So Tips on preping under 3 yo for a new sibling?

[BabbyO]

DS is 2 yo...will be about 26 mo when DS2 is born. We talk to him about his brother...and there is a baby in mommys tummy...but I know he really doesn't get it.

We're about 8 weeks from my EDD and we've made all the major changes. DS is in his new room and has been for almost a month. His bed was converted to a toddler bed in June (un-planned and un-expected...but since he started climbing out we figure we'd better not postpone so the changes are complete before #2).

DH and I have really been trying to spend some good quality one-on-one time with DS instead of always being distracted by the remaining preparations for #2.

Any other suggestions for preping the under 3 yo crowd? This is a tough age...I know the concept of another person just doesn't click...and the concept of time doesn't really either (at least not something 8 weeks out).

I guess the only thing we haven't talked about is where he'll be going while I'm in the hospital...but that's because we haven't figured it out yet :bag

TIA!

[BayGirl2]

I am in exactly the same boat. Due in 7 weeks, DS will be 27 months when DD is born. We've been talking about it for a long time, even had him wear a big brother shirt to announce it to the family. He just moved to his big boy bed and now seems settled in there. We talk about baby all the time, he pats my belly, and often does the "baby" sign randomly at dinner and looks at me. We have 3 books about new babies/being a big brother that we read too.

We've mentioned Grandma is coming to stay with him, but haven't really talked a lot about us being gone for a couple days while he stays with her. I think the whole thing is just really far away in his time span. Like we've been talking about it for so long now he's wondering when that baby is going to show up.

I'll be watching this thread bc I'm not sure what other things we should be doing that we haven't already.

[smiles33]

My DDs are 37 months apart so DD1 had her 3rd birthday just 3 weeks before DD2 arrived. We did exactly the same thing. Moved her to her Big Girl room and Big Girl bed. Read books about the baby. Talked about how she would help me as the Big Sister (passing me diapers, bringing me books to read to her while nursing DD2). It went really well and she adored her little sister from the moment she met her at the hospital. We also had DD2 "give" DD1 a present at the hospital. Finally, I should note that I did not push for complete potty-training at all until a couple weeks later as DD1 was still wearing diapers during naptime/at night so I didn't want a regression after the baby came.

Oh, actually, I will say that it may have helped that DD is a girl and loves dolls. DD2 was like a new doll to her and DD1 loved just lying next to DD2 watching her on the activity mat.

[Nyfeara]

We just brought home DS2, and DS1 is 3.5 yrs old. We did most of what is mentioned above. We talked a lot about what we did when he was a baby and how we'd be doing those same things with his little brother.

We took him shopping with us when we bought things for the baby and allowed him to pick out a toy or two. We put a bit of emphasis on what he'd be able to do b/c he was older and a big brother vs. what his little brother would or would not be able to do. We also explained to him how the baby was going to 'act', that he would cry at night but that DS1 did not have to get up, that the baby might hit him or pull his hair, etc. We told him that we may not be able to do everything he wanted right away b/c of feeding the baby - things like that. We didn't want him to be surprised about how things would be different.

We also bought DS1 a small toy that was from DS2. We had them each give each other their 'gifts' when we brought DS2 home. DS1 was so excited that his new brother knew that he liked the characters from Cars 2!

Thankfully, DS1 is very into his big brother role and the transition has gone well so far. We'll see what happens once DS2 is mobile...

[janine]

In similar situaton although DD is a few months older than your DS. I also do alot of talking and explaining about her sister,etc. I think she grasps it a bit, but not the entirety. She will say things like "maybe my sister can have this since she is a baby" (points at small shoes,etc). I point things out on her favorite shows (Olivia, Caillou), where siblings are present. I also tell her she will always be my baby and #1 - no idea if this is appropriate but it's true and I want her to know she's still special even if another shows up!

I also plan on the gift from #2 to DD#1 once she's here. Either a charm and/or something for her baby doll (she is really into role playing being mommy to her dolls/animals right now thank goodness).
I think alot of it falls into place once the baby is here though. I'm most worried about DH stepping up with DD1 so I can focus on the baby - I've laid out how things will play out but I am still the one who preps her for bed, gets her moving, gives her baths etc (we both work).

[diamond]

what books did u read to kids? names please? do the local library have these? ty

[ashleybama24]

We just did this yesterday although my son is only 21 months. It was total chaos (cluster$%^& might be a better word) as my in-laws decided to show up with pizza. We didn't get home from the hospital until bedtime and DS1 was so overwhelmed with all the extra people in our house that it ended with both children crying in tandem. DH and I had to tag team to feed, bathe, and calm them both down while dealing with a house full of people. Not exactly how I envisioned it going.

The plan was to say hi to DS1 first since we hadn't seen him in 2 1/2 days and then bring in DS2 for him to meet. We didn't bring him to the hospital since we were afraid it would result in a total meltdown with his sudden separation anxiety. Today has been great as just a family of 4 even though DS1 is still really unsure of why this baby is here and keeps crying. He pats him on the head and just offered him his cup of milk but gets very upset if we have to walk out of the room he is in. We talked quiet a bit about the baby in mommy's tummy and showing him other babies, reading books about being a big brother, and letting him have a cabbage patch doll to play with. That helped the most as he started to cover the baby with a blanket, feed it and take care of it.

[hillview]

My boys are 25 months apart. DS1 didn't really get it at all. He was happy and ignorant of DS2 for the most part for the first 9 months. Once he outgrew the play pen area that is when there were some issues (DS2 knocking down DS1's legos etc). I suggest some help when DS2 arrives so you can still spend some time with DS1 1:1. We got DS1 a baby doll and he really liked it for a few months. I also got several little toys to give him when I was nursing etc.

GOOD LUCK!!
/hillary

[MomToOne]

I would probably expose him to as many babies in real life as you can possibly get next to.

[RunnerDuck]

My girls turned 3 four days before my last was born. I didn't really prep them beyond their knowing a baby was in my belly and he was a boy and he would be born etc. I was worried there would be jealousy - esp. from my "little" one who has always been a mama's girl. DH kept telling me I needed to break her of that - how they heck do you break the baby of being the baby??? (My girls are twins but they are VERY different in looks and personality... one has always been smaller and clingier...)

Anyway - all my kids have done amazingly well with the new baby. So far no jealous. Lots of love and head rubbing and tickling.

Maybe it was a fluke but in my case no prep was really needed.

[BabbyO]

We just did this yesterday although my son is only 21 months. It was total chaos (cluster$%^& might be a better word) as my in-laws decided to show up with pizza. We didn't get home from the hospital until bedtime and DS1 was so overwhelmed with all the extra people in our house that it ended with both children crying in tandem. DH and I had to tag team to feed, bathe, and calm them both down while dealing with a house full of people. Not exactly how I envisioned it going.

The plan was to say hi to DS1 first since we hadn't seen him in 2 1/2 days and then bring in DS2 for him to meet. We didn't bring him to the hospital since we were afraid it would result in a total meltdown with his sudden separation anxiety. Today has been great as just a family of 4 even though DS1 is still really unsure of why this baby is here and keeps crying. He pats him on the head and just offered him his cup of milk but gets very upset if we have to walk out of the room he is in. We talked quiet a bit about the baby in mommy's tummy and showing him other babies, reading books about being a big brother, and letting him have a cabbage patch doll to play with. That helped the most as he started to cover the baby with a blanket, feed it and take care of it.

Oh, man...sounds like a chaotic day. I'm sorry it didn't go as planned...but that's why parents are who they are...we learn to just roll with it! Sounds like your DS1 is doing ok...minus the confusion caused by a lot of people (which I know would happen in my house even without a new baby!)


My boys are 25 months apart. DS1 didn't really get it at all. He was happy and ignorant of DS2 for the most part for the first 9 months. Once he outgrew the play pen area that is when there were some issues (DS2 knocking down DS1's legos etc). I suggest some help when DS2 arrives so you can still spend some time with DS1 1:1. We got DS1 a baby doll and he really liked it for a few months. I also got several little toys to give him when I was nursing etc.

GOOD LUCK!!
/hillary

I'm hoping DS1 will be a bit like this...but pretty sure he won't be. He ALWAYS notices when babies/toddlers are crying or sound upset. Yesterday we were at BRU and there was a 10 mo old that was excited about seeing Elmo...but DS thought he was crying. He immediately pointed out, "mommy, baby crying." He does this at swimming lessons quite a bit, too. I'm concerned that the crying will upset him. I try to alway tell him that the baby's parents are taking care of the crying child...but DS always looks SO concerned. I guess it is good to know that he has compassion.


I would probably expose him to as many babies in real life as you can possibly get next to.

I'm so trying to do this...but the people I know with young babies live too far away for us to visit. It makes it doubly tough when I only see DS for 2 hours a day during the week. We've seen a few at the beach during swimming lessons the last couple weeks...but as I mentioned before...he gets SO concerned when he hears crying.