS2 was a climber and sometimes a hitter, DS3 is a avid climber AND hitter. He makes me feel like pulling my hair out. Several times DH and I have opted to just let him fall off of something (ie: chair) that he insists on climbing on, b/c that is the ONLY way this child seems to learn. He is 22 mo old now and finally starting to talk a little bit, which I am finding is helping more with the communication dept and although we still have trouble getting him to listen to us, I would say he is starting to listen more than before, esp when I dish out a warning that he might hurt himself or ask if he wants a time out.

[Octobermommy]

Unfortunately I can't gate the areas off. This boy is going to give me a heart attack. Any other advice?

[brittone2]

DS1 was not a climber, but DD was, and DS2 is. He is 14 months and will get on the dining table, climb onto my kitchen desk, etc.

IMO it really comes down to a choice between driving yourself insane during all waking hours, or finding a way to babyproof with gates. Gate him in with you or gate off the areas you don't want him accessing. I wear DS2 on my back for a large part of the day because I can't supervise him 100% of the time. If he's on my back, I know he's staying out of trouble. IMO there really isn't much else you can do with a toddler. It comes down to setting up the environment to keep them safe and keep yourself sane, or finding a way to contain them with you (on your back, etc.). eta: and redirecting, which you are already doing. Give them lots of chances to climb on things outside, etc. but that isn't really going to help in the short-term with climbing inside, IME. If you can't gate off the other areas, can you gate him *in* one babyproofed room?

[american_mama]

DD2 was a hitter around age 2.... yikes, just now I am remembering specific incidents to determine how long the phase lasted, and I think it went on for months and months. Maybe that means my advice is ineffective, but here it is:

DD2 would hit for no reason, with no warning. It was practically a greeting for her, so I had to stay very close to her, literally by her side, when she was first coming into a situation or new kids, or if it was a kid that she tended to hit. We would rehearse in advance what she could do when she was excited (jump up and down, clap hands, say "Hi!" loudly, lots of things to try to get her physical energy and enthusiasm out in a safe way). We'd also rehearse what to do when something went wrong (child took her toy), usually involving getting an adult. When she would hit, we had a simple mantra, something like place her hands at her sides, hitting hurts, sit in timeout.

I also got angry and slapped DD2's hands on multiple occasions after she'd hit. Not sure if that helped or hurt, but I say it only to say the level of frustration can be very high for a parent. One day on the playground, two mothers standing near me didn't know DD2 was my kid and said, "Gee, how would you like to be THAT kid's mom?" which made me feel pretty embarrassed... couldn't even confront them because I was flying across the playground to intervene with DD2.

I remember feeling like I was being consistent about all these things and DD2 should respond within weeks, but really, it took months. It was just a much longer timeframe than I expected. DD2 did stop hitting around age 2.5 years or so and has not been a hitter ever since. On the upside, she doesn't get pushed around at all, isn't intimidated at all. She is still an aggressive kid... a little competitive in sports, likes to be first, physically active, scowls/gets in your face if she's mad, but that's manageable and has obvious upsides in the right context.

[HIU8]

Can you use a play yard gate so you gate him in an area with toys etc? Or do you have one room you can completely baby proof and gate off? We had to do that with DD who got into literally everything (she was not a climber but very early on figured out the baby proof door hinges etc...). Even now, at almost 4, we had to put a new childproof lock on our sliding glass door. DD figured out how to get out and would go outside on her own. We put a second lock up at the top of the door (no way she can reach it even with a chair).

[JBaxter]

Caught Jack walking the deck rail last week. just like the balance beam at little gym. My knees almost buckled. Our deck is OVER the walk out basement.
I've had 2 climbers I used to joke that they had mountain goat and monkey DNA. Watch them as much as possible and teach them out to get down. DS2 ( connor) climbed on top of the fridge to get cookies when he was about 2.5 he stacked things in order to get high enough on the counter.

When I hear other people say they have a climber i shutter a bit because I KNOW what they can do. Nothing is safe here. He uses toys, chairs boxes baskets to get where he wants. Who would have thought you need to child proof the UPPER cabinets?

No advice ... maybe a nice glass of wine in the evening.

climbers see baby gates/ yards as a challenge. None have stopped Jack. I would have to bolt 2 ( one above the other) to keep him in a room. I turned the knob around on his bedroom door to lock him in at night

[Octobermommy]

Wow, these kids are brave! We have moved the chairs away from the dining table and it helps cut down on the scaling of the table. He fell outside last weekend trying to climb a chair and cut his lip pretty bad. I think he is just going to have a lot of bumps and bruises.

We don't have deck railing so we are safe from that. Sounds scary Jeana.

[blue]

He fell outside last weekend trying to climb a chair and cut his lip pretty bad. I think he is just going to have a lot of bumps and bruises.

.

Unfortunatly, he probally will get lots of bumps and bruises :(... at least my DS does, he is usually sporting a new head wound every week :shake:... I am trying to help him learn to climb saftly-- maybe try that with your little guy?

You said gates will not work, have you tried doornob covers? They might help keep your DS out of your bedroom.... When DS's climbing getts bad, I remove the chairs to the tables, any big toys he can climb on and stack.... I don't know how fesable that is with other kids thow.
ETA: Sorry for all the spelling errors, I am on someone elses computer and can not figure out how to change it.

[LearningAsWeGo]

I also have climbers, but thankfully, they have demonstrated really good balance and seem to stop just before something needing the ER happens.

If you really can't gate the areas off, since this will pass at some point, I would remove as much as possible from the area. Even if it's annoying now to remove all chairs and then move them back in, I would do it so I had some peace of mind. Do you have a nearby room you can close the door on so you can store chairs out of the way and easily retrieve them?

Also, and I'm sure you've done this, but make sure to anchor anything you can to the wall. We recently got a new bookshelf and I put a little trinket near the top so it wouldn't attract the kids. Well, within a day or two, my older son asked me about it b/c he had it in his hands! He admitted to climbing up to get it. With him, I reinforce how dangerous climbing is.

Hmm, I have no idea if this will work, but what about setting up a safe area where they can climb? Put down lots of cushions and let them know this is the only place to climb?

Good luck!