BabbyO
06-08-2011, 12:46 PM
Another MIL rant...maybe I'm just being ungrateful, but sometimes MIL just doesn't think things through.
DS turns 2 in July. I was planning his party the weekend of his birthday, but since SIL will be flying in over 4th of July we changed it to that weekend.
DH and I were discussing the invite list. We have a small house and 2 pretty large families so we decided last year for DS' birthday we were keeping the invite list to a minimum; our parents, our siblings, our grandmothers (only 2 living), DS' Godparents and the babysitter's family. This still brought about 20 people to our house.
We were thinking we'd do a similar guest list this year, but we wanted to invite DH's cousin and his wife who just had a baby. They are fairly young and we see them struggling with the fact that most of their friends aren't married and don't have kids...and they don't get to spend time with their old friends. We remember how tough the transition was for us...and thought they might enjoy an afternoon with us.
Anyway, this brought about a discussion with the IL's because we don't want to hurt anyone's feelings by inviting some but not others. This led to the discussion of how DH's grandma didn't really enjoy the party last year because it was too hot and our house can't accommodate 20 people very well...so our parties are outside, and she doesn't like being around all that many people, esp if she doesn't know them...blah, blah, blah. MIL offered to just have a party at their house with DH's side of the family on the weekend of DS' birthday to avoid all the potential conflict (people not being invited, grandma not being comfortable, etc).
I really appreciate this. But...her first suggestion is Sunday. I HATE going to their house on Sunday's because they are perpetually 2 hours late with everything. We run into DS not eating until WAY later than he should, we can't get out the door before 8:30 pm (and we have an hour drive home) and it just is a pain because Sunday nights are already hectic trying to get ready for the week.
So I asked if Saturday would work instead. She said she'd ask FIL and get back to us.
Well, I just got an email from MIL...that was sent to DH's entire family. The party IS on Saturday (so I appreciate that), but its at 3 pm??? She didn't talk to us about the time at all. This is pretty much the witching hour with DS...he's overtired because he won't go down at his regular nap time, so usually somewhere between 3 and 4 we finally get him to nap. But he is a total bear to deal with until he passes out.
I guess I shouldn't complain...but seriously...the party is supposed to be for DS and he'll (hopefully) be asleep for the first 1-1.5 hours of it...or worse, he'll be cranky and crabby because he's too worked up (because he's at G-ma & G-pa's) to nap.
How hard would it have been to call or email and ask if 3 pm worked? I know she's not used to taking into account a toddler's nap schedule, but she just saw the meltdown that happens when it's not taken into account this weekend...and she's seen it for every get together they've had in the last 6 mo.
Sorry this is so long...I just needed to get that out. DH doesn't see the problem.
DS turns 2 in July. I was planning his party the weekend of his birthday, but since SIL will be flying in over 4th of July we changed it to that weekend.
DH and I were discussing the invite list. We have a small house and 2 pretty large families so we decided last year for DS' birthday we were keeping the invite list to a minimum; our parents, our siblings, our grandmothers (only 2 living), DS' Godparents and the babysitter's family. This still brought about 20 people to our house.
We were thinking we'd do a similar guest list this year, but we wanted to invite DH's cousin and his wife who just had a baby. They are fairly young and we see them struggling with the fact that most of their friends aren't married and don't have kids...and they don't get to spend time with their old friends. We remember how tough the transition was for us...and thought they might enjoy an afternoon with us.
Anyway, this brought about a discussion with the IL's because we don't want to hurt anyone's feelings by inviting some but not others. This led to the discussion of how DH's grandma didn't really enjoy the party last year because it was too hot and our house can't accommodate 20 people very well...so our parties are outside, and she doesn't like being around all that many people, esp if she doesn't know them...blah, blah, blah. MIL offered to just have a party at their house with DH's side of the family on the weekend of DS' birthday to avoid all the potential conflict (people not being invited, grandma not being comfortable, etc).
I really appreciate this. But...her first suggestion is Sunday. I HATE going to their house on Sunday's because they are perpetually 2 hours late with everything. We run into DS not eating until WAY later than he should, we can't get out the door before 8:30 pm (and we have an hour drive home) and it just is a pain because Sunday nights are already hectic trying to get ready for the week.
So I asked if Saturday would work instead. She said she'd ask FIL and get back to us.
Well, I just got an email from MIL...that was sent to DH's entire family. The party IS on Saturday (so I appreciate that), but its at 3 pm??? She didn't talk to us about the time at all. This is pretty much the witching hour with DS...he's overtired because he won't go down at his regular nap time, so usually somewhere between 3 and 4 we finally get him to nap. But he is a total bear to deal with until he passes out.
I guess I shouldn't complain...but seriously...the party is supposed to be for DS and he'll (hopefully) be asleep for the first 1-1.5 hours of it...or worse, he'll be cranky and crabby because he's too worked up (because he's at G-ma & G-pa's) to nap.
How hard would it have been to call or email and ask if 3 pm worked? I know she's not used to taking into account a toddler's nap schedule, but she just saw the meltdown that happens when it's not taken into account this weekend...and she's seen it for every get together they've had in the last 6 mo.
Sorry this is so long...I just needed to get that out. DH doesn't see the problem.