Any co-sleepers/ bed sharers want to share their stories with me?

[momm]

Any co-sleepers/ bed-sharers out there? I want some commiseration.

We've been bed-sharing since DS was born, he's 9 months now. He is mostly nursed to sleep. He also nurses at night. (it was out of necessity at first and now it's out of habit)

So some nights he wakes up screaming after four hours of sleep. Like screaming with tears running down his face. After about a minute of me holding him/ patting him, he goes right back to sleep as though nothing happened. I've sometimes been awake when it happens and know for a fact that there's nothing there to disturb him. i.e. he wakes up on his own.

Is this a phase? Do I need to wean him from nursing to sleep? Does anyone have any stories to share with me?

* Please don't judge me for having him sleep in bed. As I said it was a necessity due to some feeding issues earlier on.

Thank you

[marymoo86]

If it works for you then it is great. It sounds like the wake up could be a nightmare since there isn't anything happening to wake him up. Is it every night or occasionally?

[momm]

If it works for you then it is great. It sounds like the wake up could be a nightmare since there isn't anything happening to wake him up. Is it every night or occasionally?
Almost every night for the past couple of weeks.
It doesn't bother ME as much, I just worry a lot about him getting enough sleep

[LearningAsWeGo]

Any co-sleepers/ bed-sharers out there? I want some commiseration.

We've been bed-sharing since DS was born, he's 9 months now. He is mostly nursed to sleep. He also nurses at night. (it was out of necessity at first and now it's out of habit)

So some nights he wakes up screaming after four hours of sleep. Like screaming with tears running down his face. After about a minute of me holding him/ patting him, he goes right back to sleep as though nothing happened. I've sometimes been awake when it happens and know for a fact that there's nothing there to disturb him. i.e. he wakes up on his own.

Is this a phase? Do I need to wean him from nursing to sleep? Does anyone have any stories to share with me?

* Please don't judge me for having him sleep in bed. As I said it was a necessity due to some feeding issues earlier on.

Thank you

I'm a full supporter of the family bed! :)

We experienced this with our older son and have experienced versions of those at different times over his 4 years. We chalked it up to nightmares/night terrrors. I recall they happened a few nights in a row and when they were really bad, he couldn't be easily consoled. I just sat with him, made sure he was safe and sometimes, I offered him water to try to wake him up enough to stop the crying. I didn't engage him in activity/talking. Just like you do - patting, shushing, holding.

So long as everything is safe, I think this too will pass. You definitely don't need to wean him at night b/c of this. I think he'll want the extra comfort from you and nursing him back to sleep may be helpful.

[LearningAsWeGo]

Almost every night for the past couple of weeks.
It doesn't bother ME as much, I just worry a lot about him getting enough sleep

One more thought - often this happened for us around growth periods, periods of transition (learning to walk, learning new words, taking in lots of information).

[krobbin]

:yeahthat:

Also, he might be teething. That's what happened when DD got her first 2 teeth in at 5m old, but she was also cranky during the day - so not sure if you're going through the same thing.

Maybe it hurts, if he's showing signs of teething (chewing, drooling, swollen gums), maybe you'd be inclined to try infant advil/tylenol before bed. If it helps, then he was probably in pain.

If you want the natural route (I've tried both and honestly, advil worked the best). You can try the borion camila liquid and/or hylands teething gel (not sure if the teething tables are available - heard they were recalled).

[momm]

:yeahthat:

Also, he might be teething. That's what happened when DD got her first 2 teeth in at 5m old, but she was also cranky during the day - so not sure if you're going through the same thing.

Maybe it hurts, if he's showing signs of teething (chewing, drooling, swollen gums), maybe you'd be inclined to try infant advil/tylenol before bed. If it helps, then he was probably in pain.

If you want the natural route (I've tried both and honestly, advil worked the best). You can try the borion camila liquid and/or hylands teething gel (not sure if the teething tables are available - heard they were recalled).


Thank you for the thoughts and the suggestions. He is not teething now, but I will keep this in mind for when he is!

Thanks again

[lizzywednesday]

...
If you want the natural route (I've tried both and honestly, advil worked the best). You can try the borion camila liquid and/or hylands teething gel (not sure if the teething tables are available - heard they were recalled).

FYI, Hyland's teething gel contains belladonna (it's an alkaloid herb; some info on its uses is available on Wikipedia here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atropa_belladonna#Uses) which can have side effects like racing heart rate. It's supposed to be dilute enough not to cause this side effect due to the way it's refined, but I didn't like that it was in something given to infants.

You do have the option of Orajel Naturals, which uses clove oil. Based on my DD's reaction, it works pretty well, assuming your LO doesn't have a sensitivity to clove/clove oil.

We did not use ibuprofen or acetaminofen with DD due to her being on aspirin therapy and I was concerned about drug interactions.

[PGTB]

we used some teething pellets a couple of times, no effect. Infant Ibprofen is what works best for us. The problem is that it will wear out towards the morning and DS is extremely difficult to administer medication to even before bed, not to mention in the middle of the night.

[Katigre]

I loved nursing my babies to sleep and didn't stop doing that until they were over a year old. If it's working for you, then keep doing it IMO. No need to stop if it's getting him to sleep and you're happy with it :).

We also bedshare with our kids (or did until recently, now they're in bunk beds in their own room but sometimes come to ours in the wee morning hours for cuddles).

[Firsttime]

Hey, we bed-share (Attached Parenting format) and my DS, also at 9mos did exactly the same. He was good sleeper up until then and got his first 2 teeths without any issues and before we even got to know it. But then something happened.
I went back to my list of usual suspects - am i eating dairy prods, allergens like peanuts, is he not napping well because he is not enough stimulated during the day, more teeth, new developments (he's crawling, learning new tricks etc), do we have routine and calmness throughout the day (I am into No cry sleep solution -Elizabeth Panteleo)

In the end there were elements of this and that and since I tried every solution to fix it at the same time, not sure which one has worked but it is getting better now at the end of 9mos (knock on wood). It could be a phase or combination of culprits (and guessing since the post was long ago- something has worked for ya - pliz do tell for my ref if it is to happen to me again!).

I do hug him and console him back to sleep (which now is my problem that he cannot go back to sleep by himself but its usually within 5mins that he sleeps), offer him water to drink (it has been dry and warm lately).

I would not be apologetic about bed sharing - it has saved my sleep all these months. Bed-sharing wasn't in my postpartum plan either. I did not have to be more awake to drag myself to a crib each time or hear him crying through the monitor and be worried that I need to chk on him etc etc. I got my sleep and I am a person who cannot do with less than 8hrs of sleep. That is until he hit the 9months and started crying when he woke in the middle of the night.
Oh btw, teething necklaces (baltic amber) are also something to look at.

[ThreeofUs]

We also have a family bed, though we would have laughed if anyone had suggested it to us pre-kids, and didn't know that we would enjoy it so much. I agree with pps: if it's working for you, don't stop. He'll be out of your bed, not nursing, soon enough.

As for the waking/screaming, I think you also might want to consider that he's going through a developmental phase. Kids often experience sleep disturbances at such times in their lives.

GL!

[Multimama]

Others have given you good suggestions, but I just wanted to say that DS went through the same thing at 9 months. I kind of drove myself crazy trying to figure out why he was waking up. (It *was* disturbing my sleep.) But we never did figure it out. I think sometimes it's part of a developmental phase or a constellation of factors that they just grow through and out of. So even though these suggestions are good, if you can't figure it out, try not to worry.