I can't stand the neighborhood kids

[mariza]

But DD and DS really want to play with them so I put on my game face and let them, but I really really am getting sick of this BS!
Next door neighbor, I'll call her "B" is 6 and has had free roam of the neighborhood as long as I've known her since she was two. Wanders around with no supervision and her mom is never home and according to my babysitter who also sits for this girl, there is never any food in the house which would explain why I am always feeding her! There is a family that owns a home on a pond across the street from us and only uses the house on weekends. I'll call her kids "C" and "D". This Mom lives in the city and has openly said to me that they love spending weekends here because they feel that the neighborhood is safe (on a cul de sac) they just let the kids roam and don't worry about them. Hello, there is plenty to worry about...2 surrounding ponds, a cranberry bog that is easily accessible and lots of woods to get lost in.
I make my kids wear helmets, I make them tell me where there are and they must check in every so often. These kids go wherever they want, try to ride my kids bikes without helmets and the parents don't seem to give a crap. I can be supportive of free range parenting, but when your "free range" equals my having to supervise and give your kids snacks that were meant to go to school with my kids AND your little brats tell me they don't like the Lorna Doones and can they have the xyz instead I get really annoyed.

Then they whine and beg to use our waterside and I don't even want my own kids on it because I am battling a head cold and I just want to sit on the couch drinking tea. Finally I relent and say, fine you can go on the waterside, BUT you have to bring your own grown-up to watch you because I will not be responsible for 3 kids that don't belong to me, guess what? Not one adult came. Not that I'm surprised because they are not interested in watching their own kids. So then B, C and D decide to leave my kids and go swimming in C and D's pond. I won't let my kids go because I'm sick and don't want to go out and don't trust others to watch my kids near water. But when they are done swimming, they come right back and want to play in our sandbox and on our swings! Sorry I'm ranting all over the place, I've just had it with rude kids that are using mine when they are bored.

The girl next door is particularly upsetting because I feel bad and I want to help her, but her mom just doesn't care so I feel like why should I? Leaves "B" in the care of her 10 year old son with known mental health issues while she works and when she's not working she spends hours at the gym and/or the bar looking for her next man. For example last week B was on her brothers motor bike riding down hill until she crashed into the neighbors house. My kids were paralyzed with fear watching their friend crash (luckily she actually had a helmet on) and was not seriously injured, but could have easily been killed. She weighs about 35 lbs and is wayyyy to small for that kind of bike. When the other neighbor and I told the kids to call their mother she never bothered coming home from work to deal with the situation. The bike caused damage to neighbors house. Ugghh I wish she would just move already like she has been saying for the last 4 years!

[Melanie]

My head would explode. I'm sorry. I don't know how you deal with it.

[Gracemom]

Have you thought about calling social services? A six year old really should not be supervising herself, and if there is no food in the home, that is neglect. Maybe that mom needs a wake up call. Sorry you have to deal with all that, especially when you are sick.

[mariza]

Have you thought about calling social services? A six year old really should not be supervising herself, and if there is no food in the home, that is neglect. Maybe that mom needs a wake up call. Sorry you have to deal with all that, especially when you are sick.

Sadly, she has been interviewed by social services. They conveniently showed up right after she returned from a vacation so her excuse as to why there was no food was that they had been away for 10 days. They had also been visited by the police when her middle son went after her DD and older DS with a knife. Her ds1 had to call 911 from a locked bathroom to get help because she wasn't home. Sadly, I don't think there is anything bad enough that will be a wake up call for this woman. :(. I was hoping she would wake up when her DS put her DD on a motor bike but her response was "his heart was in the right place, he wanted to teach his sister to ride it"

[ha98ed14]

Sadly, she has been interviewed by social services. They conveniently showed up right after she returned from a vacation so her excuse as to why there was no food was that they had been away for 10 days. They had also been visited by the police when her middle son went after her DD and older DS with a knife. Her ds1 had to call 911 from a locked bathroom to get help because she wasn't home. Sadly, I don't think there is anything bad enough that will be a wake up call for this woman. :(. I was hoping she would wake up when her DS put her DD on a motor bike but her response was "his heart was in the right place, he wanted to teach his sister to ride it"

Wow. This is really scary stuff. I think you would be well within reason (certainly within rights) to say no to anything those children wanted to do with your kids or on your property. If only for your own liability. Heaven forbid something did happen on your watch or property, I have no doubt that someone with this attitude would not hesitate to sue you. It's always "not her fault"; she never owns responsibility for her kids, their safety or even nourishment, so if something bad happens, it most certainly will not be *HER* fault.

It probably would disappoint your DC, but I think it is worth it. When they ask why, you could give the simple phrase, "B & C play in ways that are unsafe." I'm sorry you are stuck dealing with this.

[mariza]

You must know her, or someone like her! That is exactly what I'm afraid of. When she used to come over and behave badly I would mention it to her mom and she would say "she spent the weekend with her dad, she always comes back from his house like that" I feel really bad for her 16yo who has been forced into a father role for her younger children. He is a really good kid that is in a sucky situation. His dad is very active in his life, I think that is why he is "normal" whereas the other 2 have 2 different dads, one of which is MIA and the other just moved out of state.
They dont have anyone except big brother to really look out for them and the poor kid just wants to be a normal teenager but he can't because he has 2 kids he has to raise :( The mom has flirted with the cops that have shown at her house and I think because she is attractive and has a respectable job, the "authorities" turn a blind eye to what is really going on.
I've tried to tell DD that this little girl is not a good friend to her and she says she knows, but then she says "she's been my bff since we were 2" and gets all sad. I feel bad for my DD and hope that she meets some nice new friends in first grade. She has a good friend that is a boy whose mom I have also gotten friendly with, but some jerky kids were teasing them calling them boyfriend and girlfriend and now the little boy is pulling away from my DD because of it. Sorry, this is turning into more of a pity party, but I feel so bad for my DD. It's hard for an anti-princess Star Wars loving girl to make friends with other girls around here :cry: