What to do about a thumb sucker

[mommylamb]

As you can see from my signature, DS is a thumb sucker. Now, I was a thumb sucker too, and for far longer than I care to admit. It's funny because he even sucks the same thumb.

Anyway, he'll be 5 in June, and I know we need to do something about this at some point, but I'm not really sure what to do and I'm reluctant to put yucky stuff on his thumb nail. He's not responsive to sticker charts or rewards-- at least he wasn't when we tried to use those devices while potty training. I just keep telling myself he's the kind of kid who does things at his pace.

We went to the dentist last week for his regular check up and the dentist says so far the thumb sucking isn't impacting his mouth or teeth, so we're ok for now, but she said that could change once he gets his permanent teeth, so better to try to stop it now. When he starts sucking it, I remind him that the dentist told him not to (he promised the dentist he would stop, but clearly he isn't keeping that pledge). Then again, maybe it won't cause problems. I never needed braces and have no residual problems from my many years of thumb sucking. Who knows.

Anyway, I'd be interested in your experiences with gently encouraging long term thumb suckers to put the thumb away.

[Simon]

No great advice here on the stopping front. Sorry. I sucked my thumb at night for a long time. I was probably 7 or even 8 before I completely gave it up. I only did it at night/bed time and it also didn't have any long-term impact on my teeth (AFAIK). I had other dental issues though. My parents ignored it most of the time and talked to me about it occasoinally and I eventually just lost interest and stopped on my own.

[AnnieW625]

If his issue is I public then I might tell him flat out he's too old, but if it is just during quiet time, nap or night time I wouldn't sweat it. I sucked my thumb at night until I was 6 or 7. My DD2 is a thumb sucker too and at 18 mos. DH already wants her to stop; I don't see a point. I had braces, but my dentist never said my teeth were worse because I sucked my thumb.

[fedoragirl]

I was just going to post a similar question except DS is 8 weeks old! Does this mean he'll be thumb sucking well into his childhood?

[cmo]

We successfully broke all 3 DCs thumb sucking habits. We mentioned the dentist, and how he said that it can hurt your mouth if you keep doing it, to bring in some authority. The kids were old enough to understand that, though it was not easy to quit the habit! It was mostly a nighttime problem, though if we ever saw it happening during the day, we'd say a quick, quiet, "thumb out of mouth!" to remind them. We let them bring something new to bed, a blankie or stuffed animal, to hold and keep the hands occupied. Before I went to bed at night, I would creep in and gently pull the thumb out if needed.

One DC was particularly challenging, and we used waterproof band-aids on her thumb because she kept popping it in her mouth in her sleep. If you have an adult friend or relative who is willing to help and be encouraging, you can set up a chart that covers a couple weeks. A child gets one sticker if he/she has a thumb-sucking free day, and another for the night. The child needs to call the adult helper each day (or every other day) and report if he/she got her stickers. Before beginning the chart, have the adult helper have an encouraging conversation with the child about how important it is to stop now that you're a big boy/girl. Praise is given if he/she got the stickers, and if not, something along the lines of "oh, I'm sorry to hear that, do you think you can do better tomorrow?" You can also have the child pick out a reward for completing the chart before you start with the stickers --- a new toy, going out for ice cream, a movie, etc. if you think it will be motivating.

Good luck, it can be done! Much patience is required. :-)

ETA: my kids were about 4 when we did this.

[PunkyBoo]

I don't see thumb sucking as a problem. Boo started sucking his thumb right before his 1st birthday, and that was when he also STTN for the first time. So I say YAY Thumb Sucking! If it brings him comfort I see no reason to take it from him (he's not even 3 yet). Punkin was a thumbsucker from day one. When he was a little over 3 years old, he had cut back to only sucking in his bed. His hands were always too busy playing, and I had gotten him used to asking me if he could have his thumb if we were out somewhere because often his hands were too dirty for me to feel comfortable with him putting it in his mouth. But he was jumping around on his bed one afternoon, and took a header over the bedrail, hit his face on the dresser on the way down (still has teethmarks in the top of the dreser) and face-planted on the hardwood floor. He bit almost though his lip and the 2 front teeth were slightly loosened. By some strange coincidence, he has a dentist appointment already scheduled for the next morning. The dentist took x-rays and said that the amount of looseness of the 2 front teeth necessitated he quit thumb sucking completely - otherwise the pressure would rot out the roots. So we explained to him why we had to do it, and then we would put one of DH's (clean) socks over his hand like a long-sleeved glove, and pull long-sleeve jammies over it, so his hand was pretty much stuck inside the sock. It took about 3 weeks, but he did quit.

[lablover]

My DD was an avid thumbsucker. It seemed her thumb was in her mouth 24/7. She did not stop until a few weeks before her 5th birthday. I tried the mavala stop (yucky polish) on her last Spring and it did nothing. Other than that I didn't do much besides tell her to take her thumb out at times, at which she would just reply that it was too hard. I know her preschool teacher was always reminding her to take her thumb out but nothing ever diminished it. We had the dentist talk to her and give her a sheet...nothing. Then this September I told her we were going to put the stuff on her nail again and she said okay. Her thumb went in her mouth one time and that was it. I still can't believe that she quit cold turkey. I think it worked this time because she wanted it to work. She asked me to repaint it on her nail for about a week and by then I knew she had kicked it.

[mommylamb]

I don't think he does it during school-- at least his teacher has told me she doesn't see him doing it. But he does it in the evening at home and definitely at night.

I think I stopped sucking mine when I was about 5 during the day, but I know I sucked it at night until much later (maybe 8 or 9). To this day, I know which thumb would fit better in my mouth and feel comforting, even though I do not suck my thumb (I swear).

[scrooks]

Im going to watch this thread for advice. My dd is very close in age to your ds and sucks her thumb. Not in public (in fact our sitter didnt realize she does it until i mentioned it) but when she is tired at night. I also sucked my thumb but i honestly can't remeber when i stopped.

[jenstring95]

Yeah, I'll be watching this thread too. DS and DD were/are both finger suckers (middle and ring on the left hand). DS quit right before he turned 4, and he quit all on his own. He and DD have generally done things at the same ages, so I am hoping DD (just turned 4) will give it up soon, but so far it is not looking good. I offered to paint her nails if she can quit (we have never done this). She is excited but says she just isn't ready yet. I have mentioned how the dentist says it's bad for her teeth, and DS told her he got a special present from the dentist when he quit (our dentist gives out "habit breaking" prizes - he got a CD/DVD case-holder-thingie), so before we go to the dentist she tries to quit, but so far it's not working. The other day she even told me, "Mommy, when I put my fingers in my mouth it helps me calm down.". Indeed.

[lalasmama]

From a former devoted thumb sucker, my one piece of advice is:

Leave it alone.

Sorry, I know it's not helpful. But for some kids, they will keep it up for many many years, and fight it the more the parent harps about it. I was a long-term thumber. In fact, I could go into bars before I gave it up.

And here's a secret that only long-term thumbers know.... You'd be shocked at the number of well-adjusted, well-respected adults that still suck on their thumb when stressed. In my circle of friends, there's a CPA, a DENTIST, and 2 nurses that all suck their thumbs when stressed.

I remember growing up and frustrating my mom. The nail polish, the rewards, the nagging, the ignoring... none of it worked for me. In truth, it all just made me more resolute in my thumbing, because it stressed me out all the more about it.

And for the record, I don't need braces either. Once I quit thumbing, my teeth moved on their own into a better placement.

[ett]

I'll be watching this thread too. DS2 will be 5 in January and still sucks his thumb. He mainly does it when he's sleeping and when we're cuddling and reading together. I'm currently trying to break his habit of needing to suck when we're reading together. I'm not sure what to do about nighttime. He hasn't sucked his thumb in public for a long time. All I had to do was tell him we don't suck our thumb when we're out.

[javabean]

My DS, almost 8, was an avid thumb sucker. I bought the Thumbguard off Amazon. It was amazing, and about after 3 weeks, he was "broke" the habit.... It's kinda pricey, but totally worth it...

[maestramommy]

Arwyn is a thumb sucker. Don't know what to do really. It's directly tied to her lovey. If she doesn't have it, she won't suck her thumb. So I started out by keeping lovey at home. I guess the next step would be to keep lovey for bedtime only.